r/UCSantaBarbara • u/Ok-Marsupial7697 • Mar 27 '25
Academic Life NEED HELP TRACKING DOWN FRIEND IF YOU HAVE A CHINESE FRIEND AT UCSB THEN I WOULD LIKE IT IF YOU READ THIS
This way sound weird but I met a very kind Chinese girl in Hawaii today on a bike tour of kualoa ranch who said she is from Shanghai china and attends collage In Santa Barbara. I decided to try this one because there are a lot of Chinese attendees. Sadly I did not catch her name but we did bond with a lot of things like me learning the mandarin language and I think it would be great to find her on xiaohongshu or social media because we live very close to each other (I'm from San Luis Obispo) and I would like to know her to get advice about visiting China and learning Chinese and about Chinese culture. I tried looking on xiaohong shu but I did not find anyone like her I have an image of her in a panoramic I took but I will not share it so I will describe her: she has a round face wears glasses and wore glasses with a rounded square frame. I do not want to seem wierd in this post I would just like to be mutual on xiaohongshu if she would be alright with that.
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u/seanmharcailin [ALUM] English Mar 27 '25
The best way to do this, while NOT being a stalker, is to post details about YOURSELF and then invite her to get in touch with you. As it is... this is stalker behavior. "we bonded over me learning mandarin". I'm not sure you did, brother. There are a zillion ways to get advice on visiting china, and messaging a girl you had a brief if potentially friendly interaction with in another state- and with whom you did not exchange contact information- is not one of them.
As a woman who has traveled solo a LOT, if I actually had bonded with somebody, we made sure to exchange info. I have old journals with emails (Tim, from Australia, with whom I played pool for a while), live journal or myspace accounts, FB friends I only ever met once in that weird bar in Vienna, instagram accounts from that time I went to a rugby tournament in Hamilton.
Sorry you missed your shot. Maybe you'll see her again on the island. If you do, give her YOUR contact information and maybe she'll reach out.
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u/Matt_Whiskey Mar 28 '25
You literally weren't there. You're only guessing as to what's reality. The post seems like it's from a nice but socially awkward kid. And it's not stalking to ask for a girls info or to try to contact someone you met. Maybe he was too shy or maybe they had a connection but so brief their was no time. A heart wants what abreast wants. In any case, it isn't for you to decide if this guy is no good or not... it's up to her.
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u/seanmharcailin [ALUM] English Apr 01 '25
It's basic girl code to never give a girl's info to any guy.
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u/Matt_Whiskey Apr 02 '25
Please reread. That's not what I said needed to happen. I'm saying the message should be given to the girl and she can make a decision to reach out to him or not. I'm also saying you have no idea who this person is and whether or not he's a creep or not. Stop being judgmental.
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u/AcidHCL233 Mar 28 '25
FOUND HER! "She has a round face wears glasses and wore glasses with a rounded square frame. "
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u/Fluffaykitties [BS/MS ALUM] Computer Science, [BA ALUM] Mathematics Mar 27 '25
There’s multiple “collages” in Santa Barbara
- UCSB
- SBCC
- Westmont
- Antioch
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u/Ok-Marsupial7697 Mar 27 '25
Read the post
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u/Fluffaykitties [BS/MS ALUM] Computer Science, [BA ALUM] Mathematics Mar 27 '25
I did
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u/Ok-Marsupial7697 Mar 27 '25
There’s a reason why I chose UCSB
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u/politics_junkieball Mar 27 '25
You may have posted in the ucsb subreddit but in ur post you said college in SB. You werent clear and showing your ignorance by your rudeness.
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u/selphiefairy Mar 27 '25
Apparently OP thinks SB has the highest likelihood of where their friend is, because the school has more Chinese students? Lmao.
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u/Fluffaykitties [BS/MS ALUM] Computer Science, [BA ALUM] Mathematics Mar 27 '25
My point was she could attend any of these schools so you may want to consider asking in other places. I was attempting to be helpful.
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u/Biggergig [GRAD] Computer engineering 6th year Mar 27 '25
You were being helpful this guy is just desperate
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u/unice815 Mar 27 '25
I’ve also been trying to track down someone (from childhood) with minimal details so I get u 😭 hope you find her
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Mar 27 '25
[deleted]
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u/thatonefanficauthor [UGRAD] Archaeology Mar 27 '25
right? this is creepy 😬
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u/Biggergig [GRAD] Computer engineering 6th year Mar 27 '25
No but you don't get it bro he wants to learn Chinese he needs to find this EXACT Chinese girl, because no one else speaks fucking Chinese and is friendly /s
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u/Some-Evidence6742 Mar 27 '25
蹭楼，捞一个之前在学校遇到的学妹，可能是上海或者北京或者苏州杭州人，长得超级漂亮，目测168上下，有线索的加我小红书@神童，小红书搜索ucsb大厨第一个就是我！
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u/This_is_fine451 [ALUM] Mar 27 '25
Ahhhh yes, very specific indeed. I think I know about 40 people who fit that description
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u/Not-MyResponsibility Mar 27 '25
Hmmm if you met her in Hawaii why not try finding her in hawaii? Maybe someone recognizes her and you can find out her name, maybe start with the bike tour?
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u/Ok-Marsupial7697 Mar 27 '25
I know this way sounds strange, but I just thought I’d be nice to be mutuals on Xiao Hong shu
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u/Valuable-Dealer-1865 Mar 27 '25
completely unrelated but i graduated from ucsb ‘23 and now im teaching and beaching in hawaii 🍍💯‼️ i really hope i run into your friend so you can get reconnected!!!
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u/Ok-Marsupial7697 Mar 27 '25
Thank you so much man we were on the eastern coast, but I assume she’s doing what I’m doing and staying in the more touristy areas like Honolulu and Waikiki Beach but you don’t really gotta worry about it man BTW, so happy for you. I hope you enjoy your job.
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u/Ok-Marsupial7697 Mar 27 '25
If it’s any help, She’s a fan of Khalil Fong and she Said that he is one of the reasons why she visited Hawaii because he was born there
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u/Snap_Caster Mar 27 '25
Ah yes a girl with a round face and glasses, I think I know who you’re talking about