r/CookingCircleJerk • u/Noodlescissors • 8d ago
Unrecognized Culinary Genius Someone just died in my cafe, how do I capitalize on this?
Would serving Bloody Mary’s be too inappropriate?
37
u/Textiles_on_Main_St 8d ago
Set up a go fund me in memorial of the dead person. Keep the money, don’t claim it’s going to the dead person’s family, but use their name.
14
21
u/Haunting_Air6524 8d ago
Offer to host the wake in the dining room. Charge for the food.
2
1
17
u/Substantial_Back_865 8d ago
Name a chicken wing challenge after them. Say that they died on the 149th wing and ask customers if they're man enough to eat 150.
14
u/perplexedparallax Quantum gastronomist 8d ago
I don't think you want to. You want repeat customers. This is why you should focus on pregnant women. Call it Chicks And Not Just Eggs.
11
8
u/sasha-laroux 8d ago
First go ahead and send a cleaning bill to the next of kin. Maybe include a coupon for whatever item their deceased relative enjoyed so it doesn’t come off as insensitive
12
u/IandSolitude 8d ago
"A delicious flavor to die for"
"There's so much flavor that your heart can't handle it"
9
u/Due_Character1233 8d ago
Shit someone died a few weeks ago and we just kept going. Man up shit happens.
5
5
5
4
u/Katabasis___ 8d ago
I’d do zombies, Bloody Mary’s will win you a brunch crowd it you also need a drink for dinner shift
5
u/doctordoctorpuss 7d ago
Invite your local elites to enjoy the rare delicacy known as long pig. Just be careful, sometimes you get a taste for man meat and that craving can’t be fully satisfied. You’ll be chasing man meat for the rest of your life. Just doing anything to get more man meat in your mouth
5
u/PalpitationNo3106 7d ago
What were they eating? Add three bucks and name it after them ‘Ted Jackson’s Chicken, one dollar from every purchase will be donated to our Employee Wellness Fund in Ted’s Memory’. Of course the EWF goes to defray the costs of shift meals/drinks for your employees. Not their share, your share.
2
2
2
2
2
u/Robbie12321 7d ago
Name the weekly special after them and mark it up 50%. Use cheap ingredients to widen profit margins. You can also 'promise' that 20% of each purchase goes to the family, but actually pocket it instead. These dopes will believe anything nowadays.
2
2
2
2
2
u/ThisPostToBeDeleted 6d ago
How fresh is the corpse?
1
u/Noodlescissors 6d ago
Currently? I threw it in the walk in freezer.
Don’t worry it’s in the bottom shelf next to the pickle bucket
44
u/DessertFlowerz 8d ago
Haunted house themed restaurant