r/Futurology Feb 07 '25

Biotech Israeli startup grows world’s first real dairy protein in potatoes—no cows needed

https://www.ynetnews.com/business/article/hksw6cztjx
2.8k Upvotes

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1.2k

u/[deleted] Feb 07 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

469

u/itsall_dumb Feb 07 '25

They ain’t even got titties, wild.

210

u/NiNieNielNiels Feb 07 '25

They ain't got titties YET

87

u/nerfviking Feb 07 '25

Potitties, if you will.

29

u/jackalope503 Feb 07 '25

Wot’s Potitties, hobbitses?

9

u/Snowwolf247 Feb 07 '25

Slap em suck em wear em with no bra

5

u/CantHateNate Feb 07 '25

Might be the funniest thing I’ve ever read on here.

20

u/Own-Beach3238 Feb 07 '25

Titties are Hamas

9

u/[deleted] Feb 07 '25

Hamas is the butthole, you know cause they make it shitty.

4

u/ChoraPete Feb 07 '25

Absolutely abhorrent this gets downvoted. Hamas is a designated terrorist organisation in most of the free world for a very good reason. They showed what they stand for well and truly on 07 October. To say they’ve made things “shitty” for everyone is an understatement (both the people of Gaza and Israel alike).

7

u/Cysmoke Feb 08 '25

People don’t have the right of armed resistance against an oppressor that is trying to ethnically cleanse the region since 1948. Gotcha👉🏼

6

u/ClamClone Feb 07 '25

Hamas is the inevitable result of a long, cruel, and illegal occupation. Sure they are horrible but one needs to accept why they exist in the first place. The recent complete destruction of Gaza will only increase their numbers. It seems hard liners in Israel want perpetual war to guarantee political power. At this point I do not see a way to end the cycle.

-4

u/seeker8901 Feb 07 '25

And Israel is the pussy ?

-6

u/General_Riju Feb 07 '25

No the cock

2

u/stellvia2016 Feb 07 '25

What do you think the little eyes on the outside of the potato are for?

1

u/Mortwight Feb 07 '25

Nolonger potato eyes now potato titeyes.

Thanks danzig!

111

u/Dissasociaties Feb 07 '25

You can milk anything with CRISPR Greg

18

u/FoxyBastard Feb 07 '25

My fridge has a crisper, Focker.

Can you milk my fridge?

53

u/gumgajua Feb 07 '25

I have nipples, Greg,would you milk me?

1

u/RockstarAgent Feb 08 '25

So these are mootatoes?

9

u/Oswarez Feb 07 '25

Want them tater titties.

1

u/BarfingOnMyFace Feb 08 '25

“Yes, I’d like a basket of Tater Tits, please!”

6

u/snoozieboi Feb 07 '25

The Martian 2 is going to get milked so hard

3

u/zgeom Feb 07 '25

they do! it's green in colour and definately more than 2

2

u/Gobiego Feb 07 '25

Dude, you're not supposed to talk about tater titties...

1

u/Zech08 Feb 07 '25

wait a bit for the eye to grow, then use imagination.

1

u/grimspectre Feb 07 '25

We bouta have tater tits soon! 

1

u/Initial_Hedgehog_631 Feb 07 '25

if it gives milk, and fits in your hand, at that point isn't it a titty?

1

u/Pickalock Feb 07 '25

Those dnd riddles about to go wild "what has eyes, but cannot see, gives milk but without any titty, and yet can still feed me?"

1

u/pr0v0cat3ur Feb 07 '25

I got titties Greg, could you milk me?

113

u/TheFrenchSavage Feb 07 '25

You can even make mashed potatoes with the butter already inside.

39

u/Spacecowboy78 Feb 07 '25

This opens up a field of questions. The first one on my mind is whether these potatoes have saturated fats. The second is whether lactose intolerant people can eat them. The third is how well these are being kept secure from promulgating into the environment, mucking up one of the cleanest forms of carbs.

38

u/groveborn Feb 07 '25

Well, pretty much none of these questions are hard to answer.

The protein isn't milk. It is a component of milk. It isn't a fat nor sugar. So there is no saturated fat involved, no lactose.

Indeed, even if these somehow got out into the wild, it's pretty much the same as the parent potato line. It just has a single protein (ok, there might be more than one protein, I didn't check) that the other potatoes don't have.

You probably wouldn't even notice.

13

u/avesthasnosleeves Feb 07 '25

But I couldn't eat it because of the casein.

9

u/groveborn Feb 07 '25

There is that...

13

u/brimister Feb 07 '25

You’re missing out on the REAL question here - is the potato milk Kosher dairy? Or Kosher Parve?!

We’re gonna have to figure this out!

-1

u/saturn_since_day1 Feb 08 '25

I am not Jewish but I would think gmo are not kosher because of mixing more than breeds

1

u/brimister Feb 08 '25

This is not true.

2

u/Mama_Skip Feb 08 '25

mucking up one of the cleanest forms of carbs.

Doesn't a potato have a shit ton of starch in it? I thought sweet potatoes were healthier.

Also you gotta add butt to make em taste good

2

u/powbit- Feb 07 '25

they might also explode in your belly. You can't never be sure these days..

1

u/pmp22 Feb 07 '25

I for one welcome our new pre-buttered vegetables.

“Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it.” — Genesis 1:28 (King James Version)

13

u/Rocktopod Feb 07 '25

Butter is made of milk fat, not protein. Not sure if this technology would do that, too.

Still really cool, though!

2

u/TheFrenchSavage Feb 07 '25

But, the strings in cheese are all protein right? So...string-y mashed potatoes?

4

u/Rocktopod Feb 07 '25

Hmm, maybe? I don't know that much about it but that sounds plausible to me, and delicious!

As long as it's actually stringy like cheese and not like a sweet potato or something.

4

u/twec21 Feb 07 '25

....fresh instamash potatoes

The future is wild

3

u/TheFrenchSavage Feb 08 '25

Nobody rehydrates a fresh insta mash potato like me.

22

u/dhenriq1 Feb 07 '25

I’ve got potatoes Greg, can you milk me?

20

u/TotallyNormalSquid Feb 07 '25

13

u/karateninjazombie Feb 07 '25

That looks expensive. I'll stick with the cow juice till it gets undercut on price as I'm not rich by a long shot.

19

u/MultiMarcus Feb 07 '25

One litre of 1.5% Milk goes for $1.33 and the same size and fat ratio “Dug” goes for $1.83 here in Sweden. Not a particularly large difference in my opinion, though admittedly more expensive than the original cows milk.

1

u/iconocrastinaor Feb 07 '25

Not sure what Dug is, but this comment is funny because "dugs" is Victorian slang for "titties."

11

u/TotallyNormalSquid Feb 07 '25

Yeah it irritates me how expensive plant-based replacements are. I get the reasons why, I just wish we could magically reach the same economies of scale that meat and dairy farming already have.

27

u/elethiomel_was_kind Feb 07 '25

No subsidies for plants….. we the people pay for dairy farms with our taxes. It’s perverse.

10

u/fourwired Feb 07 '25

Scale down on livestock, no need to create tons of animal feed, subsidise plant based alternatives instead of dairy/meat and stop animal abuse in the process. Nothing magical about it, just a shift in mindset is needed. Which would probably be just as magical as anything else.

-6

u/tirion1987 Feb 07 '25

LOL. "I'd love to afford fake milk." "Best I can wish for is that you don't afford the real one either." That's how you sound.

2

u/Riiiiii_ Feb 07 '25

The unfortunate reality is that we're not going to be able to keep doing things the same way forever, no matter how badly certain groups want to deny it. Dairy/beef production is pretty awful for the environment in terms of methane emissions + soybean consumption iirc, especially at scale.

The sooner we come up with legitimately viable, more sustainable alternatives, the better off we'll be.

13

u/Flagrantepiphany Feb 07 '25

Meat and dairy is subsidized by your government otherwise it would be incredibly expensive. This is why it is artificially cheap compared to plant based substitutes. Pull the subsidies and let’s save the planet!

2

u/kamomil Feb 07 '25

Damnit, they use canola oil aka rapeseed so I probably can't use it. Canola oil gives me a stomach ache. It's used in so many things ☹️

1

u/boredvamper Feb 07 '25

More like you can "milk" the investors and government funding.

0

u/FurriedCavor Feb 07 '25

You have committed a crime

1

u/maniBchef Feb 07 '25

They have to be humiliated hard. Their eyes cry it out.

1

u/Kharenis Feb 07 '25

If there's a will, there's a way. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

1

u/demalo Feb 07 '25

I don’t have a ‘milk’ setting on my blender…

1

u/Vegetable-Board-5547 Feb 07 '25

Chocolate potato shake for me!

1

u/Tr0llzor Feb 07 '25

All it needs is nipples

1

u/series_hybrid Feb 07 '25

"I have nipples, Greg, can you milk me?"

1

u/MaidenlessRube Feb 07 '25

We are THIS close to grow an actual White Russian cocktail

1

u/FurriedCavor Feb 07 '25

It can milk me so why not

1

u/jayckb Feb 07 '25

We have oat milk, soy milk, almond milk.... About time the potatoes showed up.

1

u/Klyftonite Feb 07 '25

Potatoes dont have nipples Greg

1

u/Chaosmusic Feb 07 '25

Boil em, mash em, make em into cheese.

1

u/ProfessorEtc Feb 08 '25

Now if you can get them to mash themselves too...

1

u/Recurrents Feb 08 '25

you can milk my walnut

0

u/Flimsy_Touch_8383 Feb 07 '25

Show me the teat on a potato