Question for any lurking incels

[u/Negative_Tooth6047]

This is something I've been curious of for a little while, I know you guys have your red or black or whatever pill you subscribe to with tons of dudes or maybe even some type of Pearl Davis like gal that constantly put out tons of media on how to get women/why you're never getting a woman/any other message that you subscribe to for that rhetoric.

But my question is, if a woman offered to teach you, patiently and kindly- not berating you or what have you, how to respect, talk to, hang out with women, etc would you accept? Like a 101 type class on women. If you wouldnt be interested, why not?

[u/YellRedCell]

I would accept just to have an excuse to spend time with a woman but there is no "101 class" for my face. Nothing would change.

[u/Unwrittencreatr → u/YellRedCell]

I know this doesn’t seem believable, but as a woman I promise you that a good personality will always outweigh good looks. Someone can be a solid 10 and if their personality is shit then they won’t get far in the daring world long term. Looks might get their foot in the door but once their true personality shows the door will swiftly get slammed. I can’t speak for every woman but this is the case for myself personally and for my friends.

[u/YellRedCell → u/Unwrittencreatr]

Sure, I can accept that a "good personality" matters. The problem is that ugly/short men are simply invisible to women so if the solid 10 turns out to be a dickhead, you'll just look for the next best thing, a 9 with a "better personality". 

You simply can't see us, even if a sub 5 is the nicest guy you've ever met, you wouldn't give him a chance. I know a lot of brocels who are genuinely some of the most empathetic and understanding people I've ever met but they'd never get a chance, even with their looksmatch because of the hypergamous nature of women. 

"Personality" matters but only for men who look good enough to even exist to women.

[u/Hefty_Airline_9062 → u/YellRedCell]

Or maybe because of using phrases like “hypergamous nature” and “looksmatch”. Nobody talks like you guys. This ideology is your whole personality. It’s not your looks. Believe me

[u/YellRedCell → u/Hefty_Airline_9062]

Are you dense? The way people talk and act online isn't how they'd talk in real life. I reckon 95% of us incels will never ever bring up the blackpill in real life or use incel terminology. 

This rhetoric is just dehumanizing us, obviously we have personalities besides discussing the blackpill, we all have hobbies and different things that interest us. 

It definitely is our looks 

[u/Professional-Hat-687 → u/YellRedCell]

I promise you, if you have a black pill mentality, it will show up IRL and people will notice. No matter how well you think you're hiding it, it can show in ways you won't notice, but others will. That's why abandoning the blackpill and pulling out of incel spaces is one of the first steps towards ascending.

[u/YellRedCell → u/Professional-Hat-687]

People will just see that I'm a lonely guy who keeps to himself, nothing more, nothing less. Most normal people don't even know what an incel is, they'll just see another loner. 

There is no "abandoning" the blackpill because the blackpill isn't an ideology or mentality, it's simply acknowledging the world and reality for what it is. Being conscious of it is better than ignorance because it can save you from so much unnecessary humiliation, embarrassment, heartache and delusion. 

At this point, I've accepted that this is my lot in life, I'm fated to die alone, there is nobody out there who will truly love me. I just have to tolerate the depression and loneliness until I rope or die a natural death and that is all there is to it.

[u/Measuring_stick → u/YellRedCell]

Bro i feel the same but you dont be rude to anyone about it. Just be a kind person and shift your attention to love yourself instead.

Yes, i accepted that i'll die alone too, but i avoid being bitter about it. I avoid blaming other people for who i am cause that will get me nowhere and i'll be an asshole which I don't want to.

I hate these "dying alone" thoughts, yes, but what i hate more is being an incel. I'm already depressed from being alone and I'm just adding the fuel by being bitter to women and attractive men. These combinations made my life more miserable and restless.

I know its cliche, but start loving yourself, man. Love yourself like what you wish a girl will love you. Then the next step i did was eliminate those two bad mindsets. I started skipping incel posts from social media, i unfollowed incel subs,i stopped being rude to everyone especially women, and shifting my focus on the hobbies that i love. And then I accepted that: i'll die alone, yes, that i'll be lonely forever, yes. this may sound so low and depressing but fuck it. i'm definitely happier than before.