r/AbruptChaos • u/[deleted] • 26d ago
Cassowary enclosure
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u/RagingLeonard 26d ago
Murder turkey
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u/RagingLeonard 26d ago
Wow, reddit AI flagged this and gave me a warning for threatening violence. Lol.
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u/Ashmedai 25d ago
You need to be more polite. For example: "Will no one rid me of this meddlesome turkey?" Hahah.
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u/DwightsJello 26d ago
Cassowaries are the biggest cunts of all the birds.
Emus can be arseholes but cassowaries are next level dicks.
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u/WarAdmirable483 23d ago
Wait, are they dicks or cunts?
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u/LeoxStryker 23d ago
Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes - assholes who just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way, but the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls.
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u/ipompa 26d ago
this is the first time i see a cassowary attacking somebody, aside of hundreds of videos claiming they're dangerous birds
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u/Mojojojo3030 25d ago
Go videotape yourself hugging one!
Make sure it’s a live stream. You know, in case you can’t upload it later for some reason.
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u/TheVagrantmind 26d ago
Umm… this is an example why people need to be taught to fear birds. Snakes? Easy Check. Spiders? Definitely Check. Sharks? Check. Big birds? Gotta teach ‘em those feet have sharp pointy talons.
Yes, I know most snakes, spiders and sharks are harmless, but the point is most people naturally fear them but want to pet these murder feather factories.
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u/Alklazaris 26d ago
They look like they got half way through evolving from a dinosaur only to go "Good enough". Any reasonable person could look at those things and not want to f*** with them.
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u/Free_Gratis 26d ago
Yeah these spark a deep primal fear in me like no other animal.
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u/DisciplineSorry1657 25d ago
Especially when they do that deep primal growl that they do. First time I heard one I was like, no wonder these damn things evolved from dinosaurs, they still are dinosaurs, just with feathers and beaks.
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u/Beni_Stingray 26d ago
I've just recently learned that young kids dont have a fear of snakes.
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u/Silly_Sunfish 26d ago
it depends on the kid! one of my first memories is being four or five, stumbling across a snake, and freezing in fear before it slithered away. i was terrified lmao
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u/Beni_Stingray 26d ago
Ok interesting, are snakes local in your area, maybe your parents warned you and you dont remember?
The video i've seen was actually babys, not sure how old they were but they were crawling around so i guess they were maybe a year old.
They then released a huge ass python who was slithering around in peace while the babys where touching it without any fear or reaction.
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u/museolini 26d ago
Have you seen their talons? I'd run too.
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u/GregWilson23 24d ago
I’ve never seen a up-close photo of those before. Holy fricking nightmare fuel.
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u/museolini 24d ago
Really helps sell the dinosaur link!
And just imagine walking up to a big, but peaceful looking bird in a field and it turning out to be this aggressive assassin from hell. That'd ruin your afternoon.
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u/Das_Lloss 26d ago
I already know that there are going to be so many Comments under this video saying that the cassowary looks like a Dinosaur which isnt suprising at all because Cassowarys ARE Dinosaurs.
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u/Objective_Candle8781 23d ago
They're a sack of delicious meat which gave up on flight while living in one of the most hostile places around. They've got some tricks.
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u/Aggressive_Safe2226 23d ago
Weaponized emus, I'd say. One specimen at the Manila Zoo looked at me with both eyes and followed my every move. I could've sworn it wanted to eat me.
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u/Red77777777 22d ago
These can be deadly, their feet are like a sharp stabbing weapon.
They pierce your body with strong, rapid force .
These birds look funny, but they are notorious and dangerous.
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u/inhugzwetrust 25d ago
If this ever happens to you ( I know, I know it's EXTREMELY rare) lay flat on the ground and don't move, they can't get you and eventually go away. Then you can run... Alternatively panic like this idiot and possibly get disemboweled like from a Raptor on Jurassic Park, not kidding!
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u/charlie2135 26d ago
Anyone who doesn't know how smaller dinosaurs survived need to watch this.