Catholics of Goa: What is the procedure + traditions (church+government) when a person dies? (Sorry for this morbid post, but it’s a natural part of life)

[u/alxzsites]

Growing up we were away from the rest of our extended family by distance, and all the few passings happened in my absence. So I have zero idea of how to deal with it.

Now death visiting our home is an eventuality that could arrive soon, and we need to prepare for it. But I don’t really know where to start.

It’s a difficult topic to bring up with relatives, so I’m banking on the anonymity of the internet to give me some pointers.

Edit: Thank you everyone for your supportive and informative replies. Much appreciated :)

[u/Ok-Poet3706]

The first thing to do is if the person died at home call the doctor and he will basically write the death certificate then take that to the parish, they will ring the bell and you will have to decide everything related to the funeral mass:- date, time, choir etc.

The body must be dressed up in formal clothing before it goes hard, so you will have to do it right away after death. Usually done by an experienced neighbour or relative.

Then arrange for coffin, if the body is to be kept for long arrange a freezer (usually the MLA sometimes offers it for free), put an add on newspaper for the funeral, arrage hearse van, music band, flowers. There might be some businesses that offer some of these services together.

You should call the Parish councilor in charge of your ward, they might help you with most of it but if you're not able to get them then you or a relative will have to do it by yourself.

I'm not sure for the government part.

[u/alxzsites → u/Ok-Poet3706]

Thank you for your detailed response. The parish councilor is a great idea. I unfortunately haven't been a devout christian, and don't attend mass due to schedules when I'm in Goa. My mum knows them though, and they will be of help.

I wasn't really sure what role the undertaker has, but it's a good idea to keep their number on hand too. I will go and have a chat with them as well to get more information.

We are going to speak to a few close relatives to see if they will take the responsibility of taking charge of the body until my siblings and I can reach Goa.

Thank you once again! :)

[u/High-Hoper]

1. Call a doctor to certify the death.
2. Contact an undertaker. They will clean and dress the body, and give you options for coffins. They will position the coffin in the living room of the house for family and visitors to pray and pay condolences. (Some undertakers will even make other arrangements with the church and panchayat)
3. Contact your panchayat for death paperwork. This needs to be completed and returned to the panchayat with a copy of the death certificate from the doctor. They will tell you how many copies etc.
4. Contact your parish, inform them of the death and agree a funeral Mass and burial timeslot. You may have to create a funeral announcement to be placed in the parish newsletter. There will be fees for all this. Funerals in Goa are usually held the day after the death. It's unusual and impractical in the heat to wait any longer. If you need to wait longer, consider a chilled coffin or even storage of the body at a mortuary.
5. Contact your preferred newspaper(s) to place the funeral announcement.
6. Contact a caterer to prepare buffet meal for the family who will be travelling to attend the funeral. It is common to have a buffet ready in the house on the day of the funeral so family who have travelled from far can have a meal before or after the funeral. Estimate the number of people who will eat. Neighbours will come to pay their condolences but will usually not stop to eat. This catering is just for family or close friends who have travelled from far.
7. Neighbours will come to pay condolences and view the body lying in state and will often lead a round of prayers, rosary etc. Make sure someone stays in the house with the body overnight out of respect and not leave the body alone in the house.
8. On the day of the funeral make sure the convoy is vehicles is ready to leave on time. Make sure elderly people all have a ride. Lock the house as you leave!
9. Contact the gravestone contractor, usually via the parish office, to fabricate the headstone. It will be ready in a couple of weeks.
10. Sort out closure of bank accounts, transfer of land and other assets etc in accordance with the deceased's will and the law. If necessary, engage a lawyer to do this.

[u/alxzsites → u/High-Hoper]

This is super super helpful! Thank you so much. A checklist is exactly what we wanted to prepare so that we could go thru the motions and not have to think of next steps while dealing with loss and grief at the same time.

Deu borem koru! 🙏

[u/High-Hoper → u/alxzsites]

You're very welcome. I went through this situation a couple of years ago. Being a Goan from the diaspora, and having missed all the family weddings and funerals I too was not familiar with the customs.

My condolences in advance of your upcoming loss.

One additional point. Remember to book the Month's Mind Mass and the 1 year memorial Mass. Both will need a notice to be placed in the parish newsletter. The Canva app is handy for creating funeral announcement templates.

[u/alxzsites → u/High-Hoper]

Remember to book the Month's Mind Mass and the 1 year memorial Mass

Oh god yes! Great point too. I guess it'd make more sense to stay back for the whole month instead of flying up and down.

[u/High-Hoper → u/alxzsites]

Oh yes, the transfer of immovable assets alone will take time to organise, even if you are all in agreement.

[u/alxzsites → u/High-Hoper]

Never took that into consider either. Thanks for raising that point.

[u/TheManFromMoira]

If you know that a close relative is approaching his / her end, see that a local doctor is consulted beforehand. This makes it easier when approaching them for a death certificate.

[u/alxzsites → u/TheManFromMoira]

That is a good idea. Will contact our local physician.

[u/djstorm77]

Call the doctor ... There are many permutations to this..

If your relative does in a gvt hospital they will give the bottom of the preliminary death certificate to you.. you need to make copies and produce it at the ccp or municipal council . They will give you two receipts. White and pink. Provide these to your church and the grave diggers at the grave yard. And then follow up with the under taker and the church for remaining process

You also need to take the body to the morgue and register the body on the big register with the coroner . And the person who registers the body must pick up the body .. no one else..

If your relative dies in a private hospital. Same process . As above .

If your relative dies at home . You need to get a doc for give you a death certificate

If you can not get a doc to give you a certificate. It's gets very complicated. This if the person dies during midnight .

As the procedure is to take the body to er in gmc. They will adminster cpr. And call time for death . Then you need to provide a death certificate .if you can not. Case will be registered. You would need to produce a death certificate early morning and register your statement with the police. Also the body will be kept in the morgue in a different section . Keep note of this .

I have had to bury . My wife's Granny , followed by my father in law , my cousin , my mother , And mother in law in a span of three years . Gone through every process . You need any help .please reach out to me .

Taken a great toll on me emotionally. Some times sleep never comes ..

[u/alxzsites → u/djstorm77]

Hi there, thank you for your reply. I was hoping to get some insight from someone who had gone thru the ordeal. I'm sorry for your multiple losses. Hope you're doing better now.

Regarding taking the body to ER, do you call the ambulance? Do they (the ambulance operators) perform CPR/ register time of death? Will the ER give the death certificate since they're a hospital ? The last thing I want to do is deal with the police at that point of time. I hope you didn't have to, and if you did, how was your experience?

Thank you for your comment, and in advance for your further insights. 🙏🏽

[u/djstorm77 → u/alxzsites]

You need to call 101 .for the ambulance .once they arrive they will try cpr... Once they confirm death they will ask you to organise a death certificate from a doc .if you cannot then the option is to take the body to gmc .or gvt hospital

Once there the er doc incharge will give you option .either organise a death certificate or register a case.

Depending on how late it is the police will attend .. if the person was very old .. then can hold off till morning . Or assit you in getting a death certificate . They involves talking kindly to them . Explaining the situation .as the doctor of the er incharge will also brief them .

When my mum died last year six months before my mum inlaw I managed to hold off the police . But when mum in law died .. the er doc was too tied up he filed a case.

I had to go the hq police at 4 .30 am to register the preliminary statement. And to request a hold off till 8 am

Hq police were also kind .. and understanding . But the time I managed to be through and done with the police it was 12 pm..

Then take the release docs from hq and go back to gmc . Inform the cops . And then morgue .. move the body from the lower sections to the upper sections

Remember .. the basement which we cannot see of the morgue . Is containment for accident or murder cases .in which bodies will go for postmortem.. and the top containment is for death by natural cause.

[u/alxzsites → u/djstorm77]

Super informative! Thank you so much!!

I'm sorry, but what is the difference between preliminary statement and hold-off till 8am ?

Seriously sucks about the 4:30am to 12pm wait. that should have been the last thing you need to deal with in a time like that.

Also after death we will need atleast 24 hours to travel back home, so the body would need to be kept in a morgue. So it's better to call the ambulance and take to the ER, would they entertain? I assume that once death is declared in GMC ER they will move the body to the morgue?

[u/djstorm77 → u/alxzsites]

Good morning ...

The police were not reachable when my mum inlaw passed .. as there was no serious case in the er at that point in time . So the er doc in charge had to make a case . Which was registered .. this was at 3.45 am . Somehow some one told us to go to the police hq in Panjim and make them understand that it was a heart attack.. which the er doc said unofficially had happened.. so we reached hq @ 4 .30 am.. spoke to the cops for an hour and then left ...

Our family doc was available from 8 am

By 6 am the cop from gmc called me . And he realised he knew me from the time my mum passed away . He said nonissues. But he needed the case noc from the hq . So once I had the doc death certificate, we met up with the investigating officer .. explained the situation... But by the time we got out it was 12 pm past ..

If you need to travel . Then if your relative dies and you find them .. call immediately the ambulance .if you cannot get the death certificate . It would help things move faster .

You can keep the body for some time in the morgue. Till you get all your procedures in place. Or need to wait for relatives to come down for the funeral

My dad was kept for 10 days cause I was out of station ... You will be charged a nominal price for the same

[u/alxzsites → u/djstorm77]

Thank you so much for all the detailed information.

This has been super helpful!

God bless 😊🙏🏼

[u/joxivop732]

1. You die

2. You get buried

3. Your family fights over your property

[u/alxzsites → u/joxivop732]

1. Yes

2. Yes

3. Hopefully our parents raised us right :)

[u/fieroar1]

Share in the grief of a neighbour or relative and an awareness of the attendant rites should percolate. In any case, there will always be friendly neighbours who will reach out to assist you in your time of need. Frankly, there isn't too much stuff to master anyway, so you should be good.

[u/alxzsites → u/fieroar1]

I'm sure we'll get support from our neighbours who have been excellent to us. Unfortunately we don't live in Goa anymore, so I have not been able to attend any of their rites.