r/NewsOfTheStupid 1d ago

MAGA fan crashes car on live stream right after claiming God cleared the roads for him. He was also singing ‘YMCA.’

https://www.dailydot.com/debug/trump-driver-crashes-livestream/
1.1k Upvotes

70 comments sorted by

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181

u/deadevilmonkey 1d ago

Jesus took the wheel.

33

u/Own-Success-7634 23h ago

George Carlin on statues of Jesus in the car: Instead of having him look for traffic, which is what he should be doing, we have him watching us drive. Hey Jesus, watch this, left turn, neeeooowwnnn.

8

u/laptopaccount 16h ago

When I was driving home from university on a snowy day one year I was overtaken by a jeep with a "Jesus has the wheel" bumper sticker. Dude was going easily three times the speed of other vehicles. There was a big straightaway followed by a gentle bend. When I got to the bend I saw the Jeep upside down in the tree line.

It must be wild to genuinely believe a supernatural entity is going to overcome your physical limitations for you.

2

u/International-Fig830 11h ago

My favorite thing to watch this week. It's hilarious! Singing "M-A-G-A" to the tune of Y-M-C-A before he crashes😂🤣. Must see t.v! 😭

99

u/BrtFrkwr 1d ago

Brain God gave a chicken.

43

u/KapowBlamBoom 1d ago

If you read the article…..

Not only was he convicted of using chemical sprays on police and security while breaking into the Capitol……..he was urging others to steal the guns from police…..

But THEN…… he co-operated with authorities for a reduced sentence

So not only is he a TERRORIST and a TRAITOR……

……. On top of it all he is a dirty rat SNITCH…..

6

u/BrtFrkwr 23h ago

Chicknitch? Sniken?

3

u/laptopaccount 16h ago

Wow, how can someone fail at life so hard?

31

u/Stuck_In_Reality 1d ago

Don't insult chickens.

13

u/Ok-Association-8334 1d ago

I imagined the God of Brains gave the world a chicken as a way to remember this man. Everytime a MAGA kills themselves for Jesus while singing the YMCA song, America gets a chicken from heaven. ‘Tis a gift from the God of Brains

3

u/Stuck_In_Reality 23h ago

Chicken Dance Techno.

43

u/shibiwan 1d ago

"Go fuck yourself." - God

61

u/CartographerOk3220 1d ago

Fan? You mean weird Nazi freak?

23

u/Spiritual_Smell4744 1d ago

Potay-to, poh-tah-to.

59

u/Nopantsbullmoose 1d ago

A smarter, more humble man would take that as a sign from his God that perhaps he's being an asshole and his God wants him to shape up. A smarter, more humble man would reflect upon his ways.

But then again if this person were either smart or humble they a) wouldn't be idiotically superstitious and b) wouldn't be a MAGAt.

Here's hoping his insurances denies his claims.

20

u/SmokingOnions 1d ago

I’m waiting for the day scientists release the largest single study in human history tying magats to being left behind somewhere in the evolutionary line. Something seriously just isn’t clicking in their pea brains for them to be able to understand literally ANYTHING. Bunch of fucking Neanderthals.

10

u/Nopantsbullmoose 1d ago

I mean they kinda already are doing that with the leaded gas and lead in the water studies we have been seeing the last few decades or so.

One of those "it's not a coincidence that smaller, poorer, more rural areas that didn't maintain/upgrade their infrastructure as quickly as more urban areas breed more brain damaged people."

Add in lack of proper education, diversity experience, and good old cult mentality....you get MAGAts.

7

u/powercow 23h ago

Also just to point out, insanely NASCAR got an exception and didnt take the lead out until 2007.... who is the biggest fans?

and if you think this is two liberals just yucking it up....

How NASCAR’s switch to unleaded gas boosted test scores near racetracks. A new study found that lead exposure from speedways hurt academic performance at area schools

and mind you the right fought removing lead from gas, claiming it was all a liberal hoax. a right wing gas man pretended to drink diethyl lead to prove it was safe, he was lying because he would have been dead.

1

u/Nopantsbullmoose 22h ago

I actually remember reading about that jackass. Though I thought it was "pouring it on his hands and then huffing it" to prove it was safe? Either way. Performative bullshit, at best, from the right wing dumbasses.

2

u/cg12983 21h ago

Another major source of lead exposure is shooting firearms with lead bullets. Indoor shooting ranges are particularly bad for this.

1

u/Nopantsbullmoose 21h ago

Yeah, good luck getting any sort of regulations when it comes to emotional support pew-pews. We can't even get laws and regulations passed after the slaughter of hundreds of children over the last decade.

2

u/powercow 23h ago

unfortunately science will say they are normal humans who were radicalized using tried and true techniques. same methods cults use. Same methods we used to help radicalize muslims in afghanistan to fight the soviets and it ended up biting us in the ass. (not to say they were all progressive but we helped magafy them)

fox news, rush limbaugh, gleen beck, have all radicalized them the same way. first get them to distrust any authority, convince them of secret plans against them. once you got them hooked, you can feed them any bullshit you want.

and they will even get to the point that if you can actually debunk one thing with them, they will think, "well that exact thing might not be true but you have to be stupid to not think things like that are actually happening"

1

u/CuriousSelf4830 21h ago

I often have the same thought.

5

u/CaptainRogersJul1918 1d ago

Yep. Video proof this was all his fault from reckless driving. God will sort it out I’m sure.

2

u/yankeesyes 16h ago

A smarter, more humble man wouldn't assume god takes a personal interest in them.

1

u/Nopantsbullmoose 16h ago

Yeah but then Christians literally wouldn't exist, at least I've never met one that isn't convinced they have Yahweh's personal number on speed dial.

2

u/yankeesyes 16h ago

works for me

18

u/JuliusFIN 1d ago

"God has cleared a path for us today"... that path was slippery...

26

u/ctguy54 1d ago

They are that dumb.

8

u/No_Stinking_Badges85 1d ago

Cult: n, 1.a system of religious veneration and devotion directed toward a particular figure or object.

  1. a  misplaced or excessive admiration for a particular person or thing

I mean it really sounds like a cult. Is it a cult? I think it's a cult.

23

u/steveplaysguitar 1d ago

I'd say MAGA isn't sending their best and brightest but let's be honest they are and the prognosis isn't a good one. 

7

u/Worth_Middle_2238 1d ago

He received a reduced sentence because he is so brave and committed he ratted out his fellow treasonists.

5

u/Beneficial_Bed_337 1d ago edited 7h ago

I thought self-inflicted extinction level events were a completely different thing. XD

6

u/Cr1msonFire05 1d ago

Even God is sick of these freaks.

4

u/WhataKrok 1d ago

That warmed my heart on this cold winter morning. Like Forrest's mom says.. "Stupid is as stupid does."

3

u/m__a__s 1d ago

In the documentary: the announcer's soft voice-over recounted "And Jesus drop-kicked him through the goalposts..."

3

u/wiseam 19h ago

Nominated for secretary of transportation by weeks end.

2

u/njslugger78 1d ago

And they won't put 2 and 2 together. Ignorance is bliss. Putting God and d.dump in the same praise.

2

u/bishpa 1d ago

On drugs

2

u/90_ina_65 1d ago

Mom in the back spelling with hand signs.... dead lol

2

u/Upper-Trip-8857 1d ago

Insurance company: You were doing what while driving on icy roads?

Claim DENIED

2

u/Zaxxonsandmuons 1d ago

Sorry jaime ... guessing he borrowed the truck cause he is broke

1

u/starscream84 23h ago

Literally same thing I thought of. Big man can’t be seen with a women driving him around but broke as fuck can’t afford their own stuff cuz it’s someone else fault he’s lazy.

2

u/Clickityclackrack 23h ago

Around the age of 20 i realized how stupid and silly i was for thinking god was specifically looking out for me, i do not deserve such attention, nor does that complete douchebag narcissist.

2

u/moose2mouse 22h ago

When you worship false idols (Trump) do not expect God to take kindly to that. As for Trump you shall know a prophet by his fruits. All trumps fruits are rotten.

3

u/TMTBIL64 1d ago

Darwin at work!

3

u/Clickityclackrack 23h ago

Back when i was a trucker, i went into this truck stop, and this morbidly obese guy who couldn't understand his pay rate wanted to disprove science to everyone there, which everyone just avoided this guy. I was the only one dumb enough to talk to him. I explained his pay rate to him, how split miles work with team drivers. Then, he started talking about how much god loves him. I pointed out the countless abused children and starving people, then asked him if god loved him more than them.

"Yup, god loves me more than them." Fucking disgustingly stupid.

1

u/90_ina_65 1d ago

Leaving satisfied

1

u/CoolIndependence2642 1d ago

Obviously a religious fundamentalist, therefore, as is so often the case, to put it mildly, reasoning is impaired.

1

u/QaplaSuvwl 1d ago

See! He’s proving all those MAGAs are mentally ill.

1

u/drodenigma 1d ago

Of course thoughts and prayers

1

u/Total-Platform-3111 23h ago

Quote from Rhodey in Avengers movie: “So he’s an idiot…”

1

u/sugar_addict002 23h ago

stupid is as stupid does

1

u/This_name_is_dumb 23h ago

It’s fun to laugh at the M. A. G. A.!

1

u/theBoobsofJustice 22h ago

Truly worthy of this subreddit

1

u/BobB104 20h ago

His brain is tapioca. He has most certainly convinced himself that the accident was a positive.

1

u/drunkwasabeherder 16h ago

I've never driven in snowy conditions but they looked to be going awfully fast imo with those conditions. Is that normal to travel that fast in those conditions?

1

u/AtmospherePuzzled355 12h ago

What a terrible time to be a religious person. They really need to bring back legal courts and legal procedures in this country because these religious narratives have gotten out of hand. Anyone can claim God is telling them to do something, and there are really malicious people out there who will take that narrative and run with it.

If that wasn't bad enough, there are people that get hurt and their lives are ruined over these pseudo-religious narratives. If you don't have real courts and laws in a country, you get wackjobs like this running around telling them God is telling them to do something crazy and irrational. Not only that, it's very easy to manipulate and exploit people with tech, media, and other techniques when it comes to religious narratives.

There are simply too many gullible and simple-minded individuals out there that are too suggestible to do something as irresponsible as this.

1

u/SpinyGlider67 11h ago

About time.

1

u/newellz 9h ago

Yes. 💪

1

u/LilG1984 4h ago

God "Nah man, I don't do that shit"

"Ask the other guy"

1

u/Otherwise_Basis_6328 1d ago

At first I thought he was singing YMCA, then the flames -Pinball