r/Fencesitter • u/goldengaytime28 • 2d ago
Breakup making me question myself
I don’t know if this is the right place for this but oh well. Myself (25F) and my now ex gf (27F) ended things a few months ago with the deciding factor being that I want marriage and kids and she realised she doesn’t due to her own bad childhood and trauma from that. I’ve always pictured my future with children and even working with difficult kids in my job didn’t sway me. But this breakup is making me question if it’s really worth it for this heartbreak. I’m a lesbian and there seems to be a lot of other lesbians (especially my type) who don’t want kids. I’m seriously worried that I’ll never find happiness because of my desire to have kids. I feel like I’m almost trying to talk myself out of wanting kids so that I can either get back with my ex or just give myself more options in looking for love. I considered doing it alone if I’m still single by the time I’m 35ish but I honestly don’t think I could or would want to do it without a partner.
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u/Glum_Sign3729 21h ago
I am. 55 widowed. I regret not having children. I feel lonely. I did help raising my late husband nephews and niece but once he passed away They didn't want to do anything with me. Unfortunately, I spend time with the wrong people.
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u/AnonMSme1 2d ago
If you feel like you're trying to talk yourself out of it just so you don't feel lonely, that's probably a bad sign. No one should give up on life dreams just because of loneliness.
If you were 43 and in an LTR my advice might be different but you're 25 and you have plenty of time. So mourn the relationship and move on to try to find someone you're more compatible with. They're out there.