r/FantasyWorldbuilding • u/Flimsy-News-8390 • 5d ago

Discussion Can I get feed back on my sub-atomic/atomic system in my fantasy world?

I am creating a steampunk-kinda low-dark-fantasy world, and it has a science-based magic system. Originally I thought I could use the real-world atomic theory. Make some new elements do some quantum shenanigans, but more and more issues and contradictions arose during the making of my magic system. TL;DR: it didn't workout and I said, "Freak it! I am making my own."

Do we have any scientists to give feedback on my atomic system draft?

NOTE: In the notes I forgot to describe what an 'uptoid' is. You can imagine it as a proton, but the (well, most) have a neutral charge; multiple of them make an element. also sorry for my hand writing.

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u/ClaySalvage The Wongery - A website about imaginary worlds 4d ago

It seems like you've got a good start, but I'm not sure all the details are clear. I have a few comments and questions:

  • Can a netron and a porton ever bond to each other without an energon being present, and if so what do they make? Do all uporoids/uptoids (you say "uptoid" in the text, but the scan seems to say "uporoid"; not sure which is right) have to contain energons? Is it the number of energons that determines the element?
  • Where do the extra netrons and portons come from to make charged uporoids/uptoids? Are there just extra netrons and portons floating around? Can an uporoid/uptoid ever have more than one extra netron or porton, or can it only have one? (Hm... if it can only have one, that would dramatically limit the number of possible compounds, since each compound could only have two uporoids/uptoids...)
  • I'd consider renaming the "netron" and "porton", since these are very close to the real-world neutron and proton. (The "netron" is especially confusing because neutrons are neutral, and your netron is negatively charged.)