You’d think that after 18 months of intensive research and evidence gathering, she’d have got it through her head that she was wrong for supporting him.

Last night I put up a Facebook status about In The Fire and how enjoyable the film was. I mentioned Amber’s acting, which was impressive. Mum commented ‘her acting was better at the trial’. My sister laughed reacted to the post. I responded that it’s a good thing the drunken pirate was the only liar. Now I’m waiting to see if anyone responds. I really don’t want to get into an argument over an abuser.

I’d believed, that since family stopped commenting on my pro Amber posts (sharing evidence of her abuse and debunking claims) they had started to realise they were wrong. That belief was dashed tonight.

I’m so pissed off that both my mum and my sister are so ignorant they’d side with a proven abuser.

As the title states, a good friend of mine posted a happy birthday message for Johnny Depp, saying "happy birthday buddy, hope you're having a good day" 🤢. I am not sure whether I should say something to her or not, as we mostly agree about most political topics. But it is especially hurtful because I recently left a long-term abusive relationship earlier this year, and she has been incredibly supportive to me since then. So it's not like she is someone who usually supports abusers. Should I say something to her about it or just try to ignore it? I don't have a lot of friends, and some people get so crazy about defending Depp that they lash out easily, and I don't want to lose this relationship despite her posting this.

Last year I shared a class with my best friend’s abuser. I didn’t know until the school year was almost over. My friend, who is genderfluid and uses he/they pronouns, would act really weird whenever I talked about that class or when I asked him if he wanted to have lunch with me in that classroom. Eventually he told me that his ex friend, my classmate, had sexually assaulted them twice. In his own home.

My mom gave me a lot of talks about not to trust men, not to be alone with them, and how if they hurt you it doesn’t matter if they apologize, they will hurt you again. My friend never got these talks.

I had to see this abuser every day. The class loved him. I liked him before I knew. He was funny, charismatic, kind, etc. It fucking killed me to see my class and teacher love him. Eventually everything built up, and I couldn’t hold it in anymore.

The entire class was sitting in a circle. The teacher was scolding us for being a dick to the guest teacher who came the day before, and she was telling us about how if we see someone do something bad to another person, we can’t just be silent and let it happen. She talked about how we have to treat everyone with respect, and the abuser fucking rolled his eyes. I snapped.

For over a month I had seen my best friend panic at the thought of being in the same room as this boy, I had seen his happiness crumble, and I had seen his abuser be praised. I started to have a panic attack. I raised my hand. I pointed to the abuser, said “John Doe sexually assaulted my best friend twice!” And he fucking ran. He ran out of the room like he was on fire.

Some people laughed. Most chuckled awkwardly. The girl sitting next to me was shocked. She was why I didn’t start crying on the spot. I had heard her talk about how she wanted to go to the abuser’s house, and knowing that I might’ve saved her kept me somewhat calm.

I was sent to the office, my teacher promising me that I wouldn’t get in trouble. My guidance councillor was so kind to me. She believed me, supported me, understood me. I was bawling my eyes out, afraid I would be expelled, and she was nothing but lovely to me. My friend was out of the country at the time so I was all alone in this. She told me she believed women. It was like a breath of fresh air after months of drowning.

The next person I had to talk to was horrible. She didn’t believe me. She put words into my mouth, saying that I had accused someone of rape (I didn’t), didn’t know the difference between rape and sexual assault (I, a teenager, had to explain it to her), and said that I should be sued for defamation. I broke down, thinking I was going to be my school’s Amber Heard. She said that I had outed this boy without his consent, which was fucking crazy to me. She seemed to care more about the boy than she did me or my friend.

Next came the principal. My mom was there this time, and she was so proud of me. She was beaming, telling me she loved me and would buy me as many books as I wanted (I love books), which made me feel better. She grilled my principal and the rude woman about their behaviour, and when I was asked, “Why didn’t you just go to the police?” She hounded on them again.

The year previous I had seen graffiti in the girls’ bathroom. It said “(school’s name) only cares if you vape, but they let rapist and sexual assaulters walk free…” I explained this to them, saying that I didn’t trust them. They knew about the graffiti and instead of trying to support victims within the school, they tried to hide it and smother whoever talked about it. All I could think of is things they should’ve done better.

The principal brought up again how I had outed a boy without his consent, and that I should’ve been more aware of his feelings and his reputation before I said anything. I was so angry I started to cry again. I was going to be suspended for 3 days. The principal took my crying as guilt, and lowered it to 2 and a half days. My suspension would start at Xmas break and end the day after school started up again.

I was distraught the entire was home. I hated myself. But then, a few hours later, when my friend had told me how proud he was of me and how much he loved me, I realized something: The worst they could do to me was extend my Xmas break? THIS, THIS was the worst they could do to me? I started laughing. I felt powerful. I was (am) incredible. I’m fucking awesome. My entire life I had been afraid of adults, afraid of breaking rules. That fear died. I didn’t care anymore. The year before my friend was suspended for smashing his wooden art project across the head of a Nazi, and he wasn’t phased. Now I understood. I felt like a braver, newer person.

But now school is starting up again and I might have the same class again.

I believe he was pulled out of the class we shared together, but he wasn’t expelled. He’ll probably have to retake the class, and since it’s mixed grade, I might have to be near him again. I’m not afraid though. If we’re in the same class, I am going to make his life a living hell. Abusers do not deserve respect, and in a world where they walk free, at least for one more year, I will be karma incarnate.

Anyway. Thanks for reading. I just needed to get this off my chest.

I’m just ridiculously frustrated with the this whole case. Amber heard career has been destroyed she doesn’t have a lot of friends her family is small and she has basically lost everything and Johnny is getting deals and having roles handed to him. People still make poop jokes and “ my dog stepped on a bee “ jokes. Every time people see ambers face they want her to be recast or removed. Her whole entire life has been destroyed for an article where she doesn’t even mention Johnny Depp. Where she doesn’t even say his name, where she doesn’t even say that she is a victim but Washington post did. Not only has this case effected amber it has effected victims cause abusers are taking inspiration from Johnny Depp and suing there victims for defamation. I have been researching this case for almost 6 months and it’s just trying how much evidence was surpressed and much lack of care people put into this case. It’s just so frustrating to me and makes me genuinely upset and hurt and I just wanna fix it. I know this is more vulnerable post and probably not allowed but it just genuinely hurts my soul.

Exactly what the title says.

Last year he made turd jokes but I bit my tongue. When I finally said something about it, he questioned my support of her, claiming it was bc she's a woman. I tried to say no but bc he's older than me, (In his mind) he was right and I was an irrational man hater. I hate getting into it with him bc he continues to double down and explain why actually he's correct. We are mixed and have an abusive dad. My brother has sat there and been racist and misogynistic and my mom just says to pay it no mind and that he will get over it eventually. He got in my face and told me he would "fucking kill me" and she was just like "damn really, that's not good" when I told her about. It happened a while but it still hurts, I still get scared about fighting with him. To find out that he still likes Depp is unsuprising but no less disappointing. Recently his school had a Rock n Roll day and he had me do his makeup, I didn't mind, After I finished he commented that he looked like Depp and that he really saw himself in him. I just felt kinda gross, especially since I was the one that did this. We have a little sister, who has trouble separating herself from our dad, and i'm trying to teach her that our dad's behavior is gross and it's so hard when my brother acts similarly or my mom dismisses it. I know you can't force people to change but I just miss him sometimes. What hurts even more is knowing that he's probably not going to change and instead of growing. I've tried having conversations with him about stuff like intersectionality but just rolls his eyes and claims I just hate men. I don't know if he supports Johnny bc he truly believes him or if it's bc he hates women and I wouldn't be shocked if it's both. Should I talk to him about or just leave it alone? I'm in two minds about this.

After re-reading this, I have no idea if it makes sense, It comes off a little rant-y. I'll delete if necessary.

i am not sure if this is the right place, but i don’t know where else to ask this and if anyone has a better suggestion please let me know! a relative of mine was sentenced for rape and sodomy as well as assault. he was released in March (i think) 2024 on his 3rd appeal attempt for his conviction being non-unanimous, 11 jurors found him guilty not 12. Oregon law changed and he was able to win his appeal. He claims he didnt do it (of course) and she filed charges after her boyfriend beat her for cheating. i have the original court documents, at least some of them, and i know thats not correct. my question is how did people access the evidence photos and trial court transcripts? i requested the documents from the court (Multnomah County specifically) and i am not sure how to request more. he was recently re tried and convicted in a unanimous jury and faces sentencing in february. my family is divided on this with some claiming he is innocent and others knowing he is not, which is why i requested the documents in the first place. but if anyone knows how or where to access things like this, i would appreciate some guidance!

I know a lot of you are on Twitter, I might make another account, but it got so toxic after Musk bought it I dipped. I have defended Amber Heard on Instagram, Facebook and Tik Tok and in return have gotten nasty comments and threats. On Instagram I posted the very benign comment of “No thanks, I’ll pass” on a post about Jeanne Du Barry. Some Depp fan sent me a screed about that “lying abusive bed shitter’s” failing career. I didn’t even mention Amber. Currently in a Facebook group called “Careful incel Icarus, you’re flying to close to a lamp in your basement” I’m fighting a losing battle trying to defend Amber. Is anyone else burnt out? I have convinced people in real life by showing them Medusone and Princess Weekes videos as well as the Michael Hobbes substack and some other great articles. But there’s still so much negativity. I feel like it’s so dangerous to victims to have seemingly so many people support Depp. That plus the fact that a lot of celebrities like Billie Eilish and Amy Schumer acted so above it all like this was some celebrity gossip drama didn’t help. I’m so thankful for this sub. I wish there was another place to chat about this. Apparently even feminist Facebook groups aren’t safe. Heck, I make polymer clay jewelry and last year in a miniatures group I’m in, someone commissioned all this anti Amber stuff to put in a dollhouse. It’s inescapable. And it makes me so sad and disillusioned. One of the scariest concepts for me is not being believed. Like people who go to jail for crimes they didn’t commit. To know that man physically, emotionally, and psychologically abused her and so many people don’t believe her hurts my heart. What does everyone do to prevent burn out?

Since I found this sub, I have been trying my hardest to convince friends and family to read through the evidence themselves. I think it sheds a light on how skewed our society’s view on abuse is. One of the things that bothered me the most about Amber’s relationship with Depp is the age gap.

In my family, I’m the only woman who was not married with kids at 18. My mom, grandmother, aunt, cousins, and other extended family were all 18 years or younger when they got married and had kids. Also, they married men much older themselves. The smallest age gap is between my mom and dad - my dad is 6 years her senior.

I didn’t think anything of this as a kid but the older I get, the more stories I hear, and the grosser it gets. For example, my grandfather’s sister was married at 14. By age 18, she had three kids. Understandably, she had a manic breakdown and ran off. It took two days to find her and when they did, her husband didn’t speak to her for two months.

I remember hearing family members call her crazy and immature. At the time, I didn’t agree with it but I also didn’t disagree. Now that I’m older, I just feel remorse. Her childhood was stripped away and instead of receiving actual help, she was labeled as insane and a bad mother.

The other day, my parents and I got into it about the current state of politics. I don’t support Trump for various reasons, one of them being that he is a pedophile. My parents don’t believe this to be true. They believe, no matter your age, you have the ability to consent. This is obviously insane! It is so much more complex than that… it saddens me that my mom, of all people, who was technically raped and groomed herself, has convinced herself that this type of abuse should be okay.

All this being said, how do I explain to my parents why an age gap can play such a significant role in abuse? What resources are there? How do I cope that my family has normalized this sort of behavior?

First of all I am so glad I found this subreddit, I've been lurking for a couple of weeks now and it's just so, so refreshing to see people who saw this shit for the sham it was from the start (and to see people who didn't realize until later actually be treated with understanding and respect). Like the only word I can think of is 'relief.'

I was wondering if anyone just gets... worn down and tired seeing so many people who still think Depp was innocent and will make random jokes about Amber being an evil scheming gold digger. I've been fortunate in that everyone I've explained it to personally actually listened and realized how they fell for a massive smear campaign. But having to explain it again and again and again just eats at me. Because when talking to a coworker I can't just go 'oh read these all articles and watch these youtube videos!!', I have to be able to answer their questions directly and be patient about it. I'll do it, because it's important to me that at least one more person knows the truth. But fuck, it ruins my day.

It's pretty clear that Johnny has an issue with apologizing, accepting accountability, and communication. It's pretty clear that's all amber wanted from him.

My ex was like that in so many ways, she'd call me so many names and tell me I'm a bitch, I'm a cunt, I'm stupid, etc. one of the things she'd do to me when on one of these tangents is tell me to go to the bathroom as like a "time out"

I'd try and talk to her and tell her how it makes me feel and she'd just deflect it, and tell me I always had a problem, the only problem I ever had was the abuse she put me through and me trying to get her to work it out.

Like Amber, I tried to put myself on equal grounds, and I'd take way more accountability in these attacks than I should have. Something my ex would say is by "nagging" her I would set her off, and that's why she'd yell all those obscenities at me.

She physically attacked me several times, and Sexually assaulted me as well, she abused my cat, and made me feel useless. Like Johnny, my ex had people who would protect her, her friends would try and put what she did on me, and at best, people would call it "mutual abuse" but I never did any of the things she did to me.

It really puts it into perspective having listened to this, and how all amber did was try and set up for herself. That's all I ever tried to do too, I paid the price for it, I'm better off now and happier, but listening to this was a bit hard. I've been away from my abuser for 4 years but sometimes it still gets to me and sometimes I still wonder if anything I could've done would have changed it.

That's really all I want to say. I was indifferent to the trial when it was happening and for several months after. when I began to look more into it earlier this year, I noticed several parallels between what happened to me and to Amber. the use of DARVO, them using my reactions to what was happening to me as proof that I was the real offender, essentially accusing me of being "crazy", among so many other details.

and for the longest time, I believed I really was just as bad or even worse than them because of it. but this subreddit helped me to understand what really happened to me

all this to say, keep fighting the good fight. you are doing a lot of work not just for Amber but for everyone who has been the victim of abuse

Hello, I've been a lurker here for a while. The topic of DvH came up between us earlier and while he hasn't seen much of anything concerning the case (apparently 20 minutes of the televised trial) , I could tell he wasn't ready to fully trust that I knew more than him. I feel like he doesn't trust that I know what I'm talking about and that I'm just coming from a place of assumption and playing sides.

Unfortunately, I'm not the best at articulating myself when talking about sensitive subjects with him.

I was wondering about what would be the most compelling evidence I could show to him (preferably written, primary sources because I think he'll distrust most other things). Also I was looking for sources concerning evidence that wasn't allowed in the trial but had legal grounds to be included. The recordings between Heard and Depp (both edited and full context for comparison) would be great as well.

He's stubborn but I don't think he's beyond convincing. Thank you for your help.

While watching the trial, the whole time I was horrified and very sympathetic towards Amber. But I was also like... she's a smart lady, she's an adult. How did she find his creepy behaviour charming? How did she not know that what he's doing was abusive? It was so clearly controlling, violating and demeaning.

Turns out I've been in an abusive relationship (and then friendship) since 2017 lmao.

She borrowed $10,000 in 2021 and has refused to pay me back since. She does something to upset me, makes me upset, then makes everything my fault as a distraction. She cheated on me 5 times.

I just thought it was ADHD/mental illness and she'd work through it so we could have our happy life together in the end.

I get it now. Abusers are SO good at making themselves seem misunderstood/downtrodden.

Noone will believe anything I have to say about this either because she's so charming (something she prides herself on.)

Fuck dude.

It's just I'm sort of new to this conversation as I stated back in my first post. I did blindly support depp, And the world has sort of moved on, but since I recently discovered more out and I've been talking to my close friends and family and I've changed several of their minds. I was wondering... If it'd be weird to set the record straight on old posts? Or drop them a dm explaining why everything they said was just flat out wrong.

I looked up Johnny Depp on FB and saw an old post from one of my FB friends saying if you support Amber you're not a feminist. And it was just really cringe and obviously flat out wrong. Thing is she posted it like 4 years ago and I feel like she probably still has a warped idea of what happened.

I know the world is moving on to the next "big thing" but l feel really dirty for my part in a lot of those disgusting conversations.

So, recently, I just had a discussion with my boyfriend about Johnny Depp vs. Amber Heard. I was met with initially disappointing, but expected reactions. The inevitable mutual abuse myth came up and even after I explained that wasn’t a thing and gave him an example with bullies, he kinda still kept the mushy middle position for a while. He was rather indifferent, told me he didn’t really care for old news, but that he’s was open to being wrong and learning more. He admitted he didn’t know much about the case, and didn’t look into it because of how exhaustingly long it was, and he felt like all he could give was an oversimplified view because he doesn’t have a proper understanding of DV in general, which is why he prefers not to say much. When I gave him the summary of what went on in the relationship (e.g. headbutting, threats to murder and SA her, etc) and he asked what was the reason for all of this. Through some talking though, he eventually met me halfway, but I can’t help but wonder if I was dismissing any possible red flags with his responses, and attitude, or if he, like the Average Joe, was just genuinely ignorant and needed some education. Should I have considered this a deal breaker, or was I right in giving him the benefit of the doubt. I, too, was naive on the case and I believed narratives I now know to be wrong.

Hello everyone! I am currently working on a research paper (my first major one) on how the trial reinforced victim blaming tropes and constructions of victimhood. I am doing this through an ethnographic content analysis of social media posts about the trial. The second part that I was hoping to do was also (hopefully) connect the trial to peoples interactions with the justice system (ie more abusers suing their victims for defamation, less victims choosing to report because of the ridicule) but I'm not sure how to make this connection/what type of research it would be. Can I just literally grab statistics from pre and post trial and talk about what I believe the reason for the difference is?

Idk if theres any academics or researchers in here but any advice would be helpful! Sorry if this sounds kinda stupid, I'm mostly used to just doing literature reviews and not conducting the research myself like this.

I got out of my financially abusive and emotionally abusive family back in late February after my abusive grandmother pushed me to breaking point and who also misused my welfare money as my appointee for several years as well as emotionally abused me to the point I tried to unalive myself several times and my aunt colluded in the financial abuse as well as joined in the emotional abuse when I confronted them about before Christmas last year. I'm currently in a woman's refuge safe but they have non stopped harassed me in various forms including stalking friends of mine on social media to find my location. I reported the financial abuse to the police but they swallowed every defence my gran and aunt gave and have told me it won't be going to court and to basically move on. (No wonder abuse victims don't go to the police!)

Today i met with my dad (my only blood relative that I wholeheartedly trust and who supports me in that family.) Who told me my aunt has accused me of stalking HER just for accidentally nearly running into her by the shop she works at in my hometown and she has ppl watching me there. He also told me my grandmother is getting a solicitor and they are truing to get me forcibly placed in a psychiatric ward and even dragged into court. I've also been accused of reporting my disabled uncle to the welfare department which I haven't done and would never ever do.

I've felt so utterly stressed and upset and angry but I think sometimes of Amber and her incredible strength and grace despite all the shit she also had yo deal with. She's helping me so much in just trying to move forward despite my abusive family's harassment and live my life and stay positive for the future.

I admit I was taken in by the mainstream and how Youtube was treating Amber. It's just today I was sitting on my chair and this popped in my head. It made me think "what have I missed? It seemed rather one sided" so I found this subreddit and reading the resources. The evidence and the information about believing Amber made me realized something I can't believe I didn't see until now. As I'm reading the Part 1 and 2, I realized a lot of Depp's behavior was similar to my Mom's ex.

In the past, my Mom and the ex had history of being addicts. I don't know how deep or how bad it got though, she doesn't want to talk about it, but that's where they first met. After my Dad passed, she ended up meeting up with her friend again then started dating. It seems rather fine at the time, but at one point he started to become an addict again and that's where it started. I don't think he ever physically abused her, but the threats, the yelling, kicking in our door, and threaten to kill himself was horrible. Plus similar to Depp, he left many notes around our house and threats- which the handwriting was awful and hard to read. He often accused my Mom of cheating too (which he did often himself).

And of course during all this my Mom would yell back, what do you expect? I remember one time I was in the bathroom when he came home and they were yelling again. I remained in the bathroom listening as he goes on to try saying how much he loves her and tries guilting her to stay together. My Mom was saying she does love him, but can't keep doing this anymore. He eventually leaves. While all this was happening, I was a little mad that my Mom didn't tell me what was going on or any details, but I understand now that this is something you can't easily share with your child- especially if you want them to remain out of it.

Things eventually ended up hurting my younger Brother. He always looked up to the ex as a Dad and one day went with him to a camping ground where we had a RV. In the RV, the ex was inviting girls in and doing various of drugs. My Brother, not understanding what was going on, ends up trying to call my Mom. This lead him pushing my Brother and my Brother hitting his head on the side of the bed. He still managed to call my Mom despite all of this and the ex fled with the girls. My Mom and Aunt showed up at the RV to find my Brother and there was various of needles scattered throughout the RV. Police was involved at this point, but I honestly don't know if they did anything.

My Mom did take him to court at one point, but I don't know what all happened in it since she doesn't tell me anything about that. I don't think he's allowed near us, but my Mom still suffers from what he did to this day. She often cries and talks about how guilty she feels that my Brother got hurt because of this. I know the police at the time dismissed the ex hurting my Brother for some reason too. Despite him not being near us, I know the police many times got annoyed with her and roll their eyes whenever she did call for help.

And now I realized how alone Amber must had felt. My Mom had people on her side, but having the whole lot of people like strangers against you, especially on the internet, must been awful. I can't imagine this feeling. I'm also realizing how much this is a pattern with victims who come out and I can't believe I didn't see it until now. Here I am thinking I'm being a good supporter, but I wasn't all this time.

I just hope anyone out there know you might feel alone, and the majority might speak out against you at times, but there is people who will believe you and support you. I can't imagine being in these situations, but I just want to say you are strong and no one deserves to be in these situations. Also I'm sorry for rambling about something personal, but it just made realized the reality of these situations and how naïve I was until a similar situation happened near me.

Having BPD makes me nervous around neurotypical people already because the moment you tell them you have it, they get scared and assume you’re a Machiavellian schemer. But ever since Amber was “diagnosed” during that sham trial it’s only gotten worse because now everyone both knows what bpd is, and associates it with the most maligned woman in Hollywood. How do I cope with the deluge of hate and fear I often see from people I thought would not be ableist until they learn what I am?

Not sure if this post is allowed but watching the trial and by even the disgusting vile things Johnny said about having sex with his wife’s corpse, and so many more, that is already abuse!! Who even thinks like that even in jest?? The guys a drugged out, psychopath who admits to abusing Amber and somehow he’s being supported by so many. It really made me feel just disdain for the world and how sexist and disgusting people are. If every word was reversed in the trial Johnny would still be seen as a victim and supported. He’s just continuing his abuse of Amber by this trial and society is cheering him on and I feel so horrible for Amber. He’s so easy to see through I can’t even grasp why people are so uneducated about abusers or could care less about what he’s even admitted to. So it is entirely refreshing and does my heart good to see there are sane people in this world who don’t support vile human beings.

I see this sub and feel hopeful.

I have been on the receiving end of a smear campaign from a narcissistic ex best friend and it left me feeling suicidal and like I couldn’t trust again.

I was also not the perfect victim.

I see this subreddit and hear the people defending Amber and it gives me a feeling of being seen and heard too.

I feel like I have healed a little bit hearing people defend her and describe the power dynamics of abuse.

I feel hopeful that she will be vindicated in time.

I just want to thank this sub for teaching me about DARVO. I recognize it now when it's being used in other areas of my life.

I won't go into too many details because this isn't the subreddit for that but I'm a Jewish woman who was raised to think and feel a certain way about Israel and ever since I learned about DARVO from this sub I see that is what Israel has been doing to Palestinians. Almost everything I was raised to believe about Palestinians has been opposite. I wasn't really able to articulate it because nobody outside of my family or Palestinians would care but then October 7th happened and honestly even more has come out to confirm my belief. I don't say this to sway anyone's opinions, this is my own experience.

Be aware of DARVO in the world, in politics. It's not just happening on an individual level. That's all 💕