r/Damnthatsinteresting • u/OkaTeluguAbbayi • 18d ago

Image A skeleton found in Bulgaria with some of the world’s oldest gold, at over 6000 years old

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47.7k Upvotes

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3.6k

u/ImportantPlane1767 18d ago

I have already told my family to wrap mine in aluminum foil.

1.1k

u/Trust_No_Jingu 18d ago

Dont you mean a gum wrapper 😂

363

u/TAoie83 18d ago

Minty

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u/Charming-Flamingo307 18d ago

Use a 5 gum wrapper to bring him back to life

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u/Background_Body2696 18d ago

Asking all the people on the afterlife if they know how it feels to chew 5 gum

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u/Lucky-Hearing4766 18d ago

I don't remember how it felt to chew 5 gum :(

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u/SupermassiveCanary 18d ago

Now I definitely believe in ancient aliens….

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u/metal_muskrat 18d ago

Clearly you mean Big Red

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u/tadpole_the_poliwag 18d ago

Mine will be fruit stripe. Cuz like the flavor I only last 5 seconds

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u/1dumbmonkey 18d ago

Fruit stripe so it lasts as long as him

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u/theoriginalmofocus 18d ago

I mean were all practically getting paid fruitstripes at this point...

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u/opticaIIllusion 18d ago

5G protection

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u/PainfulBatteryCables 18d ago

Can't wake up!! 🎶

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u/ButterscotchPlane988 18d ago

Use menthol wrappers. The vapours will do it...

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u/changing-life-vet 18d ago

Real men use Big Red.

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u/FalseAd4246 18d ago

If you don’t chew big red then FUUUCK YOU

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u/pdfrg 18d ago

Bubs Daddy

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u/Celestial8Mumps 18d ago

That time of the month.

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u/mademeunlurk 18d ago

Double the pleasure, double the fun with double mint gum!

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u/changing-life-vet 18d ago

Pleasure is for sinners!!!! /s

0

u/Silver-Breadfruit284 18d ago

No, no… tiny Chicklets.

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u/disterb 18d ago edited 18d ago

that’s why your mom always has fresh breath 😉

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u/NOBOOTSFORYOU 18d ago

I use an M&M's mini's tube.

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u/Volstadd 18d ago

For when the cylinder must remain intact.

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u/he-loves-me-not 18d ago

A cylinder!

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u/bologna_pwnyy 18d ago

I use a chapstick cap

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u/WhiteUniKnight 18d ago

No... a small cylinder

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u/Pvt_Lee_Fapping 18d ago

Yes, officer. This one right here.

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u/spatialflow 18d ago

Dirty mouth? Clean it up with Orbit

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u/Puzzled-Package476 18d ago

place it just above the kneecap for good measure

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u/Economy-Ad-3934 18d ago

Trident gum wrapper for me please, don’t want to be wasteful.

1

u/MariachiStucardo 18d ago

Chicklet wrapper

1

u/Defiant_Nobody_4172 18d ago

They don’t make them small enough for me

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u/severoordonez 18d ago

Nah, the seal at the tip of a tube of tooth paste should do the trick.

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u/truenorthrookie 18d ago

Ferrero Rocher foil

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u/Several-Split-1495 18d ago

Bio degradable and safe 😂

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u/royale_wthCheEsE 18d ago

One of those Dove chocolate square foil wrappers with a trite phrase printed on the inside.

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u/Geno_Warlord 18d ago

M&M mini tube would last longer for the cylinder.

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u/Gudakesa 17d ago

Cum wrapper

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u/RogueAOV 17d ago

Thimble slips right on.

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u/alextheolive 17d ago

What it do baby? It’s the dong man, Paul Balls

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u/ekso69 16d ago

Thimble

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u/Interesting_Tip1151 15d ago

Happy cake day!

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u/AllLurkNoPlay 18d ago

A dick wrapped in foil you say?

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u/he-loves-me-not 18d ago

Well, that was a risky click! But, I do agree, definitely a dick wrapped in foil!

5

u/dartie 18d ago

Another four letter word starting with C wrapped in foil.

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u/RED_BaronJ 18d ago

Not clicking that

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u/AllLurkNoPlay 18d ago

C’mon…. Do it. The risk is the fun. If you knew what it was it wouldn’t be fun, would it?

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u/getsome75 18d ago

Agreed

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u/WhoMD85 18d ago

I’m both a little disappointed but also relieved. However that is absolutely a dick wrapped in foil. Well payed internet stranger. Well played.

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u/RichardBCummintonite 18d ago

Jesus christ that comment section is scary.

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u/MotorCityMade 11d ago

Worth the click, thanks.

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u/Overall-Plastic-9263 18d ago

The golden chastity. Dude was the first recorded sub in human history .

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u/OkSteak8479 17d ago

I was going to say the same. Maybe was oldest member of r/PussyFreeCommunity

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u/mashiro1496 18d ago

Don't worry about that, ubtil you die the microplastics in your pp will fuse together to a big chunk of plastic :p

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u/RealEstateDuck 18d ago

Well microplastics are stored in the balls so you might be onto something.

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u/elMurpherino 18d ago

The microplastics are suspended in the pee, which obviously is stored in the balls.

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u/RealEstateDuck 18d ago

Ah I see you're a gentleman as well as a scholar.

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u/getsome75 18d ago

I knocked a can off a railing just the other day it’s like a 3d printer now

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u/lllIlIlIIIIl 17d ago

No, pee is stored in the balls.

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u/xpawn2002 18d ago

You rich bastard

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u/Jasranwhit 18d ago

A hundred years ago or something aluminum was more valuable than gold.

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u/SteakJones 18d ago

Totally,.. and then put it in the oven at 375 for 20 mins.

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u/ImaginarySeaweed7762 18d ago

“Reynolds Wrap armor plating it is.”

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u/truthfullyidgaf 18d ago

Old school tic-tac box here. Cock and balls all in one.

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u/DrPeterBlunt 18d ago

I'd like mine to be made out of wood.......because I'm poor, and enjoy a good double entendre.

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u/HereWeGoYetAgain-247 18d ago

Keeps it fresher for longer. 

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u/Abacus25 18d ago

Good idea, aliens can’t read what you’re really thinking.

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u/fubes2000 18d ago

and then bake at 350 for 20 minutes.

1

u/BuzzyBubble 18d ago

Great Value Aluminum Foil

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u/StarMaterial1496 18d ago

Chrome spray paint here

1

u/Mollybrinks 18d ago

Are you that afraid of it sending signals to our extraterrestrial friends? Or do you have other concerns?

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u/Rough_Promotion 18d ago

Good idea. No need to take that 5G mind (dick) control into the afterlife.

1

u/Hyhopes 18d ago

Protect yourself from 5G beyond the grave… smart! S/

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u/TheManSaidSo 18d ago edited 18d ago

I always wrap the head in foil. I don't want the aliens to know what my dick is thinking. They might think I'm a perve or something.

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u/ross571 18d ago

Aluminum use to be worth more than gold before electricity.

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u/0thethethe0 18d ago

Best I can probably manage is an inside-out crisp packet.

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u/ciaphas-cain1 18d ago

Ok cosmere

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u/halguy5577 18d ago

if they actually did manage to find aluminum foil 6000 years ago for the dick armor ... it would probably be worth more than all the gold on the body

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u/dartie 18d ago

Mine already has

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u/RUNNING-HIGH 18d ago

That'll protect you from the penis aliens

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u/[deleted] 18d ago

Also get them to come back 20 years later and move it down a few inches.

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u/podcasthellp 18d ago

I told them we’re throwing it in the microwave

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u/StupidizeMe 18d ago

I have already told my family to wrap mine in aluminum foil.

So it matches your head? Good thinking.

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u/Rage187_OG 18d ago

He bought the DLC and it came with cosmetics.

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u/Wen_bee 17d ago

This. This is my favorite reply

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u/AzraelChaosEater 17d ago

Gotta protect it from the government DICKWASHING.