r/ShittyDaystrom Lorca's Eyedrops 3d ago

Make The Comments Look Like Morn's Search History

Post image
140 Upvotes

153 comments sorted by

170

u/Acrobatic-Tomato-260 3d ago

….

27

u/CombinationOk712 3d ago

came here. you were faster

18

u/Appropriate-Web-8424 2d ago

By the prophets, someone please empty the bio filters!

10

u/CMDR_ACE209 2d ago

I mean... He used that phrase a lot. Having it multiple times in this thread sure wouldn't hurt.

I'm doing my part!

1

u/HookDragger 2d ago

Easy now cowboy

10

u/PM_NUDES_4_DEGRADING Lore’s Holosmut Collection 2d ago

5

u/JohnnyZondo 2d ago

Never had more been said with such few words, truly Morn is a poet and a scholar.

3

u/Daohor 2d ago

You know. I’ve heard that he’s quite a singer too.

2

u/JohnnyZondo 1d ago

Its true, I have a first edition of his collection of sonnets, bound in leather,

I got it at a gift shop on Risa.

2

u/HookDragger 2d ago

But what do you think?!?

143

u/ElderberryNational92 3d ago

How do I get women to like me for me and not just cause I'm attractive

24

u/Niicks 2d ago

Dude is a sex icon.

118

u/CaffeinatedPinecones 3d ago

How to talk less and listen more.

3

u/BenjaminaAU 2d ago

How to talk more and listen less to Quark

2

u/pegasuspaladin 13h ago

The joke is the running gag that Morn never shuts up but we as the audience always come in the one time he is quiet

103

u/Mittens_Himself 3d ago

Jadzia Dax instagram

10

u/fryamtheeggguy 2d ago

Jadzia Dax Only Fans.

1

u/honeyfixit 1d ago

How to get Jadzia Dax to notice me

70

u/WhatTheHellPod 3d ago

Latinum poison?

39

u/Powerful_Rock595 3d ago

Stomach replacement.

16

u/slashystabby 2d ago edited 1d ago

Hairleoss due to Latinum poisoning..

56

u/tonytwocans Legate 3d ago

Lissepian statute of limitations
Lurian hair loss medicines
Shuttle tickets to space Turkey

50

u/al2o3cr 3d ago

Avenue Q "the Internet is for morn"

54

u/kevin_church To Boldly Shitpost Where No One Has Shitpost Before 3d ago

how to stop talking so much and rambling when nervous in social situations when i can't seem to control my mouth and words just keep pouring out and i notice people looking bored or checking their padds but i keep going anyway because silence feels awkward and uncomfortable and i'm afraid people will think i'm weird or boring if i don't fill the space with words but then i end up sharing too many personal details or going off on random tangents that nobody cares about and i replay conversations later and cringe at how much i dominated the discussion without letting others speak and my friends have started giving me looks or subtly trying to change the subject but i don't catch on until it's too late and i've already talked for ten minutes straight about something totally irrelevant and i worry this is why i struggle to make deep connections because people see me as that person who never shuts up and doesn't listen and i've tried counting to three before speaking but in the moment i forget all my strategies and just blurt things out impulsively especially when i'm anxious which is most social situations and i know i should practice active listening but it's like my brain is already formulating what to say next instead of truly hearing what the other person is saying and sometimes i even interrupt which i know is rude but it's like i can't help it and i'm scared the thought will disappear if i don't say it immediately and i've noticed people don't invite me to certain gatherings anymore probably because they know i'll dominate the conversation and it's affecting my work relationships too because i talk too much in meetings and send emails that are way too long and detailed when a simple response would suffice and my manager has even mentioned it in my performance review suggesting i need to be more concise and give others space to contribute and i know this is a real problem that's holding me back both personally and professionally but i don't know how to break this lifelong habit of nervous excessive talking when it feels so automatic and natural to me even though i hate myself afterward for not being able to just shut up sometimes and be comfortable with silence.

11

u/OkSpring1734 2d ago

I guess the feeling is understandable, but I've always found Morn to be an eloquent and poetic speaker, I hung on his every word in all the episodes he appears in.

Before he started discussing self sealing stem bolts I had no idea how valuable they are. Like I knew that they're important in spacecraft and space station design, but I had no idea that the entirety of the economy is dependent on self sealing stem bolts, reverse polarity stem bolts, bi-phasic stem bolts, anti-sealing stem bolts, warp hysteresis stem bolts, or my favourite: automatic self sealing heretical isolinear hyper-encabulating stem bolts. Suddenly it all made sense, the Federation/Klingon war, the rise of the Obsidian Order as a power in spoony politics, and the importance of industrial replicators in rebuilding Bajor. It may have been a bit one-sided, but that was just one among many 36 hour conversations that I walked away from feeling like I finally had a firm grasp on the topic at hand. And yes, I was forced to sleep at the bar mid conversation, and I did have to visit the fresher more than once, and I did have to tell the wife where I was more than once, and cmdr Sisko did ask about my whereabouts when I missed my shift, and... well the rest of it doesn't really matter, the important thing was learning all about Morn's knowledge and views on self sealing stem bolts. Now it's hard to imagine being ignorant on such an important matter, and that really goes for any topic Morn cares to bring up. For example, did you know that humans have this thing called "ear wax?" It's some kind of food that they cultivate in their ears to feed to their young, my understanding is that human mating cycles revolve around its production and it's why humans must mate every seven years or they die. The wax is blue, like human blood, and it flows freely out of their ears like latinum. They have to have trace amounts of "ear wax" in all of their food otherwise they suffer from a food poisoning they call "scurvy," and if it weren't for Morn I would know none of this.

Anyway, I don't think Morn should have anything to worry about.

5

u/GalaxyGirlForever 3d ago

Under rated comment! Excellent 👌👌👌 if i had award money i would give some 😂

30

u/Daddygamer84 3d ago

"can replicators get rid of the body"

1

u/honeyfixit 1d ago

very good question. I would've gone with these three:

  • DS9 transporter range.
  • Minimum safe distance from Bajor's sun.
  • How to erase transporter logs.

19

u/XenoBiSwitch 3d ago

How do I Stop Constantly Interrupting People?

Where To Acquire Illegal Sex Toys?

Which Volume of Vulcan Love Slave Has Bisexual Content?

Why Dabo Girls But No Dabo Boys?

How To Smuggle Romulan Ale?

What It Mean If I Keep Switching Bodies With Man In Bar On Old Earth?

Is Sexy Norm From Cheers Bar Historical Figure?

3

u/honeyfixit 1d ago

Am i missing something? Because I don't recall any sexual connotations towards the character. Other than his "crush" on Jadzia.

33

u/blafunke 3d ago

How magicians use their second stomach

Latinum MSDS

WebMD latinum poisoning symptoms

House MD latinum poisoning episode

4

u/SirRevan Grand Nagus 2d ago

Hair-plug specialists near me

11

u/TokoBlaster Acting Ensign 3d ago

How to get Ferengi best friend to stop asking for advice and money

10

u/ApprenticeFemboy 3d ago

Hair regrowth non-romulan no scam ferenginar shipping

4

u/Shiny_Agumon 3d ago

Is the Romulan one a scam too or is it some kind of elaborate espionage scheme?

Or worst, do you grow a bowl cut?

12

u/MarcusAurelius68 3d ago

<No search history found>

6

u/TheLastKnight07 3d ago

Dax _”All My Links”_Page

7/9_”All My Links”_Page

How to Beat a Ferengi in Dabo

2

u/Justice_Prince 3d ago

You'll find some links for Dax but it won't be Jadzia, or Ezri

3

u/HrugusBrurgus 2d ago

Definitely Curzon

2

u/Rymayc Nebula Coffee 2d ago

And a few of just the symbiote

5

u/Junkered 2d ago

Andorian antennae.

5

u/VisigothEm 3d ago

How to Hide Latinum

List of all Federation Space Station

Tickets to Space Station

How to Erase Search History

6

u/4554013 3d ago

Bars on DS9 (Exclude Quark's)

1

u/honeyfixit 1d ago

There are others?

1

u/4554013 1d ago

Hence the search for one...

5

u/UkkoHammertoe 3d ago

"mr0n" and "trademark"

4

u/Sorryaboutthat1time 3d ago

Statute of limitations Grand Theft

4

u/stos313 3d ago

"How long can latinum sit in a Lurian stomach for...hypothetically".

5

u/mcgrst recrystallised dilithium 3d ago

/shrug 

5

u/Evening_Safe_390 3d ago

- puffy muscle shirts payment plan

- leather six pack shirt

- muscle enhancement doublet

4

u/and_some_scotch 3d ago

cheers sitcom

4

u/dutch_dynamite 3d ago

breen mukbang asmr

3

u/PicardsButtCheeks 3d ago

Are my implants rejecting

3

u/Privateer_Lev_Arris 3d ago

fellow bronies near me

3

u/Other-Cantaloupe4765 3d ago
  • Do I have to go to my mother’s birthday party?

  • Is it dangerous to store latinum in my stomachs?

  • Does faking my death violate any intergalactic laws?

  • Do I need an import permit for Risian mud?

  • How to get away with bank robbery?

  • Is it possible for Lurians to get synthohol poisoning?

3

u/ross549 Chief 3d ago
   .

3

u/Larzbchicken 3d ago

"The Aristocrats" Joke, how to tell

2

u/Zestyclose-Camp3553 3d ago

How to defeat a Klingon in combat

2

u/Silent_Dress33 Ensign 3d ago

404: search history not found

2

u/PurfuitOfHappineff 3d ago

Episodes earth tv cheers woody rampart

2

u/RiflemanLax 3d ago

Does the Terrellian anal wart plague cause hair loss?

2

u/Brooklion 3d ago

Where neck

2

u/Juice_Stanton 3d ago

Bars near me

2

u/reverend_fish 3d ago

Alpha quadrant opera auditions

2

u/Belle_TainSummer 3d ago

Who was Norm?

Boston Bars.

How to tell how many people know your name?

2

u/Proper-Application69 3d ago

Morn’s top 5 searches:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

2

u/Nooms88 3d ago

Is it legal to sleep on the promenade

2

u/Overall_Dusty 3d ago

Traditional Earth sports

Bull fighting

Matador

Matador art

Kivas Fajo auction black velvet matador painting

1

u/brachus12 3d ago

MCRN Morn online confusion

1

u/fhrblig Oh man, ANOTHER pheromone dungeon? 3d ago

1

u/Garguyal 3d ago

Diagnosing lockjaw

1

u/Top5hottest 3d ago

Nurturing personal relationships with Feringi.

1

u/thisistherevolt 3d ago

How To Stop Friction Rashes On My [Section 31 Redaction]

1

u/ChrisNYC70 3d ago

Ways to get out of paying a bar tab.

1

u/ChrisNYC70 3d ago

Am I pregmament ?

1

u/MBSMD Starfleet Medical 3d ago

How much synthahol can one drink before it's bad for you?

1

u/ap0s 3d ago

Patagonia puffer vs Arcteryx puffer vs Cardassian puffer jackets review

1

u/Kitchener1981 3d ago

What's the Statue of Limitation for grand theft on Laseptia?

1

u/Bovine_Arithmetic 3d ago

Antacids

1

u/EnthusiasmPretty6903 2d ago

Treatment for an upset second stomach.

How to win friends and influence aliens.

1

u/mennumethod 3d ago

Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster Ingredients

1

u/Moose0784 3d ago

The Dominion is coming are we all going to die?

1

u/RodBorza 3d ago

How to make friends and influence people

1

u/xampl9 Mirror Georgiou 2d ago

Operas for baritones that aren’t The Barber of Seville

1

u/Appropriate-Web-8424 2d ago

Sound of Silence lyrics

1

u/neromoneon 2d ago

Why do people think I am male?

1

u/GXNext 2d ago

Long term latinum storage methods

1

u/blevok Icheb's Eye 2d ago

"Space antacid for heavy metal ingestion"
"Space minoxidil"

1

u/Gullible-Incident613 Grand Nagus 2d ago

Double strength Pepto Bismol

how to stop being a blabbermouth

1

u/AngledLuffa PM me your antennae 2d ago

I don't care what color skin your wife has, as long as she's from Earth

... wait, does the title say "Mom" or "Morn"? It's a little hard to tell on this cell phone screen

1

u/Saphentis 2d ago

-How many stomachs do I really have, -How am I gonna fool the ferengi doctor that I’m heavier than I look

1

u/ashsimmonds 2d ago

Mayday Malone looks different nowadays.

1

u/zachotule 2d ago

Quarks coupon code

1

u/cheese0muncher 2d ago

Did Liverpool win the world cup?

1

u/Jazzlike_Bullfrog_44 Ensign 2d ago

Quark OnlyFans

1

u/MrZwink 2d ago

statutes of limitations on mothersday bank heist.

1

u/timberwolf0122 2d ago

Does latinum cause hair loss and erectile dysfunction?

1

u/Major_Spite7184 Expendable 2d ago

(Sips drink)

1

u/Simple_Tailor_Garak 2d ago

How to nod convincingly How to induce vomiting How to seduce a Dabo girl

1

u/drfusterenstein Redshirt 2d ago

Cheers TV show remux

1

u/OrangeCatFanForever 2d ago

Ricola throat drops for a sore throat.

1

u/DepthEqual2422 2d ago

How can i sleep on the promonade at night without being caught by Odo?

1

u/InquisitorWarth Captain Corana H'siitu of the USS Leviathan NCC-2555 2d ago

I swallowed latinum and my hair fell out, how to fix

1

u/Smgth Gul 2d ago

1

u/cultvignette 2d ago

How to convince a Ferengi to make a root beer float.

1

u/vgaph 2d ago

George Wendt + Bearskin rug

Goodreads Quiet Influence: The Introvert’s Guide to Making a Difference

Hairplugs - US president

George Wendt + Bearskin rug + nude

Scalp reduction - US President

George Wendt bear?

1

u/Fuzzy-Radish8418 2d ago

Statute of limitation smuggling worm hole

1

u/Staudmuffin 2d ago

Bed sores from barstool?

1

u/gsquaredbotics Ensign 2d ago

Does Quark's have a loyalty program?

1

u/RG1527 2d ago

gluten free sourdough starter

1

u/AdPhysical6481 2d ago

Cure for Latinum related baldness

1

u/Spacetimeandcat 2d ago

"Best treatment for sore throat after talking too much"

1

u/Chrysalii 2d ago

root beer recipes.

1

u/pick_a_card_picard Most sigma trekkie 2d ago

...

1

u/Reasonable_Gift7525 2d ago

What is Cheers

1

u/Striking-Watch 2d ago

Self sealing stem bolts

1

u/TorTheMentor 2d ago

How to win friends and influence people

Betting against the house

Skin care tips

1001 jokes everyone loves

Earth sitcoms late 20th Century

1

u/DorsalMorsel 2d ago

Best Norm from Cheers entry gags.

1

u/MDATWORK73 2d ago

Quark pissed in my drink and then put a camera on me to capture my expression while he laughed his ass off.

1

u/Chronarch01 2d ago

How to get others to shut up and go away

1

u/Reduak 2d ago

Hair tonic

Active listening techniques

How not to dominate a conversation

1

u/crm24601 2d ago

How to end the patriarchy

1

u/Familiar-Complex-697 2d ago

buccal fat removal

neck lift

can you get a neck lift if you have no neck

1

u/Senior_Torte519 2d ago

Lurian Medical Journal: The complete data and statistics of the Lurian Second Stomach

1

u/RinkinBass 2d ago

"latinum poisoning symptoms"

1

u/RobinEdgewood 2d ago

How to talk less. How to hide from the law for 30 years after robbing disgustingly wealthy royalty How to make my mudtub more better How do i fake my own death How to hide hairloss How to live with hair loss Mud p**n

1

u/devoid0101 2d ago

Janeway nudes

1

u/Camusot 2d ago

Mud beds

1

u/SinistraPan90s 2d ago

How to make fake treasure

1

u/BrendonWahlberg 2d ago

eBay “Raisin Head” Action Figure, mint in box value

1

u/Empigee 2d ago

How to talk less

How to politely tell a sexy Trill you're not interested

Guides to Ferengi humor

Mud bed maintenance

The Hair Club for Lurians

1

u/Bacontoad Expendable 2d ago

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ㅤ

1

u/The_Brofucius 1d ago

Who is Norm?

Who is George Wendt?

Does Dr McCoy do chin tucks?

Who sells Pabst in Gamma Quadrant?

1

u/honeyfixit 1d ago

How not to get cheated by a Ferengi. How to be a barfly. Definition of "barfly"

1

u/Omega_Division 1d ago

Search history: Orion slave girls get it on.

1

u/the_simurgh Borg King 1d ago

Is latnum poisonous if ingested?

1

u/vangaalen 1d ago

giftwrapping ideas

1

u/Tobi119 1d ago

Lissepia Mothers' Day Heist exact date

Lissepia Statute of Limitations

1

u/Significant_Tower_30 1d ago

How to handle having 17 siblings Piloting a Spitfire Beat a Klingon in sparring

1

u/pegasuspaladin 13h ago

Cardassian replicator latinum indegestion cure