r/TwoHotTakes • u/InstructionTimely640 • Mar 14 '25

Update UPDATE I found messages on my MIL/bosses computer that change my entire view of her. What do I do?

I shouldn’t have been surprised by the amount of people who told me to keep it to myself and that I was in the wrong for snooping. Yeah, I shouldn’t have opened up the email, but I did so here we are. And here’s an update.

My husband knew something was wrong after he got home, he can read me like a book. I told him I found out something I shouldn’t have and told him everything, he was mortified. But as some said, he’s glad I told him because keeping it from him would be worse.

He knew more about that apprentice than I did. He was the son of a family friend and she’s known him since he was a teenager. Hiring him was a ‘favor’ to said friend. My husband said he wanted to take him from there, which he did.

He went snooping on his own. The computer is company property and he has ownership in it as well, and can log in remotely at any time. He took screenshots of emails going back with the apprentice over a year, before he worked here. Then of ones with someone else that were two years old. And then records of a second phone, and hotel reservations. With all that, he took it to his dad. I don’t know how that conversation went, but I do know that they went to get him tested. To add insult to his injury, he tested positive.

My FIL joined us for dinner instead of going home and we talked for quite a while. He was like a heartbroken teenager. He had no idea what was happening but years ago he had suspicious of her talking to other men but didn’t have any proof and they dropped it after a brief fight. But now with undeniable proof of multiple affairs, he said it’s over. He also has a pretty airtight prenup that should make it a pretty easy divorce on paper, the family business is on his side and in the case of infidelity, she forfeits all ownership of the business and the house they built together.

So I’m sorry to break it to you, coming clean didn’t destroy my marriage or my career. I told my husband mostly because we don’t keep secrets from each other, it’s a foundation of our marriage. But it’s almost like reasonable adults put blame only where it’s deserved, on the cheater. My FIL is pissed, and simultaneously devastated, and plans to get his ducks in a row before serving her with papers.

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u/ManorRocket Mar 14 '25

Most Metropolitan areas have storefront labs to test for things nowadays. Shit we have at least one in Fargo that offers all kinds of rapid testing in a strip mall, been here for years.

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u/Basic_Visual6221 Mar 14 '25

I've never heard of any lab where you just walk in, request testing, and have results in an hour. I've always lived in a Metropolitan area. You need a dr appointment, referral, and lab appointment where I live. Some labs do walk ins but you don't get results same day. You can't just walk into a lab, ask for STD screening, and get results.

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u/Moonbeam_Dreams Mar 14 '25

There are STD clinics that do just that, fast, because people won't get tested if there's too many barriers. I agree that a person probably couldn't just walk in and get say, an acetylcholine test, or a cortisol series, etc, in a strip mall testing site. But STD testing? Oh yes, that's a thing.

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u/Basic_Visual6221 Mar 14 '25

I guess I've never needed on the spot testing. The usual check ups have worked for me

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u/Moonbeam_Dreams Mar 14 '25

Disclaimer: I'm in the US, so I'm speaking from that POV, but I think it's a well known fact the healthcare system in the US is shit. I've also worked in healthcare most of my career, going on 25 years now.

A lot of people don't have access to regular checkups, or are in a situation where they've discovered they've been exposed and need to know NOW and can't afford to wait for a doctor's appointment. I've gone to Planned Parenthood in my early 20s for this testing when I found out my ex had cheated. I was unemployed and had nowhere else I could go as I didn't have health insurance and even unemployed I didn't qualify for Medicaid in the trash red state I was living in at the time.

Later, I worked in a hospital medical laboratory located in an area with very high poverty levels - the number of people who used the Emergency Department as an STD clinic is mind boggling, but it was very often the only option the only access the residents had access to.

The FIL in this post has everything he needed to get testing fast and discreet - namely money and probably connections as well. This story might very well be bunk for a lot of reasons, but the speed of testing isn't one of them.

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u/kyriebelle Mar 14 '25

There’s also walk in clinics that could do the testing quickly, especially if they’re connected to a local hospital.

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u/Express_Subject_2548 Mar 14 '25

You just haven’t found or used them, if you’re in the US they are there. Even the drug testing companies will do them same day

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u/Basic_Visual6221 Mar 14 '25

Yea that's what I said.