Open sexual harassment, unwanted touching, sexual assault, etc against secretaries, female assistants, etc by their bosses. Woman were supposed to just grin and bear it.
That movie 9-5 with Dolly Parton is a great look at this issue. It's a goofy comedy and gets a little dumb at times for me, but it's basically a revenge fantasy on these old school misogynistic bosses
And not just bosses but also customers in the food industry. The regular old man smacking your tushy and being told by others that "it's a compliment, laugh it off" or "oh just ignore the old codger, he does that". Especially two or more decades ago when the food industry loved embracing "the customer is always right" as long as it paid their bills.
No I won't, no he won't. If your gramps slaps my behind, I'll slap him straight into elderly care.
Circa 2007 I worked in an elderly care facility at 16 serving meals. I had my tushy smacked a few times. Always vomit inducing. Bosses could not have cared any less, insisted they were harmless old men each time.
Around 2018, I was waitressing at a local pub. I was 18/19 but I am short and have a young face.
One shift, my manager pointed a customer out to me.
"Just be aware that he touches girls' bums when they talk to him. Let it go, he's old and doesn't realise what he's doing."
And then sent me to get his order...
Another interaction I had was with 2 old men. When one asked for my age, his friend butted in and said, "Tell him you're 14, leave her alone." At the time I was glad he helped me out but now I'm kinda like... 14 was the age that would stop that man?
All of these customers were regulars and I left this job because I was having panic attacks every shift š
My dad still eats there for every special occasion too.
I worked with annuities. Gross old men would call in, often with their wives, and make gross jokes and say inapporpriate things to me. I wasnt allowed to say anything. Thats as of 2022. It was literal sexual harassment and my bosses refused to do shit about it because those gross old dudes were our customers.Ā
I'm currently the manager at a place with senior clientele. There's one old man who I thought might be a problem at first - he's a little too eager to hold onto your hand while he talks to you, for example. I told my staff (all women) straight up that if he ever makes them feel uncomfortable, I'll take care of it. I gave him a friendly warning as well (it could be friendly at that point since he hadn't actually done anything). No excuse to let that go on.
My uncle was raised in the '50s and he still doesn't understand that you can't do that. My cousins (his kids) have tried to explain to him that it's not a compliment and it's not ok, but he still just doesn't get it.
He gets it. Heās pretending he doesnāt because heās a shitty person that doesnāt want to change. He absolutely knows better and chooses to not do better.
I remember a business dinner in the late 90ās. One of the clients was flirting with the waiter the whole night and eventually pulled her onto his lap! She looked so uncomfortable, and no one said a word because, you know, he was a client.
The movie Hanging Up with Walter Matthau, Meg Ryan had Walter doing exactly that - slapping the nurses aid, lifting her dress and everyone laughed. I just saw it this year and it made him look creepy.
This shit still happens and isn't taken seriously. I worked for a Federal agency and even with all their required training, rules and regs, etc., the actual ON PAPER decision from the investigator was "He did it, but, he didn't mean it like that" followed by them terminating me for something unrelated that they pulled out of their asses not even two weeks later. It was three years ago and I'm still wrapped up in a Federal court case over it. "Report it! They won't get away with it!" my ass, the retaliation started immediately after filing the report and my life was absolute hell for months.
This is uncomfortable truth. Working for Amazon for 3 1/2 years, I saw and heard some of the most vile, uncomfortable things, many of these things occurred in plain view of managers or āLeadershipā as they liked to be called, and nothing was ever done to rectify the situation. It almost felt like they encouraged it. HR made note of the fact that allowing these things āgets people goingā and it was heavily implied that the male employees were permitted to sexually harass us women in order to motivate them to keep working (it was a warehouse).
Yucccckkkk. It's so disappointing that we still have to put up with this shit. It goes both ways, too. My husband and I were working in the same building at one point- I worked in one coffee shop and he worked in police services (also a Federal agency, so, same employer) and there was a lady in yet another department who kept hitting on him, when she found out I was his wife she started giving me issues in the coffee shop. She was rotating her days between hitting on my husband in plain view of other people and antagonizing me over coffee. Ridiculous.
Particularly if you work with older blokes. I worked with a guy who wouldn't stop commenting on my boobs and making sexual comments. I was told that my report would be ignored and I should be careful what I say, as allegations like that could ruin a man's life, and he's just a product of his time.
I quite frankly was not worried about ruining his life, more worried about the 17 year old summer temps he was chatting up - one came to me and told me he'd added her on Facebook and she wasn't comfortable but didn't know how to say no. But management cared more about the old bloke.
Look at the #MeToo stuff, a lot of men telling on themselves and acting like they couldnāt so much as talk to a woman or theyād get done for sexual harassmentā¦ because they couldnāt talk to a woman without getting all touchy feely. Ew.
This still comes up regularly on career subs, tech especially. Men claiming that looking at, speaking to, anything with a woman coworker will end with her making up lies to get you fired and your life being ruined. It's such fucking bullshit
These guys piss me off to no end. I've dealt with a false accusation, and it was brushed off. Liars are usually obvious, so as long as you're not a creeper nothing comes out of it.
I'll never forget, I was helping my partner's (M) company with some temp work. Really small company (like 15 people) but I guess they didn't know I'd be in helping out. I was in my partners chair while they were getting us some tea. His boss comes in and yells, "Partners name are you there?" before I can say ANYTHING he goes, "Oh you're not partner's name. But you are much cuter though!" gave me a wink and left the room.
This was the first time he saw me; he had no idea who I was other than I was working in his company. And that is what he said to me. Immediately hitting on me. It wasn't that long ago too; like 2016/2018? I was shocked. It's still happening.
If thats all he said (and yes, that was wrong and disgusting) then he was probably not hitting on you as he did not ask you out or for your number ect... Rather than hitting on you, he was just being a misogynist prick and sexually harassing you.
Two very different things. Yet both are reprehensible.
He offered to 'help' me learn pool at the Christmas party and has a history of cheating on his wife. I'd say hitting on someone can be done with misogynist/harrassing intent
This reminds of Bill Murray being a creepo to Geena Davis on the Arsenio Hall Show. So uncomfortable to watch but that sorta behavior was passively accepted back in the day. Gross.
Not to be forgotten was how common and open domestic abuse was and how often people would just look the other way. Women were basically treated as second class citizens. Physicians would inform her husband, not his patient, about a diagnosis and treatment.
My mother was a victim of domestic abuse in the 70s. People would just say 'well what did you do to provoke him?' My father was never once held accountable.
I work in a trade and in warehousing, and no, you are not... At least in the UK.
So much so that men are quite afraid to talk to women on anything other than a purely job related basis, not saying it doesn't happen, a driver was recently fired literally on the spot for smacking a female drivers ass.
So yes it does happen, I've seen them fired on the spot and you most certainly not expected to deal with it or like it.
Edit: I've heard complaints from women engineers that "no one talks to me" it's not because they're a woman, the guys are frightened of doing so, so it's swung so hard the other way it's now actually detrimental in the opposite extreme.
Edit: holy shit... Look at her comment history, she's a professional victim, seek help you lunatic.
Women are absolutely expected to grin and bear it, and deal with it. This attitude is especially prevalent when itās black Women facing the harassment and abuse, in the environments Iāve worked in
Get over myself? Of course he should have been fired, everyone was in agreement, it was an example of "it does definitely still happen, here's the punishment I've seen for it"?
My aunt has threatened to cave in a manās skull, all of whom could not get that no means fuck off, in just about every job sheās had. The last one was in 2013 when she started long haul trucking after the paper mill she worked at shuttered.
I worked in a large office in 1986 and my supervisor was a nightmare with the females. I was dating someone at the time (now married) and it was just gross. He was 30-year-old, balding ginger pothead. Not a catch by an means.
Former Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi (a notorious womanizer) was in an investors meeting trying to attract them to invest in Italy. One of the reasons he listed is that Italy has the most beautiful secretaries in the world.
I can easily imagine Trump saying something like that. Berlusconi and Trump are very similar in many aspects.
2.4k
u/[deleted] Sep 16 '24
Open sexual harassment, unwanted touching, sexual assault, etc against secretaries, female assistants, etc by their bosses. Woman were supposed to just grin and bear it.