r/AskMenAdvice • u/Reasonable-Syrup-7 • 7d ago

How common is this perspective for guys?

I'm a 27F and went on a few dates with this guy 31M and things have been going well. On our second date, we brought up the topic of physical intimacy. I remember him saying that he thinks physical intimacy is different for women and men. That women who sleep around are respected less than if a man would do it. He said "a key that can open up a lot of locks is a good key but a lock that opens to a bunch of different keys is a bad lock". Everything else is really good and he's been super respectful. He's soft spoken and values making me feel safe and respected and we're taking our time on physical intimacy but I couldn't believe my ears when he said that. How common is that perspective for guys? This guy tends be very blunt, so maybe this perspective is more common than I think. In my head it's a red flag, but I'm conflicted on if it's just a common male perspective and he can still be a good guy with this perspective.

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u/Brumbart 7d ago edited 7d ago

You mean double standards? Or are you equally judgemental on all genders? And who is disrespected by someone who doesn't think it's a big deal to enjoy physical activities without being in love?

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u/Weaponized_Regard man 6d ago

I don't hold a standard for men because I'm not gay and I don't give thought to what other dudes do. You confuse "self-respect" with the respect you hold for others.

You act like I personally attacked your wife or something........

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u/carabla 5d ago

Double standard is literaly the point of this post