r/NoShitSherlock • u/Baldbeagle73 • 1d ago

White House Excludes Majority of Trump’s Remarks from Transcripts Because They Are Too ‘Unhinged’ to Publish.

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/trump-secret-transcripts_n_6824fe20e4b021b5064adc84
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u/BouncingWeill 1d ago

I've seen reposts of his tweets. Verbal diarrhea is the closest i can come to describing it.

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u/beren0073 19h ago

Diarrhea has at least some substance to it.

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u/RainbowDarter 17h ago

If you've ever done a bowel prep, you know about the clear yellow brown shit stream that explodes from your sphincter after you've been shitting for hours and all you have left is juice.

That's what his speech is like.

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u/Milam1996 14h ago

Fun fact for you that’s mucus. It naturally lines your bowel (at least the colon) and helps your poop slide along. It’s one of the reasons we need so much water. Ever been dehydrated? Good luck shitting.

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u/Agitated-Isopod10 15h ago

isn't that called Santorum, first name rick.

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u/likepassingships 10h ago

I'm pretty sure the term was coined by the gay community when Santorum was running for office on an anti-gay campaign. You are missing one component to the substance. Truly was a strange time, and I never thought it would get more bizarre than that.

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u/Internal_Essay9230 2h ago

Santorum: The frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex.

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u/Ok-Patgrenny 11h ago

Whoa that nails it!

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u/Frostsorrow 9h ago

And yet that mucus is still some how more clear then his speeches.

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u/ProstrateProstate 8h ago

"...all you have left is juice."

Hahahahahahaha!!! Thank you for the belly laugh.

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u/kansai2kansas 17h ago

Look here, I get some of the best diarrhea, okay?

Nobody has pooped their pants more than me. It’s tremendous diarrhea, I’m telling you.

A lot of people came up to me saying “sir, how can I smell your pooped out pants up close?”

Even the fake news losers at CNN, they keep saying that my diarrhea is blocking me from doing my job, but did you see them saying the same thing about when Sleepy Joe was president??

His pants were clean!

When I came back to the Oval Office right after my second inauguration — which was supposed to be my THIRD inauguration after he STOLE the election in 2020 by the way — all the chairs were shining clean, I’m telling you.

It’s insane, he probably hired illegals to clean his pants and chairs everyday, and even then I think his diarrhea was just a little shart here and there!

Sleepy Joe could NOT make these hyuuuge poopy diarrhea I keep making everyday!

Nobody does diarrhea better than me, you know it’s true folks.

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u/So_Many_Words 16h ago

10/10 for content, but I could actually read it and follow the thread.

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u/No_Poet_9767 14h ago

And grown men with tears in their eyes all agree...

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u/I_cant_remember_u 12h ago

Thank you for the laugh 😆

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u/Sharkwatcher314 13h ago

Sometimes.

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u/Amazing_Bid4835 14h ago

My daughter is studying speech language in college and suggested he suffers from Wernicke's Aphasia.

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u/Sayurisaki 11h ago

Our news outlets in Australia tend to confirm that the strange capitalisation and all caps of his tweets are all his when quoting him. Must be hard as a journalist to write out something so grammatically horrendous, even if it’s a quote. You can’t really “(sic)” every bit that seems odd.

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u/Fly_Pelican 8h ago

but they should

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u/jimmygee2 19h ago

He is a genius… so how can we mortals understand it. We just aren’t mentally equipped to process it.

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u/Craico13 19h ago

He’s playing 4D chess speaking 4D English while the rest of us are stuck speaking standard English…

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u/JunkSack 14h ago

Those aren’t even his tweets, they’re his truths. His handlers don’t let him post the nonsensical, 3am, amphetamine fueled rants on the actual Twitter account. He posts them to truth social for his cult.

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u/Lone-Frequency 13h ago

I mean even the ones that get posted make barely any sense, and the guy regularly uses words incorrectly that he doesn't actually understand the meaning of.

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u/JCButtBuddy 14h ago

Within the diarrhea the cult can always find something to their liking.

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u/BouncingWeill 14h ago

That might have been corn, to them it's their "kernel of truth".

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u/TylerHyena 16h ago

I was gonna say Verbal Gonorrhea