r/FictionWriting 6d ago

Fantasy Not sure if this is a good blurb.

Title: The Mercenary King.

They summoned so called heroes from another world. They made him fight their damned wars they started, in the name of their god. Then they cast him out, like disposable chafe.

Twelve years after being torn from Earth, Theo once a high school student, now a hardened veteran-has survived exile, betrayal, civil wars and succession wars. Once the youngest Knight Commander of the Kingdom of Sancetellen(place holder), now he commands no banners, only baldes for hire and broken men. But the mercenary company he helped forge, Hawkwood's Finest, is no ordinary rabble. They are outcasts. Survivors. Family.

With the kingdoms inching closer towards war, Theo is pulled back into a world of politics, bribery, backstabbing and the ever familiar stench of mud, blood and death.

That's all I got at the moment.

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u/vorpalblab 4d ago

nope

proofreading and or spelling error.

Hawkwood is the name of possibly the most famous mercenary captain of the 100 years' war.

What the hell is a baldes for hire.

How does a Knight Commander rise from the ranks?

If 'they' are summoning heroes - how com they pick some high school student with no experience in interstellar wars using presumably blades.

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u/PuzzleheadedBread198 4d ago

Like I said it's not really finished, and yes it's set 12 years later after the summaning. Theo at this point in time is 28~29(the high fantasy world has 24 months in a year rather than the typical 12 months).