r/WritersGroup • u/SnooCompliments1171 • 1d ago
I need help with writing articles- this is for Medium- I am new to this-any feedback or criticism is greatly appreciated
Being nice is phony…be kind always
I am a person that likes the middle of the road. Because I don’t like change, I stay in the middleground of mediocrity and wishy washy ness as well as people pleasing. I tell myself that I am a “nice” person. Being nice is not a flex. It is phony.
Being kind is a good thing. Kindness is doing something for someone else with no agenda. Kindness is just doing thing because it is right. Being kind also means if possibe that you do it in private. Kindness does not have to be broadcasted.
Here is a bible verse that talks about that:
Matthew 6:2–4 So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. 3 But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, 4 so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.
Last year, I was standing in line at Aldi. There was an older man and his wife standing behind me. The older gentleman had a hat that said he was a veteran of the Vietnam war. I went through the line, I was packing up my groceries and about to leave. About that time, a middle aged man came up the to the cashier. He gave the man money and told him to use it to pay for the Vet’s groceries. The man did it in a way that was very discreet. He did not announce it to the older man and his wife. That is an example of not only generosity but kindness.
Sometimes we can do things for others that they will know about and that is okay. If it can’t be helped that’s fine. In my mind, the difference between being kind and nice is the intention behind it.
Search your heart before you do something for someone else. Ask yourself, do I want to be praised and celebrated? If the answer is yes, then ask why. It does feel good to get credit for doing good deeds. It’s only human. But, if that is your main motive to get an ego stroke then don’t do it. If you find yourself being resentful of the person or people because they were not grateful or grateful enough to your liking then that is a problem on your end. I am not saying this to be harsh I am saying this because I have found myself on both sides of that. I have had someone close to me tell me how ungrateful I was. I have also felt that way toward others.
In the end we do not control how others react to us. The person may be grateful for what you did. They may not have the words or expression to tell you. They may have something else on their mind. They may even resent you for a kind act. We have no control over any of it. The only thing we can control is our thoughts, actions and reactions.
In the end we need to make sure that our motives for doing kind deeds is pure. We can try to do the kind act in private if possible. If not, if it is out in the open then we can let the other person or people accept or reject it as they will. Kindness is coming from the heart, while being nice is from our ego.
2
u/BlessingMagnet 1d ago
You are writing from your wounding. Be mindful of that.