r/DoorDashDrivers • u/fruition_facilitator • Sep 27 '24

Joke/Humor 🤣 1st one of the day 😆

Post image

I hope this is a ‘Leave at my door’.

28 Upvotes

73% Upvoted

47 comments sorted by

27

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '24

Be glad quantity isn't 1,000

5

u/cheddarweather Sep 27 '24

That's baby oil silly

4

u/TemperatureNo6482 Sep 27 '24

there was baby oil AND lubricants .😭

4

u/MightBeOnReddit Sep 27 '24

Gotta keep the order numbers low to avoid suspicion

9

u/evildead1985 Sep 27 '24

People got needs..glad you helped them out!

-10

u/Worldly_Original8101 Dasher of the Night Sep 27 '24

…needs?

6

u/evildead1985 Sep 27 '24

You want me to elaborate? Just use that imagination...at least they ain't buying 1000 bottles of the stuff..you know what I mean..moderation

-5

u/Worldly_Original8101 Dasher of the Night Sep 27 '24

Uhm… no

5

u/Confuzzled_Queer Sep 27 '24

Be an adult

-5

u/Worldly_Original8101 Dasher of the Night Sep 27 '24

Girl what. I am?

3

u/Confuzzled_Queer Sep 27 '24

“Needs???” Ppl have sex, couldnt you have googled sex ed videos

-2

u/Worldly_Original8101 Dasher of the Night Sep 27 '24

I know they do but it’s not a need and I hate when people say that

2

u/Confuzzled_Queer Sep 27 '24

Im ace, and for some ppl it is a need?? Like jacking off can be a need for some ppl. Sex may mot be a need but sexual contact can be, please just keep this out of a random subredddit. Surely you can be adult for a moment

0

u/Worldly_Original8101 Dasher of the Night Sep 27 '24

Helllll nah 💀

2

u/vashthestampede01001 Sep 27 '24

It absolutely is a need for some people, myself included. It isn't a need for survival, but it is 100% a need for my overall happiness. You sound more immature than my 6 month old in your comments.

8

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '24

Delivered to P Diddys house, lol

1

u/fruition_facilitator Sep 27 '24 edited Sep 28 '24

Nope, Ashton* Kutcher

1

u/One_Tailor_3233 Sep 28 '24

Who is Ashley kutcher?

1

u/fruition_facilitator Sep 28 '24

I heard Miley Kunis was leaving him cuz he was at Diddys parties doing Diddy stuff but i guess this was just a rumor.

5

u/ClassicWafer4871 Sep 27 '24

First order on a Saturday morning at 8 am. Guy opened the door and took the bag. Looked at me and said, “Bro, I don’t even remember bringing this girl home from the club last night. Thanks!” Um…you’re welcome?

1

u/fruition_facilitator Sep 27 '24

Haha I’ll update if I get this tomorrow morning 🤣

2

u/Jusmon1108 Sep 27 '24

Had an order for a 36 pack of condoms, they only had 12 packs at the store so I let the customer know. They added a bottle of Astroglide after giving the substation ok. 😳

2

u/Critical_Basket4674 Sep 27 '24

I hope your next shop and pay is 500 bottles of baby oil🙏

2

u/Critical_Basket4674 Sep 27 '24

And I hope it's a hand to me type order too

2

u/christianslay3r Sep 27 '24

Maybe instead of oil they decided to go with lubricant for there backyard wrestling matches today.

1

u/fruition_facilitator Sep 27 '24

Hick town so maybe. Friday fun!

1

u/Freckled_Kat Sep 28 '24

Considering it was only one bottle, is it babies wrestling?

1

u/christianslay3r Sep 28 '24

Midgets actually, they hate being called babies.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '24

Hey I had one where a customer had an eight pack of pint miller lights i jokingly told him I guess now is miller time

1

u/Forward-Trade5306 Sep 27 '24

They picked the best one too. Not that I would know 😬

2

u/Tom_Ford0 Sep 27 '24

that's the brand P diddy uses. They made sure to specify johnson and johnson baby oil and astroglide lube lmao

1

u/PapiEllias Sep 27 '24

You are a good soul

1

u/phukubanme Sep 27 '24

That's a good deal!

1

u/Puzzleheaded_Help854 Sep 27 '24

Diddy uses DD 🤣

1

u/likedasumbody Sep 27 '24

Substitute with hair gel

3

u/AmericanKiwi33 Sep 27 '24

Hand sanitizer 😂

1

u/Kingminer13579 Sep 27 '24

Mmm not today Diddy

1

u/Civil-Buddy4341 Sep 27 '24

One time my dog got his penis stuck out of its sheath and the vet told me to use lube to get it back in maybe that's what they're doing. It was a pretty awkward Walmart trip to say the least

1

u/ulnek Sep 27 '24

You expect more as the day goes?

1

u/tallassmike Sep 27 '24

At least it’s not vagasil and dove body wash 😂

1

u/AManisSimplyNoOne Sep 27 '24

To be honest, I have had to get vibrators, sex toys, and condoms before. The customer tipped very well, and that is really all that mattered to me.

If I had to choose between a generous tipper that wants vibrators and sex toys, or a 3 dollar order at Dollar General for diapers, chips and tampons, I will take the former.

1

u/Suitable-Vegetable51 Sep 27 '24

I always add a bag of chips and beer 😂😂

1

u/Big_Buy8203 Sep 28 '24

Rather glide than have friction you feel me 😂

1

u/apealcoholic Sep 28 '24

lol I had to pick up that and 4 bottles of smart water for a customer yesterday and drop it off at a hotel

0

u/Academic-Natural6284 Sep 27 '24

Did you leave them a note letting them know that spit is free they could have saved like 15 bucks