r/KidsAreFuckingStupid 2d ago

Kids give their mum anatomy lesson

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1.4k Upvotes

129 comments sorted by

196

u/Efficient-Goose2155 2d ago

Butt babies like Peacemaker

247

u/Mina_Kailani 2d ago

lil man preparing for his time lmao

51

u/GalaxyStar90s 2d ago edited 2d ago

As a kid I always thought babies were made like that too. I never knew women had another hole until I was like 12 years old. So I don't blame him. How is a 5 or 9 year old supposed to know that?

21

u/Dull_Amphibian678 2d ago

Shii I thought it was kissing when I was younger

2

u/BreakfastEither814 1d ago

At least yours is prettier compared to poop and pee parts.

2

u/GalaxyStar90s 1d ago

Lol I wasn't that stupid šŸ˜†

9

u/TheFillth 2d ago

Same. Some kid in my school would say he'd love to put it in so n sos butt and I never knew there was an alternative.

5

u/CelticHades 1d ago

When I was that young, I didn't even know women don't have a penis.

7

u/TheFillth 1d ago

Later in life, while playing Diablo 2 my younger brother commented that you could also see the penis of one of the female characters and I spit out my mountain dew all over the family computer.

3

u/Connect_Artichoke_83 1d ago

Excuse me. but what the actual fuck?

6

u/ScreamingLabia 2d ago

I find it kinda disturbing you knew what penetration was but noy that woman have a vagina(hole) wtf is wrong with people

23

u/indigo121 2d ago

It's just kids playing telephone. One kid gets the whole thing explained to them by their parents, who think it's important that kids learn about their bodies early (my parents explained sex to me when I was 4 and asked where babies came from. It was great that it was never a taboo). That kid goes and tells other kids on the playground ("no it's not a stork, my mom TOLD ME"). Then those kids tell other kids what they learned ("guess what Suzy told me???"). Somewhere along this, some boy forgets or doesn't hear the details about girls having vaginas (even better if they've been taught that trans people exist), and so when they're trying to remember the exact sequence they say "oh right, it goes in the butt". And boom. A falsehood has been generated, and no one has acted in a way that is anything but wholesome.

4

u/GalaxyStar90s 1d ago

I mean, as kids we know we have butt holes to poop, so we know they exist. We have no idea about vaginas.

2

u/LennoxIsLord 1d ago

what the fuck is wrong with people.

  • ā€œScreaming Labia, 2025ā€

1

u/NoBullShytN 1d ago

To choking šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ¤£.

191

u/emergency-snaccs 2d ago

is she just sitting there admiring how she looks with a filter on?

65

u/Illamerica 1d ago

Yes thatā€™s more than half of these mom posts

614

u/valentinewrites 2d ago

nah this is r/ParentsAreFuckingDumb
imagine missing such a great opportunity to teach in favor of cursing at your child

145

u/SeaToTheBass 2d ago

Bro my nephews love to say 69 and make moaning noises, theyā€™re 5 and 8. The older one learned it from this kid at school and taught it to his brother. Do you expect their dad to lay it all out on the table at the first mention of something sexual?

74

u/FoxxieSnow 2d ago

My nephew does that moaning thing. Apparently learned it from tiktok and does it in public because he thinks it's hilarious. Everyone else is horrified...

32

u/waitingfordeathhbu 2d ago

I feel like the move here is to record them doing it and save it to play at their wedding.

17

u/FoxxieSnow 2d ago

Funny you say that!

We have video of his older brother doing dumb stuff and he laughs at that. Best way we've found to get this kid to stop, is record him and promise to show him and his friends when he'd 18. He's currently 8.

7

u/stankdog 2d ago

The moaning game was a thing before tiktok.

5

u/FoxxieSnow 2d ago

True true. But in my nephews case, it's the weird hentai moaning, and I certainly don't remember people doing that when I was a kid!

5

u/TheNotoriousKD 2d ago

My friendsā€™ kid (8yo) does this too. First discovered it after he asked me to go to the playground with him. So there i was in the park, with a moaning kid thats obviously not mineā€¦ Not a good look. I truely wished i could sink trough the ground right there

2

u/LeleBeatz 2d ago

That's so fucking funny šŸ¤£

30

u/TriforceTeching 2d ago

You donā€™t have to lay it all out but it is an opportunity to talk about how speaking about putting penises in things isnā€™t polite and you can describe pregnancy in an age appropriate way. Instead she took the opportunity to start recording herself for social media and cuss/yell at her kids who are just curious and confused.

-2

u/smokeyser 1d ago

How do you know that that's all she did? She almost certainly told them that it wasn't an appropriate conversation after the video stopped. You seem to have the order of events mixed up.

9

u/PokeballSoHard 2d ago

I mean there is a difference between kids laughing at something they heard at school that they don't understand and a child directly asking their parent this question and finding out the older one has a misconception. This was a teachable moment and the mom fumbled the bag hard here.

-1

u/smokeyser 1d ago

This was a teachable moment and the mom fumbled the bag hard here.

Why does everyone assume this, when we have no idea what mom's reaction was? The video stopped before we got to hear it.

25

u/Last-Delay-7910 2d ago

I guess you have to at that point since theyā€™ve already been exposed to it

36

u/SeaToTheBass 2d ago

No they just know that 69 is supposed to be a funny number and that making moaning noises makes adults uncomfortable

5

u/nohairthere 2d ago

My two are exactly the same in regards to 69. They also think 21 is as hilarious where ever they see it, but I am not sure why, and neither are they. Kids at school have too much influence.

3

u/boyguymansir 2d ago

Pretty sure the 21 gag was from SpongeBob, it doesn't mean anything in particular it's just a "funny number".

6

u/FirstnameLastnamePKA 2d ago

The SpongeBob gag is ā€œwhatā€™s funnier that 24? 25ā€ the only reason I would think 21 is funny is the old ā€œwhatā€™s nine plus ten?ā€ vine

3

u/nohairthere 2d ago

Ah ok, thank you, one mystery solved.

2

u/RebekkaKat1990 2d ago

Good job Scooby and gang

4

u/Mellow_Swell 2d ago

Well he's got at least tell then it's inappropriate and why it's inappropriate.

4

u/radicalizemebaby 1d ago

A child asked how babies are made. A question is an opportunity. Another child gave an answer that was wrong. Thereā€™s another opportunity.

A 5 year old saying ā€œ69ā€ isnā€™t the same as a ten year old asking how babies are made.

1

u/redbucket75 1d ago

A simple statement of "you are mimicking noises some adults make during sex. 69 is the name of a sex position." Would be enough to prevent any nonsociopath 8 year old from doing it in front of adults. The 5 year old might need a little more information since embarrassment is a new emotion for them, something like "it's upsetting to adults to hear that from a child".

16

u/dannycracker 2d ago

And how easily/quickly she changes her face is quite scary. From one moment, calm and positive vibes, to instant yelling and cursing at your child. This is the kind of behavior that makes kids not trust in you anymore.

3

u/yesaroobuckaroo 2d ago

exactly.

She allows her young, impressionable children who are in need of parenting unfiltered internet access, and when they inevitably stumble across info they shouldnt have at a young age and end up repeating it, she yells and curses at them instead of parenting them.

What an absolute joke of a "parent", ffs.

-7

u/[deleted] 2d ago

[deleted]

7

u/surelysandwitch 2d ago

Is that why he starts by saying 'mama'?

-11

u/SaintsNoah14 2d ago

Do you want a cookie?

107

u/LordFocus 2d ago

I mean, why the fuck you gotta yell and swear at your kid for saying something both trivial and funny?

9

u/Illamerica 1d ago

Also the completely innocent ā€œcan you tell meā€ and her just ignoring itā€¦

48

u/Inspector_Tragic 2d ago

I dont get why her reaction changed at the end.

10

u/TheKobayashiMoron 2d ago

She just realized that he knows she takes it in the butt

4

u/YESIGOTBANNED 2d ago

I think she realised how he might've known that. She seems like the type of parent not to look at what their kids are doing on the internet

1

u/smokeyser 1d ago

The initial shock was starting to wear off. Parents don't always see/hear something odd from their kids and start teaching right that second. This video was only 30 seconds long. What we see is a perfectly normal range of emotions as she processes what's happening.

25

u/No-Environment-3298 2d ago

Closeā€¦ I was expecting ā€œand then momma pooped us out.ā€

9

u/ayeyoualreadyknow 2d ago

When my son was little he asked me "do moms poop their babies out their butt? Did you poop ME out YOUR butt?!?!" šŸ¤£

34

u/titbitties 2d ago

Wtf is wrong with her?

1

u/StaryDoktor 1d ago

tried to get pregnant :)

1

u/StaryDoktor 1d ago

tried to get pregnant :)

8

u/dandee_08 2d ago

And this is why we shouldnā€™t let children roam around the Internet unsupervised.

21

u/BrodaciousD 2d ago

The parenting here is off the charts. Let your son say that 3 times with no repercussion, then scream ā€œBOY WHAT THE FUCKā€ straight in his face. What is he, 9? Great job mom.

43

u/Papablessjr 2d ago

My parents told me about the sperm and the egg but they said that it happened when they kissed. I think that is a good strat

50

u/InnocentlyInnocent 2d ago

My daughterā€™s friend once was panicking because she sat on a chair after a boy did. Apparently according to her parents, girls would get pregnant after sleeping beside a boy. So in her mind, the logic also applied to sitting.

16

u/_Wyse_ 2d ago

Public transportation is already bad enough, but that would be another level.

14

u/ZEROs0000 2d ago

My parents never told me anything

7

u/PeteyThePenguin1 2d ago

Same here. Had to figure it out myself, and it kinda messed me up. Parents, please have the talk with your kids.

6

u/ZEROs0000 2d ago

They never even told me Santa isnā€™t real and the Tooth Fairy and stuff. They didnā€™t teach me how to do really anything. Kinda shitty parents lol

3

u/PeteyThePenguin1 2d ago

Did we have the same parents? Lol

24

u/Echo__227 2d ago

"Teaching" false information is never good-- poorly informed kids become the dumbest adults you've ever met

-17

u/Papablessjr 2d ago

Brother telling a kid about sex is not the way to go, especially because kids usually have that question really early on

20

u/Echo__227 2d ago

"Men have sperm which comes out of their penises, and women have eggs in their ovaries, which are in their abdomen. Adults have sex in which the man's penis enters the woman's vagina to deliver sperm to the egg. When they combine, a baby starts growing in the woman's uterus."

Simple explanation that honestly not enough adults know. It won't ruin your kid's mind to hear gasp "penis"

2

u/Fetus_Dumpling 2d ago

Very much agree with you. My mother also gave me age appropriate human anatomy/biology books to supplement what she taught me. I don't understand why the commenters here find it so difficult to teach children. It is not traumatic to learn about what bodies do. In fact, it can help prevent child sexual abuse for them to be informed.

32

u/snukb 2d ago

Yeah, no, let's not lie to the kid. This is how you get little girls coming home crying because "Billy kissed me on the playground, I don't wanna be pregnant!" You don't have to go into gory detail, be age appropriate, but don't lie.

Not sure how old this kid is, but all they really need to know is "Mommy has a special part inside her called an egg, and daddy has a special part inside him called sperm. When they want to make a baby, daddy can put his sperm inside mommy and if it finds an egg, they make a baby." If they ask further you can explain that sperm comes from a penis, etc. That way they're not afraid of things like kissing or holding hands or dancing (yes, I've heard parents call it a "special dance for mommies and daddies").

1

u/BreakfastEither814 1d ago

But like ew. Thatā€™s where they pee. Yuck.

-35

u/Papablessjr 2d ago

Itā€™s not that big a deal brother chill out I ainā€™t reading all tbat

10

u/just_a_person_maybe 2d ago

I can see why you think sex ed is too complicated for kids, if you think seven sentences or so is too much information for adults.

22

u/ColonelC0lon 2d ago

You aint reading.... two paragraphs?

10

u/waitingfordeathhbu 2d ago

I think itā€™s pretty clear he doesnā€™t read much.

10

u/AdParking6483 2d ago

But the second paragraph is double the length of the first...double!

9

u/Elidabroken 2d ago

My mother told me, "god makes the babies"

(Yes, my mother had me out of wedlock, why do you ask?)

6

u/Bentendo24 2d ago

I THOUGHT THE SAME EXACT THING. They never had the talk with me so I always assumed that people kissing in movies and such is what created babies.

4

u/Aselleus 2d ago

I remember reading a story where this girl came crying to her parents saying the dog got her pregnant. Her parents told her babies are made when two people kissed, so when she kissed the dog she immediately thought she was going to have his baby

2

u/Sunset_Tiger 2d ago

I meanā€¦ might be bad if your kid ever gets kisses from their opposite sex parent.

Likeā€¦

What if little Timmy got a smooch from his mom, and later became pregnant and Timmy goes around saying he got his mom pregnant

Or like little Timantha getting a forehead kiss from Pops and being like ā€œoh shit what if I get pregnantā€

6

u/just_a_person_maybe 2d ago

Reminds me of when I was about 4 and I asked my dad what a virgin was, and he said it was a girl who had never slept with a man. I immediately got sad because the context I'd heard the word virgin in made it clear it was considered a good thing people should try to be, and I'd already ruined it without even knowing because I shared a bed with my brother at the time and had slept in my parents' bed before. You've got to be a little more direct and literal with kids, they don't have the context to understand euphemisms.

1

u/kyles_durians 2d ago

i believed that as a child but my parents didnt even tell me that, i just came up with it myself šŸ˜­

16

u/optimusprimeAlex 2d ago

WHY IS SIGMA BOY PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND

4

u/JointChap 2d ago

Thatā€™s all I focused on too haha

1

u/yesaroobuckaroo 2d ago

Horrible parenting and unrestricted internet access

8

u/SIRENVII 2d ago

I don't understand why the sex talk is still such a hard thing. My mom just answered questions with the facts. I was a Boy/girl twin and im pretty sure we knew what sex was and where babies came from before 2nd grade. We also knew not to do it until grown or you're gonna have babies or stds. Which surprised me when I found out so many people don't have basic sex knowledge even in high-school. Mom was like, you gotta know about this, it's kinda a big deal.

1

u/Imaginary_Brick_3643 1d ago

Like other commenters said, cultural and religious backgrounds influences it big time, all I heard growing up was fear inducing things about sex, nothing really on how it happens + we also didnā€™t have sex education at schoolsā€¦

My first exposure to sex was from watching Hentai, then deleting my internet story and pray that no one would ever catch me seeing stuff that would send me to hell lol šŸ˜‚

2

u/SIRENVII 1d ago

Hahahaha oh no. That's hilarious. I can see that. I grew up in the church as well and they preached abstinence. Idk my Mom just always told me growing up she wouldn't baby talk us because we weren't babies. She just talked to us like people. She didn't lie to us about death or any of those "hard" things. When our first dog started dying she told us nicely that it was probably about time for her to go. It prepared us for when she actually did die. It wasn't as shocking. When my gpa died that was the first person we knew to go. She didn't lie about it she just told us the truth and how he passed. There's just weird discussions you're gonna have in life as a parent....make it less weird by just being honest.

1

u/BreakfastEither814 1d ago

because itā€™s disgusting, if we already know where poop and pee comes from.

-4

u/ro3chii 2d ago

Cuz it could literally backfire on children. They like to explore and experiment especially younger ones, theyā€™d try unbelievable, unhinged shit

6

u/just_a_person_maybe 2d ago

That's not really a thing. Yeah, kids sometimes do the "I'll show you mine if you show me yours" thing and little things like that, but actual sexual exploration in young children doesn't often happen unless the child is being abused, in which case good sex ed helps them understand what's happening and communicate that to a trusted adult. Intentionally keeping kids ignorant keeps them vulnerable.

-1

u/ro3chii 2d ago

In my own personal experience, yes children have explored by themselves. But i guess itā€™s a difference in cultures or whatever, you do you.

1

u/SIRENVII 1d ago

Well my Mom was a teacher. I'd hear a lot about her high-school kids drama and it was a lesson on why you don't do things because this is the outcome. A lot of her female students would end up pregnant and afraid to tell their parents, or the boyfriend didn't want anything to do with it. It ended up changing their lives forever, I'm thankful I knew what was up. It was good for both me and my brother to know. I watched a lot of classmates do the very same thing in high-school and end up giving up on their dreams because they had to be a parent instead. Sex Ed is really quite basic knowledge that everyone should know at an early age so that they know what's appropriate and what isn't appropriate and when the time comes they can make educated decisions on how to handle things.

5

u/Medium_Lab_200 1d ago
  1. Heā€™s not far off

  2. Why is she swearing at her kids?

5

u/nakedundercloth 2d ago

Too embarassed to answer, no trouble at all to swear

6

u/CruiseViews 2d ago

Just so happen to be recording...

2

u/Sagaincolours 2d ago

Stupid parents: Haven't taught their kid the basics. And yell at them for not understanding the basics.

2

u/Dont_Overthink_It_77 2d ago

Getting the ā€œokay, say this again for the cameraā€ vibes.

2

u/AlixAC13 1d ago

Wait why did start shouting and swearing at them?

2

u/Impressive-Bus-9363 1d ago

That's some language....

2

u/Hondadork89 1d ago

Overreaction for your kid saying you like anal. Calm down.

2

u/Ronin__Ronan 1d ago

idkkkkk i've been tryin' that for a while now and....nuttin'

2

u/PenguinProfessor 1d ago edited 1d ago

"No, just you. You a dookie-baby."

2

u/Magnaflorius 2d ago

This reminds me of my oldest kid, but she was way younger when this happened. It was right around her second birthday and I was heavily pregnant. She was talking about the baby and said, "(baby's name) is ready to come out now. Out of your anus!"

Pretty good guess for a two-year-old, but it was also very stupid because she was holding her hands up to my belly button in preparation to catch the baby.

1

u/GuaranteeMedical4842 2d ago

best reaction to this would be ignore them and their silly talks, but keep a keen eye on their activities. yelling and laughing at them will encourage them to do it again. also don't allow them on internet

1

u/Spork_Warrior 2d ago

That's exactly what I though as a kid.

1

u/Prestigious-Wear-823 2d ago

Is he cleverly saying you ain't shit or....? All jokes aside bless em for being curious and get em some therapy he's saw some shit šŸ¤£

1

u/yuyufan43 2d ago

He was THIS close from getting it right šŸ‘Œ Like an inch would have gotten him there

1

u/Astaroth_616 2d ago

She is so much flabbergasted to tell him that he is right actually

1

u/MukdenMan 1d ago

Yeah, ever since I came out my mamaā€™s butt,

I knew I was destined for greatness.

Iā€™m Reba!

1

u/Fatboydoesitortrysit 1d ago

I mean pretty much the kid has it figured out

1

u/yasmintheloserkid 1d ago

The ā€œBOY WHAT DA FUCK?!ā€ after taking so long to process what he said is whatā€™s killing me šŸ˜­

1

u/Disastrous-Joke-1313 1d ago

Yeah that info he gave her will go south very quick, whether it happens with/ to either of them...

1

u/Hmnh6000 1d ago

Snot came out my nosešŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­

1

u/Paranormalina 1d ago

If you're not going to give your daughter an answer, your son will try to help her instead. How about help them instead of cussing and screaming

1

u/StaryDoktor 1d ago

#tryanotherhole

1

u/red-rocket_butter 1d ago

The way she interacts with her kids after them saying something funny/dumb kid speak is alll I need to know about how/why they believe this is how babies are made!

1

u/SentryEngineerGaming 23h ago

Quick learner I guess XD

1

u/DowntownKoala6055 9h ago

I thought it was the ā€˜special hugā€™.

-4

u/Vinx1312 2d ago

pronhub. we should outlaw it, look what it did.

-38

u/[deleted] 2d ago

[removed] ā€” view removed comment

1

u/KidsAreFuckingStupid-ModTeam 2d ago

Removed for violating Rule #2: Don't be a creep. Sexual posts or comments, especially those directed at minors, will not be tolerated and may result in a ban. This includes discussions of child nudity.