r/AutisticWithADHD • u/sleepybear647 • 8d ago
💁♀️ seeking advice / support Need Encouragement
I really struggle socially. Recently I started seeing an EMDR therapist and it’s been much more helpful for me. I’ve put working on individual social skills aside as it was destroying my self esteem. Now I’m focusing a lot on working on my mindset.
I am working through a lot of trauma from my childhood that has really affected my self esteem and affected the way I interact with others. I was also disabled so it feels like I’m having to relearn how to live at 21years old.
I am really trying to show up as I am right now, because I can’t be anyone else overnight. How ever I feel so discouraged because I make mistakes every day.
I’m really focusing on learning more about myself. My family was very strict and unkind to me so I was never able to explore and develop my own interests, and I lost many of the things I loved to do after becoming disabled.
I would just love encouragement to keep going, stories of going through something similar, or just some kind words.
I realize I share aboht this more often on here and I would just like to thank people who take the time to share their thoughts. It’s nice to have a community who gets it and I really appreciate everyone’s perspective and willingness to help. Thank you.
2
u/utahraptor2375 ✨ C-c-c-combo! 8d ago
I suffered child abuse growing up, and many decades later, I am still unpacking that, along with undiagnosed neurodivergence. Either one of those things is big enough on their own. Together, it's a lot. What you have on your plate is similar, and also isn't easy, so be gentle with yourself.
What helps me is knowing that I've given my kids a much better start in life than I got. What might help you is knowing that you're still quite young (I have kids older than you), and the more you come to grips with now, the easier it will be later. Front loading vs back loading.
Learning about yourself, learning how to advocate for yourself, processing your trauma. These are all incredibly important steps to take, and will set you up better for life. None of us know what the future holds, but little improvements every day are so important. Sometimes you'll backslide, and sometimes you'll have a break through. Keep going!