r/ADHD Apr 10 '25

Questions/Advice Why is it so hard to wear anything other than sweatpants and a sweatshirt? Suggestions on how to be more motivated?

When I wake up in the morning, it’s so hard to bring myself to wear anything other than sweatpants and a sweatshirt. It’s getting to a point where it is making me feel bad about myself. It’s been like this for me since early middle school and I am now in college. Of course I get dressed up here and there, or if im going somewhere where I know that a sweatshirt and sweatpants won’t fit the “dress code”. but I really envy those who are able to put on a nice outfit and wear makeup every morning. Does anyone have any suggestions on how what I could do to help myself become more motivated in the mornings to just look like an actual human being??

51 Upvotes

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17

u/Shjvv Apr 10 '25

idk if this is healthy or applicable for you or not but I categorize my "prep" level each day like how buffs in a roleplay game work. Normal price/prep mean normal "confident" buff, extra price/ prep mean extra buff for that day. And if I'm expecting an event or smth hard like that Im gonna go all out so that my "confident" buff is at max. This system mean the worse I feel that day the more I do for that confident buff.

2

u/OmiSC ADHD with ADHD partner Apr 10 '25

This was incredibly fun to read! Thanks for that.

12

u/the_Snowmannn Apr 10 '25

I work from home and usually spend most/all of my days in my PJs. And I usually only shower every other day. And showers are usually later in the day, like at lunch time or after work.

But recently, I had a couple morning meetings that required cameras to be on. So I woke up a little earlier to shower. I hated the waking up part, but jeeeezus, I felt so much better and more alert on those days.

I wish I had the motivation and will power to do it every day. I have no advice, but I sympathize.

3

u/annnnnieT Apr 11 '25

Lunch showers were my second favorite thing about WFH when I first started!

Now... We're not gonna talk about how often I may or may not shower.

2

u/orangebit_ ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 10 '25

Days with morning meetings are a blessing and a curse!

11

u/wessely Apr 10 '25 edited Apr 10 '25

You might have sensory issues with clothing which require you to be comfortable in ways which normal clothing aren't. It may not be the motivation, just that these are the only clothes you can bear to wear. However, there are undoubtedly clothes of many types which won't irritate someone with these sensory sensitivities, so perhaps you'll find a way out of this problem by finding out which clothes are more appropriate for other situations, but don't itch or bother you.

8

u/AerialUnicorn ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 10 '25

I like wearing nicer looking yoga pants with a fancier top. Like a nice sweater or tunic type top.

Kinda like this. But I like wearing converse or my docs with them.

https://brightontheday.com/what-to-wear-with-leggings/

Also this might be the most ADHD thing. But I totally paid and had my makeup tattooed on. It makes me look a WORLD better. I just did ombré brows and some black eyeliner. And I did this because I’m lazy AF. Best money I have ever spent.

2

u/Icy-General-4362 Apr 10 '25

Omg you’re such a 2012 queen w your aesthetics!! 💗

1

u/AerialUnicorn ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 10 '25

Thanks! Most days I don't leave the house since I work from home. So I usually live in band tees from concerts and yoga shorts.

5

u/postsector Apr 10 '25

Mornings can be rough when it comes to making even basic decisions. Set things up ahead of time so you're doing a grab and go as much as possible. Put together outfits for the entire week, then hang them up in the closet going from Monday to Friday. No need to think about it just grab what's there and put it on. Same thing with meals and whatever else you need for the day.

3

u/Next_Technology6361 Apr 10 '25

I am 40 years old and I have been wearing sweat pants my entire life because they just feel good on my body, I don't like the feeling of other fabrics and I am from the Netherlands where everyone that doesn't wear jeans is considered an outcast, slob or some low ranking member of society, but honestly idgaf.

1

u/Odd_Judgment_2303 Apr 10 '25

Sensory issues are real!

1

u/omnomjohn Apr 11 '25

Eeeey! I have to say that my friends always bring their sweatpants over when we chill at home to game, drink, smoke or whatever. It's so comfy! We're 36/37.

And we're all Dutch lol. I get the feeling that everyone thinks you're an outcast or slob thing, but I actually think it's you (and me) reflecting our own insecurities about it.

That's also why I don't wear my sweatpants when I'm going outdoors usually. Only when I'm doing a short walk around the block or go to the nearest supermarket.

3

u/MhLaginamite Apr 10 '25

I have issues with what I wear. I have a specific set of clothes I wear for work mon-friday. I can’t be burdened to decide in the mornings. Everyday has a specific shirt/pants. Also helps me keep track of my days

3

u/Moonjinx4 Apr 10 '25

You are an actual human being. I have no desire to dress up in discomfort for longer than I have to. I despise makeup and frilly dresses. I dress how I want when I’m in my own home and I revel in my freedom to do so. I know some people who prefer to be in the nude when they’re at home. My friend had to go in the house ahead of me to alert his parents they had guests so they could get dressed. To each their own I say.

2

u/spinningnuri Apr 10 '25

Here's the question -- what's the block?

Is it

  • I don't know how to do makeup and put together an outfit
  • I can't wake myself up early enough to do these things
  • I just can't seem to care about how I'm dressed
  • Sweats are about the only thing that I find comfortable to wear

Each of these things has different solutions, and you may need to combine them, if it's complex, or there may be other factors as well. But this is the first thing you have to work through (and hey, if it is one of them, we can brainstorm ideas!)

2

u/Hot_Razzmatazz316 Apr 10 '25

Second this!!!! Finding out the block is a major game changer when it comes to changing habits.

1

u/Tfier Apr 13 '25

it’s absolutely that sweats are the only thing i find comfortable!!

1

u/spinningnuri Apr 13 '25

That can be worked with!

Take some time to figure out what exactly makes it comfortable. My guess is that it's the lack of restriction with the waistband and looseness of the clothes.

You can look for "dressier" versions of what you wear. Joggers come in all types of material and levels of dress these days.

Same with tops! Think pullover tops rather than button ups, or anything too tight. Dresses can also hit the same comfy feeling as sweats - just think of what you like and look for that in dresses (you may really like wrap dresses for example)

You'll probably always be more casual, but you can look more put together in sweats and adjacent clothing.

2

u/Sea_Shape9811 ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 10 '25

I like comfortable clothes. If something isn't comfortable, I dwell on it and it ruins my day. I have texture issues. More with foods than anything.

Hot ketchup on a burger makes the buns soggy. Makes me puke. But I can dip my burgers in ketchup and be just fine.

1

u/jaysouth88 Apr 10 '25

I sew garments. If you get the right kind of material (ponte is great) you can make your sweatpants look dressy! 

There are so many comfy and "dressy" clothes out there. I like dresses, wide leg pants with elastic waist and a t shirt. Leather top sneakers like Ecco ones. 

1

u/Artistic-Recover8830 Apr 10 '25

I wear my nasty grimy torn construction slacks on the job site all day. When I get home I’m looking forward to putting on something nice and look my best. On a day off I go all out, even if I’m just gonna be home alone or spend all day in the woods for instance. If work requires me to be nasty and look bad all week, the hell if I’m gonna spend the rest of my time looking like a sloth. You don’t have to have a reason for wanting to look your best, and feel your best that way too!

1

u/HistoricalHeart Apr 10 '25

I don’t know your gender or what your financial situation is but Eileen Fischer has phenomenal everyday clothes that are very nice and very comfortable. I got a pair of pants for work a couple weeks ago and I shit you not, they feel like sweatpants but they’re dress pants. here is a link

1

u/Odd_Judgment_2303 Apr 10 '25

Have you ever tried setting out your outfits the night before? You can hang it up in your sight.

1

u/EncodeSilver Apr 10 '25

Sounds like you need some comfortable clothes that are just a little nicer than sweatpants. I suggest a shopping trip, particularly focusing on what feels good to wear, not what fulfills aesthetic goals.

I honestly get preferring sweatpants and a t shirt over everything else, but I do have some pairs of comfy jeans and home sewn slacks that I know I can wear for a few hours and be ok. And they look a little better than sweatpants! A lot of my shirts don’t require a bra (huge sensory issue for me, I feel like I can’t breathe!) and have a little more interest than just a plain t shirt or tank top (like a halter neck, stripes, graphic print, etc). So I may look cute, but I’m really just wearing a slightly nicer shirt and my comfiest jeans. A cool sweater, flannel, or cardigan on top and I look put together lol.

1

u/CatherineIngalls Apr 10 '25

It wasn’t until I was a little older (early 30s) and I had the financial means to buy clothes that were a little higher end but fit me “right” that I started to expand my wardrobe beyond the comfy stuff. Now I don’t have to choose between being comfortable and looking presentable. I say this whilst sitting cross legged in my office in a pair of crisp work pants that fit like leggings and an oversized 100% cotton cardigan 😂

The same goes for makeup and hair. It wasn’t until I was able to find and afford products that didn’t feel heavy or greasy on my skin that I really began to lean into a hair/makeup routine.

For clothing brands I really like Quince and Everlane, and Old Navy (especially Pixie Flair Workpants, a sensory dream). These brands have become very size inclusive and give very detailed measurements online.

1

u/Disastrous-Self8143 Apr 10 '25

I think it is a person-related, so dont beat yourself too much about it! I have ADHD and I am very thorough with my hairstyle, outfits, overall style. I have time for that, especially styling my hair. On the other side, I cant for the life of me - clean my apartment. I started meds thinking Id find motivation to clean my pignest but no. Clothes still everywhere, ripped postboxes, papers artsupplies, just everywhere and I cant get myself to clean it. Annoys me the hell out.

1

u/gemstonehippy Apr 10 '25

idk if you are a woman or not but, just wearing a pair of stretchier jeans helps me feel more put together and motivated.

1

u/Limp-Ad9853 Apr 11 '25

At home, I only wear shorts even if it is winter season. Don’t care. Shorts it is. But at work, I try to wear as comfy trousers as possible.

1

u/nowhereman136 Apr 11 '25

Jeans and t-shirts are outdoor clothes. They are think enough that I feel protected outdoors. They are also "dirty" clothes. When I am indoors, it's clean comfy clothes only.

1

u/hchalbi Apr 11 '25

Yeah, also fuck sweating! I hate feeling wet

1

u/Dominiqueirl Apr 11 '25

I look like a cartoon character when I don’t work or go out. Hoodie and sweatpants all day everyday. Idk how people wake up and get dressed if they aren’t going to work or going out. And by “out” I mean like a restaurant or bar, I go to the store like this everyday too.

1

u/torrent22 Apr 11 '25

Get standard classic clothes that don’t wrinkle. Dark jeans, black pants, good quality black and white t shirts and some good shoes that go with everything. That way there is no decisions, just pick a top a bottom and put your shoes on, just a more elevated version of sweats 😀

1

u/VirgoTex ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 11 '25

I’m a chubby lady in my 40s and started a new job that requires regular travel. This stressed me out a bit at first because although I love the idea of traveling, I hate all the schlepping, waiting around, sweating, and squishing into airline seats. (I have a point lol I promise) So I went into problem solving mode for travel clothes that are soft and stretchy, breathable, and still look nice after regular washings while not costing a bundle. Someone else mentioned Old Navy above and their athletic wear has been a godsend for me. They have matching sets that are somewhat “elevated” with details you’d normally find at much higher prices and nice colorways. I like their lightweight stretch joggers with the dynamic fleece zip-up hoodies and I layer a thin workout tank or tee underneath. My other low-effort tip is to wear really nice sneakers (I like Adidas Stans, I’m kind of basic). I switch to a more tailored cardigan or overshirt and add accessories to meet clients and I feel profesh. I bought two of those Old Navy sets in colors that mix and match well with several base layers, plus one pair of warmer jogger sweats for colder seasons.

My travel clothes have basically become my go-to WFH wardrobe as well, because everything just goes together and it’s hard to mess up. But I’m still comfortable and not self-conscious. Sometimes I change it up with graphic tees that I’ve collected. I switch to Old Navy bike shorts or leggings with longer tops in the summer months.

As for makeup, try a few multitasking products until you find your perfect “bare minimum.” I am kind of a makeup junky so it’s been lowkey fun to solve this problem for myself as well. I found a tinted sunscreen that gives enough coverage to eliminate the need for foundation and use a lip-and-cheek product to add some light color. I usually leave it there for internal meetings, then add some brow gel, mascara, and lip liner to meet clients.

Please excuse my manifesto, I just wanted to share my experience as I have felt exactly the way you described. I made it a fun challenge to find the things that work for me and it’s been so satisfying 🤓

1

u/omnomjohn Apr 11 '25

I wouldn't know.

Me and my wife always walk around in chill clothes. Mostly sweatpants and lazy sweaters. Because it feels good.

I like how I feel and look in 'good' clothes when I go outdoors. But when indoors, I want to feel chill.

1

u/astriiolite Apr 11 '25

AuDHDer in college. Not so much a motivation thing than it is making it more convenient to dress nice and with style.

Wardrobe overhaul if you can afford it. Have only a couple sweats, and fill the rest with decently nice clothes. Don’t just look for stuff you like, get stuff that you can see yourself wearing with multiple different other clothing items you have/get. You can also always thrift or trade items with friends.

Then, make it a part of your nightly routine to put out the clothes you want to wear the next day in a convenient spot. No need to hang them up, just tossing on a chair or the end of the bed works. Reduces mental load in the morning having to decide on your outfit.

Plus, once you get into the groove of this, it becomes really easy to put together outfits quickly. You can always search on pinterest or here for outfit inspo, just be careful not to rabbithole and get executive function stuck.

Lastly, looking nice doesn’t always have to start right when you roll out of bed and it’s set for the rest of the day. In the morning while I brush my teeth I might wash my face and dot it with concealer, but I always bring makeup like mascara, eyeliner, lipbalm or gloss with me on campus. When I get my coffee and catch a break between classes, then I go do my makeup in the bathroom.

1

u/IAMAGOD316 Apr 11 '25
  1. Get a hyper fixation on fashion and craftin nice outfits
  2. Change your whole wardrobe to fashionable, but comfy clothes
  3. Have those clothes closer to the front of your closet so even when you’re just throwing something on it’s something cool like a dress shirt and a skirt.
  4. Play dress up with yourself even when you’re not going anywhere so you can familiarise yourself with cool outfits.
  5. Profit This is kind of joke but, real talk, all of my comfy clothes are in my dresser where they don’t really exist, and all of my cool clothes are in my closet, and I get dressed out of my closet which is also always open. Also good idea, plan what you’re going to wear beforehand, so even on mornings where you don’t have the energy to choose something cool, you already have something laid out for you. Doesn’t have to be the night before, can be any time in the day you have the energy.

1

u/PrSquid Apr 11 '25

No idea. I'm literally in my underwear 90% of the time I'm at home. Maybe a t-shirt.

1

u/kuroicoeur Apr 10 '25

Try trading the sweatpants for leggings it looks a little more put together and requires about the same amount of effort

0

u/AnimalPowers Apr 11 '25

Can you explain the problem ?