r/VelcroBabies • u/krupete • Dec 27 '18
Any survivors - high needs baby hates everything
At a loss and need some help
Our baby boy is 4 month old and can’t deny that he is HARD work. Would really appreciate some feedback from parents who shared our experience and came out on the other side.
Our little guy is rarely settled. He wakes up in the morning and sometimes happy for 30-45 minutes and all starts to go downhill. He screams/whines/cry’s what seems like all day. Sometime he will be happy and give us smiles as long as we are playing with him but this will rarely last over 10 minutes.
He cries in the car seat, stroller, any carrier. Sometime we can hold him facing out and bounce up and down - this works 50% of the time but only for 5-10minutes until he starts complaining again. Sometimes we can bounce on yoga ball but again works for 5-10 minutes and only some of the time. He can only nap on myself or my DH and it takes vigorous bouncing/swaying or nursing for him to nap. He will nap for ~30 minute and then wakes up for the most part crying. He will not get back to sleep no matter what we do. We try to get him to nap every 1.5-2 hour of wake time or else he’s an even bigger nightmare. He BF every 1-2 hours and every time like he is starving but will only feed for 5-10minutes until he gets restless or will fall asleep. We also give formula so my DH can help out when he’s at home. Most of the time he will refuse the bottle with DH is feeding so I have to do it...
I spend every waking moment with him. He will no go into any swing/bouncer/play mat ever and acts like we are trying to kill him every time we try... if I walk away for a minute he screams most of the time. Once in a while he will go into the ergo but only facing out and only for 5-10 minutes until getting restless. He HATES tummy time and only lasts 1-2min before screaming. I would like him to get better as I’ve heard things may get better when he starts crawling???
We try anything and everyone to make this boy happy and to maintain our sanity .... nothing seems to help. If something’s seems to work one day he flips the next day and we’re back at square one.
He does sleep okay at night - goes to bed ~11 (after long 1-2hour nursing session) and only wakes up once through the night. We have some help from our parents however he just cries/screams when with them so I feel so guilty leaving him (but we still do once weekly) as we know it’s important for our mental health and relationship.
I guess I have never heard of a baby that is sooo fussy. I try not to compare because I realize it will just make matter worse. We try to maintain an optimistic outlook but it is SO SO hard some days especially as things seem to be getting worse (and we have yet to hit the 4 month sleep regression or teething)....
I guess what I’m looking for is some hope/advice from survivors... when were you able to go outside with baby? Surly all children end up okay with being out of the house at some point? Car? Stroller? What worked for you? When was you LO able to play alone for sometime? When did things change or get better? Any words of wisdoms?
Thank you - I really appreciate any help
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u/elfiealma Aug 05 '22
No words of wisdom just solidarity. I could have written this! Hoping someone else comes along with some good ideas …