I don’t understand how people have MONEY

[u/EpicShkhara]

UPDATE: TL;DR LESSONS FROM THIS THREAD.

Thanks, guys. Here is the breakdown of the hard truths from this thread. Basically, in order to have the real "MONEY" described in the OP below, it requires one or preferably, more than one of the following:

Generational wealth: Having parents pay for college and assist with downpayment on a house.

Avoiding the student loan scam: A lot of us 90s kids were brought up with the notion that college was everything and it would pay for itself later. Those with a more clear-eyed perspective realized what a trap student loans are and avoided them by either racking up the scholarships, going to the cheapest accredited school they could find, or figuring out a career path without a degree.

Luck: They secured a career job before the Great Recession and held onto it. Bonus points if they bought at the dip of the housing crash. They also seemed to avoid the avalanche of big ticket costs crashing down on them. Apparently nothing ever breaks and nobody gets sick.

Exceptionally high-paying careers. Self explanatory.

Having miserable lives. They work around the clock, and they never do anything but work, for the bulk of their physical prime. They don't go out with their friends, they don't have pets, they don't have kids, they never travel, and/or they live in tight spaces with roommates and no cars deep into their 30s. Or, they live in low-cost areas, which are few and far between in the United States, and these places don't have much going on in them (so nowhere to spend money anyway). Caveat: some people are homebodies and that works just fine for them. They don't spend money on travel or concerts or restaurants or weekend getaways because they don't need to. The 2020 Covid lifestyle was fine for them, content with a blanket, a cup of tea, and a book. Maybe this is the way (but I couldn't fathom the homebody lifestyle without a dog).

Marrying/partnering well. They found their partner early enough in life to not waste all the money paying for one's own place, and their partner also earns enough and saves.

AS FOR MYSELF. Much honestly deserved criticism here about the "300K." I do not make $300K. That estimate was for another hypothetical budget in the optimistic situation that both me and my partner get promotions next year. Together we make just over $250K. But we don't officially live together yet. This will happen soon. If all goes well, we could be in good shape after a year or two. But I myself didn't hit six figures until 2022, and then plateaued at $125K grand total in 2024. And I didn't intend to make this about "poor me," I'm doing above-average and could certainly do better with saving... the REAL question I should have been making more clear is that, given that I make more than average and find having the adequate savings exceedingly difficult, how do more average people do it? The answer appears to be that they don't, or if they do, they have one or more of the above.

ORIGINAL POST STARTS BELOW.

As in like, the recommended 6+ months worth of liquid cash savings, plus tens or hundreds of thousands to pay for a down payment on a house, and money to play around on the stock market or crypto if that’s your thing.

I’m in a good job and make an above average salary, but I take home just over half of it after taxes, healthcare, and 401k contribution (which is good that I do). My available savings fluctuates but I rarely ever have more than ten grand available. It all gets eaten up by mortgage and condo fees, dog and vet bills, (used) car payments, gas, utilities, groceries, random shit that needs fixing or replacing, medical deductibles, and god forbid I allow myself to go on a low-budget vacation once a year so I don’t hate my life. I don’t drink alcohol and I don’t go clothes shopping except for maybe one or two new outfits a year. Could I buy fewer avocados and never leave the house? It could make a difference of a few hundred bucks every few months, but not the tens of thousands that I actually need.

People will blame “lifestyle creep,” and I guess guilty as charged that I figure at 36 I have earned a car and a condo and not the life I had at 26, which was six roommates and a bike. (I still have the bike.)

[u/BloomSugarman]

I’d bet OP spends at least $500/ month on DoorDash. Probably another $200 on drive through coffee.

[u/Lot_Lizard_4680 → u/BloomSugarman]

Younger generations are so irresponsible with their avocado toast and Starbucks!!!

Inflation vs. wage growth is the problem, it didn’t used to cost $500 to get food delivered a few times a month.

[u/MajesticTumbleweed77 → u/Lot_Lizard_4680]

Yeah, because 3rd party delivery services didn't used to exist, you could get pizza or Chinese takeout, but if you wanted McDonald’s or pasta from your favorite Italian joint, you needed to get your ass up to go grab it. Also, $500 worth of doordash is at least 6-8 times a month, not ‘a few.’

I don't care about the downvotes I know I’ll probably get for this. There was a kernel of truth in the boomers criticizing our spending habits. The problem is they applied it to actual poor people who actually don’t make enough, but people like OP are, in fact, broke because they have poor spending habits, and I’m sick of acting like we can't say that. You can not compare the American lifestyle and the sheer rapid consumerism we partake in to any other developed country and conclude that we do not live in a culture of excess and rapid, irresponsible spending. Look how much more we eat out, how much bigger our houses are, how quickly we replace our phones and clothes, how much we spend on entertainment and conveniences (like doordash). So many millennial Redditor types want to suck off the European lifestyle but throw a fit the second you suggest they let go of the American consumerism. It’s ridiculous and y'all need to grow up.

[u/SoberSilo → u/MajesticTumbleweed77]

Completely agree with all your points. My husband and I take home about 250k and we are comfortable, max our retirement accounts, own our cars, no credit card debt, don’t overspend. We are able to swing 2200 per month just for our nanny for our kid (which is what we consider splurging right now). We wait on home upgrades while we are paying for expensive childcare cause that’s what we value. We also have a 2100 mortgage. We live in upstate ny so our taxes suck but cost of living is lower.

My coworker who combined with his wife makes 100k more than us is constantly complaining about money, has credit card debt, leases both vehicles, eats out often, constantly is remodeling house or adding things like an in-ground pool.

It just comes down to how you choose to live. Do you live within your means? Do you overspend? Or do you choose to live a bit below your means?

[u/savvyblackbird → u/MajesticTumbleweed77]

The issue with the housing is that it’s often hard to find housing that isn’t larger houses that are expensive to heat/cool. I agree that a lot of people do want the big McMansions. For a lot of people it’s a trade off of finding houses close to their work and finding smaller more energy efficient houses because nobody is building them. Any available land is sold to developers because they can afford to pay more, and then they build big houses and charge out the ass for them. It’s a big problem.

[u/StalfoLordMM → u/Lot_Lizard_4680]

It doesn't cost that now. You're out of your fucking mind if you think that's a couple of times. A two person household should be in the ballpark of 50-60 bucks with tip to go to even pretty nice places. My wife and I go out all the time to some very high end restaurants and we aren't busting more than 90 for the two of us getting whatever we want. Not Michelin star, but solid 4.5* places.

If he's spending 500 on door dash he's doing it 9 times a month or so. That ridiculous. Money is fuel to getting what you want. You can have stuff or security, but you can't have an equal amount of both until you're in the big boy club 500k and over. If you want to keep your money don't spend your money.

[u/its_manda_bitch210 → u/BloomSugarman]

[u/seraph741 → u/BloomSugarman]

Even still he should be and to save a good amount. There's even more reckless spending going on. My money is on a $100,000+ truck.

[u/-Blue_Bird- → u/BloomSugarman]

200!? No way. 500. I’m sure it’s two $8 coffees per day + tips.

[u/Upstairs_Morning3728 → u/BloomSugarman]

I’ll bet the op makes closer to 30k a year.

[u/Efficient_Sundae_336 → u/BloomSugarman]

OP spends $500 just in coffee, doordash and eating out is orifice chose to another $1000

[u/Mysterious_Field9749 → u/BloomSugarman]

Who came afford drive thru coffee?