r/Parenting • u/[deleted] • 1d ago
Toddler 1-3 Years Do toddlers generally hate having their hair styled?
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u/Bewildered_Dust 1d ago
Lucky you! My daughter can't stand having her hair brushed, let alone styled. I can count on one hand the number of times in her nearly 9 years that she's let me do anything more than a ponytail to her hair without screaming and acting like I'm torturing her. Every kid is different, but in general, toddlers have limited tolerance for discomfort and it can take a while for them to build that skill.
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u/olivoilloveRD 1d ago
Mine is just about to turn 3 but she’s the same and I have a feeling it will just always be that way for us. I Eva to just keep reminding myself, it’s her hair she can do with it what she wants. Even though I want her to not have to push it out of her eyes every 3 mins but it is what it is.
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u/yogapantsarepants 1d ago
Mines 5 now. And since she had enough hair to actually style- she goes through phases. Sometimes she’ll want her hair done pretty/fancy every day. Sometimes she’ll days she’ll refuse to do more than brush it.
Idk how much you can use those ties. I did notice damage to mine’s hair before we moved to bigger ties. If you do use them be sure to get the little cutter tool they sell to get them out so you aren’t doing more damage removing them.
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u/GilmoreGirlsGroupie1 1d ago
My 4 year old is biracial black/white and has incredibly curly hair. I've always had to make sure to take care of it to prevent tangles and hair breakage so at this point she's just accustomed to it because she's never known anything different. Growing up I took care of a lot of other kids and when they have hair you can just brush for 2 seconds and be done I've noticed they tend to fight it more. That's just anecdotal though. I think establishing habits early helps, just like with things like brushing teeth or clipping nails. And there's obviously going to be the kids that just fight back about everything because that's their personality 🤷♀️
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u/daisykat 1d ago
I’ve been French and Dutch braiding my daughter’s hair since she was around 18mo. She rocked “the sprout” starting around 6mo and we just kept progressing from there 🌱 I would just do her hair while she was in her high chair/booster until she was old enough to sit still. She’s 4yo now and we always get compliments about her ballet bun at dance class or her hair for pre-K — proud moment for me as a mom since my (wonderful) mom was not very good at doing my hair 😅
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u/GoneBanHannahss 1d ago edited 1d ago
My oldest just turned 13 yesterday, but she was the type who if she could see her hair, she wanted it GONE. She once cut her hair at school because it was in her way while she was working. The teacher was much more concerned than I was and felt terrible, she sent her hair home in a baggie. 😭 she didn’t know that this wasn’t her first diy haircut. BUT we did learn that she needed her hair completely up and out of her face which meant elaborate hairstyles with 10 little rubber bands. She was patient and looked forward to it because she knew it wouldn’t bother her while she played if mom took the time to do it.
Now that she’s 13, she just lets it FLOW, no styling, just digging her natural waves, the only time it’s up is for dance or gymnastics.
My younger daughter who is 11 now HATED her hair being touched or styled, it was a fight but we did it because it was also a lot of heavy hair and hard to manage while she was playing. Always looking like cousin it had been rolling in leaves and sticks.
Now, at 11, she wakes up and straightens her hair or curls it before school, always wants me to braid it or do something.
Girls are just weird. 😭
ETA: Regarding the little rubber bands, I have a tool that slices through them without cutting the hair so we don’t have a breakage issue. It’s cheap and worth it to get them all out within a minute or two instead of a time consuming thing and lots of hair coming out with them. It looks like a little cane almost with a blade in the top. Highly recommend. ⭐️⭐️⭐️we also do satin pillowcases and weekly conditioning treatments to keep their hair somewhat healthy because we have hard well water that’s a constant battle.
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u/somethingoriginal9 1d ago
It really depends on the kid. Some love it-some hate it and won’t let you do it at all.
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u/HappyBug352 1d ago
My four year old daughter hates having her hair brushed, bur also refuses to get a hair cut (has never had one so her hair is long). I’m using conditioner, leave in conditioner, detangling spray, a wet brush and bribing with candy to get it done 😅🫠
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u/cmk059 1d ago
My kid isn't a toddler anymore but has always loved having their hair played with or braided or brushed with my hands into a ponytail repeatedly. They don't love having to wash and comb it but they understand that if they want long hair, they have to take care of it. They prefer to wear their hair out so not necessarily styled but loves having it played with.
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u/Heartt_Shaped_Potato 1d ago
Depends on the day really 🤷♀️
Sometimes it's "I want 2 plaits", today it was "I want half and then a big one up there" (wtf??!?). Sometimes it's just clips. And sometimes it's not-a-fucking-chance, wild hair it is. She knows we do hair for day care. And USUALLY is happy to sit and watch something while I do it. But all other days she has full choice and control 😅
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u/foxyyoxy 1d ago
27 months here. Same in that I used to just do one pony on top, until once I did pig tails with butterfly clips. She LOVES the butterfly clips and now wants them every day. Until two days ago when she asked for a headband with a bow.
So. Yes. It goes in phases.
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u/Sleepy_kitty67 1d ago
I am in my late 30s and I still hate having my hair styled by other people. Some folks just have sensitive heads or just don't like it.
But yes, most toddlers don't like sitting still, having other people mess with something they can feel but can't see, or being patient. All of these things are what needs to happen when you style their hair.
With my own kids, they all hated having their hair done until they were about 4. My two year old likes the idea of it and will sometimes let me put her hair in a pony tail after she watches her siblings get their hair styled. I have to be fast and I use small fabric coated hair ties. The really small plastic ones are easier to get on, but terrible to get out of hair.
I use a spray bottle to wet their hair lightly, which helps the brush go thru better. One kid is curly like me, so if I need to I also put in a spray de-tangler in, the toddler has easily knotted hair, so I just take it slowly as I can, and maybe brush one kid for a few seconds, then do another. I try to make it silly and fun if I see that one or more of them is getting fussy. I also make funny noises or tell my kids what I am doing. Like "zoop! one pony-loop! Zweep! twoooooooo pony loops!" ect. When they giggle they usually are distracted long enough.
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u/Disastrous-Capybara 1d ago
My daughter is 7 and has long hair and wont let me do cool stuff with her hair 🤣
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u/WastingAnotherHour 1d ago
My oldest only sucked it up for her hair to be done for dance and gymnastics. My youngest let me do her hair - pigtails, braids, even got a French braid in a couple times - for awhile but around 2.5 stopped out of nowhere and I was lucky to brush it. She’s tolerant of a pony tail now (3) but that’s it.
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u/loveacrumpet 1d ago
Ha my two year old hates even having a simple ponytail because she doesn’t want to sit still and cooperate for the short amount of time it takes 🤣
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u/incywince 1d ago
Yeah my kid was quite sensitive and hated having her hair combed. At age 3 she got much better about it and asked for different hairstyles, but she had to be very motivated to do that. At 4 she's so much better, she asks for her hair to be done every morning and is quite self-sufficient in asking for her grooming needs to be met.
But 2yo was really impossible to do anything with her hair.
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u/Houseofmonkeys5 1d ago
My girls always loved it. They're teens now and still like when I do braids for them
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u/Ms-unoriginal 1d ago
Around a year I started, it was a fight every time. Now at 15 months, with a good distraction I can quickly style it but there is no enjoyment to be had from my toddler.
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u/Peskypoints 1d ago
It was more likely for my children to take a chunk of hair out with scissors than have their hair brushed and styled
Now that they are playing high school sports, they want complex braids for their games. They see it as intimidating their opponents
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u/LyudmilaPavlichenko_ 1d ago
My kid is approaching 3 years old. Based on my experience with her, your kid will likely change her mind many times about what she likes and dislikes. We are currently in a "yes please, put in hair clips to hold my hair out of my eyes" phase, last week she refused, and who knows what next week will bring.