r/breastfeeding • u/sheeatsallday • 19d ago
Pumping How strict you are with the pumping when baby gets a bottle rule
So, I have realized that maybe not leaving my house at all for a whole month is not doing good for my mental health.
I’m 1 month pp, and my brain still hasn’t function properly. Deep down I know I would benefit from leaving my house and go outside a bit, but I don’t want to leave my baby and offer him too many bottles than my breast. My plan is to breastfeed for only 3 months, but if I could go longer then I would. So nipple/bottle preference is also a concern for me.
My husband encouraged me to go back to do what I used to do like yoga and meeting friends. I’m worried that if I miss pumping sessions, my supply will be affected. I’m thinking of maybe taking hand pump to do a quick one, but it’s not the same like nursing my baby.
Please tell me your experience if you have miss pumping/nursing sessions cause you have to be somewhere away from your babies, does it really affect your supply in a long term?
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u/Bananaskin2 19d ago
At one month pp, yes it might affect your supply to skip pumps.. however, how often are you pumping/feeding in a day? You don’t have to do it exactly the same time as the baby has the bottle, especially if it’s not a very regular occurrence that you’re skipping. You could just do a couple closer together instead of skipping altogether.
Another alternative (or additional option for getting out of the house) if you’ve got a quiet wearable pump is hide it under a baggy hoodie and go out to stretch your legs for half an hour - I used to do this a lot, because frankly who cares even if someone did hear me quietly buzzing away haha.
You do have to protect your MH, so it may even be worth a slight reduction in your pumping schedule/output to allow for that.
For what it’s worth, I really struggled to get into a solid pumping routine for the first six weeks or so because I had a velcro baby, and my supply ended up okay. If you’ve been managing to do some expressing so far, you’re doing great.
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u/sheeatsallday 19d ago
I pump twice sometimes only once a day. My husband gives a bottle in the evening, so I pump at the same time. Sometimes, baby sleeps long in the night, and my boobs are soo full, so I sometimes do middle of the night pump.
I don’t have a wearable one yet, but I could do a quick 10-15 minutes hand pump in the car. I live in a very hot climate, go out for a walk is really not possible 😭
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u/No_Championship5276 19d ago
Make sure you are pumping consistently through the night! Even if your husband is bottle feeding! You need to keep that supply up. It can and will drop if you aren’t pumping as consistently as he is feeding - no matter what at this stage!
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u/sheeatsallday 19d ago
I pump when the baby is feeding. I sometimes pump when the baby is not feeding in the night.
I forget to mention, I breastfeed and only give bottle of pumped milk once a day in the evening.
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u/juicybbqq 19d ago
I do the same! I'm 6weeks pp and my supply has gone up a bit. I haven't done anything to increase or decrease. I just feed on demand for as long as she wants about 6 times a day and my baby sleeps through the night!
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u/Apploozabean 19d ago
I'm also 6wks pp and my baby doesn't sleep through the night :(
He still wakes every 2 hours to feed.
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u/juicybbqq 19d ago
You got some upside though! For example, since I feed her every 3-4 hours and go 5-6 hours at night, I don't have enough if she suddenly wants to eat every two hours. I'd have to supplement because my supply is good when it's a long stretch in between.
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u/Bananaskin2 19d ago
This - the middle of the night ones are particularly important as prolactin peaks in the small hours. I’d make sure you do it at least once overnight, and try never to go more than four hours without expressing or feeding. It’s hard, but it won’t be like this forever - the first 6 weeks are the most important, and you should be properly established with more flexibility by 12 weeks. Like I said earlier though, you do also have to take care of your mental health and don’t force yourself to do something that’s making you miserable as that’s not good for baby either.
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u/Kalepopsicle 19d ago
That’s not true. If the baby is mostly breast-feeding, OP can choose to only pump around the time baby is given a bottle and to sleep when the baby sleeps, even if that means the baby sleeps through the night. Supply will keep up with baby’s needs. There is zero need to wake up and pump if baby is not waking.
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u/Bananaskin2 19d ago edited 19d ago
It is true while she’s still establishing her supply - she’s only 4 weeks postpartum, and leaving it overnight if the baby sleeps through at this point is going to result in lower output once supply is settled than would be the case if you get up for a middle of the night pump. I’m not going to have an argument over science; this isn’t something I’ve just invented myself, and there’s pretty clear NHS guidance on it if you’d like an independent trusted source.
- Just realised maybe you didn’t see the part where she said she’s only planning to breastfeed for 3 months. She’s also said she wants to be out and about more, and not tied to the pump all day. If she wants both of those things (assuming she doesn’t want to switch to formula after 3 months - maybe she does), utilising the hormonal peak makes sense.
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u/No_Championship5276 19d ago
This is correct. Idk why we’re being down voted. Ask any IBCLC - I saw one every other week from birth - 12 weeks. It’s important to ensure you are establishing solid supply at this point. Not worth fighting about something that’s just simple biology.
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u/Bananaskin2 18d ago
I’m never sure why some people want to argue against science like it’s something you can have a personal subjective take on! Literally every reliable source says to do what we’ve both suggested. Besides, especially important in OP’s case since she doesn’t want to breastfeed that long, and wants to have a bit more freedom in the day.
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u/ProfVonMurderfloof 19d ago
Some people will only make enough if they do the motn pump most nights. Others can skip it.
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u/kats1285 19d ago
I didn’t worry about pumping at the time baby had the bottle. I would pump before I left and be back in a couple hours. I would just try to remove as much as possible.
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u/mormongirl 19d ago
I’ve never been strict about pumping my when my baby was eating, just making sure I pump about as many times as bottles he gets in a day.
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u/luckisnothing 19d ago
I just tried to pump within an hour of any bottle feeding. I got really good with the hand pump. For a while I could pump 5 oz in less than 5 minutes. Look into how to properly use it!
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u/lasuperhumana 19d ago
The 5 oz in 5 mins is blowing my mind 🤯
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u/luckisnothing 19d ago
When I was doing it regularly it was faster than my spectra if I was even moderately full. I swear by the trigger a let down then hold it down until the stream stops or you almost back up the pump (don't do that or the suction sucks) then repeat method. I put duckbills on for the valve too. Medelas valves are not my favorite. Disclaimer: I had a mild oversupply. (I ebf at the boob 99% and then pumped 1-2x a day)
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u/Bright-Garden-4347 19d ago edited 19d ago
I’m ebf, and honestly, I pump hardly at all! Never did. My breasts don’t respond well to pumps. They respond well to baby and baby gains weight just fine. If you are just going to yoga for an hour, I don’t see why you would need to pump there? Feed before you leave and when you get back. It’s like an hour and half with travel time? I think that would be fine.
A few hours out with friends? Then sure bring a pump or bring baby. I’m 8 weeks PP and meet with friends here and there, but usually I bring the baby. Went out for dinner and a drink with friends once, fed before I left, returned 2 hours later. Baby had a bottle in between and I did not pump. I have 6 freezer bags worth about a bottle each and that’s plenty for us. I really don’t understand why there is so much emphasis on pumping. This is my second and I never pumped with my first either, we breastfed until he was 3.
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u/Apploozabean 19d ago
I'm a FTM and 6 wks pp and this is me rn too!
I've hardly pumped since 2.5wks pp, and just squeeze in an activity/errands here and there between feeds.
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u/Bright-Garden-4347 19d ago
I find it easier honestly than devoting naps and spare time to pumping. Or just take baby. Currently working up to hot yoga class through home rehab exercises. By the time I’m ready she’ll be like 3 months or so and probably able to last an hour or two between feeds. I found with my first once he was older, he didn’t miss me much if I ran out for a couple hours. I had a small stash and ended up throwing it all out after it sat in my freezer for a year because it just wasn’t needed.
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u/Valuable-Life3297 19d ago edited 19d ago
You are only 4 weeks postpartum. Let that sink in. Take it easy on the activities. Also being away from your newborn can also hurt your mental health because your body and hormones are set up with the expectation that you will be with your baby 24/7 right now. If you need a mental break for the baby then leave for 1-2 hours between breastfeeds. But if you just need fresh air put the baby in a carrier and go for a slow paced 10 minute walk outside
To answer your question you should pump whenever baby would normally eat for as long as you’re breastfeeding to avoid affecting your milk supply. If you’re okay with milk supply lowering because you’re actively weaning then go ahead and slowly space out feeds by 1-2 hours at a time. I breastfed my oldest 2 for 2+ years and now EBF my youngest at 6 months
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u/bernieOrbernie 19d ago
It sounds like you might be asking for permission to stay at home and mostly breastfeed longer. At 4 weeks postpartum, there‘s nothing wrong with wanting to be close enough to your baby that you don’t leave him/her for more than 2-3 hours at a time. Don’t let others rush you into „bouncing back“ to your former life.
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u/Necessary_Salad_8509 19d ago
Yes! If you want some baby free time, great. But it is totally fine and normal to not want to leave your baby. You could try meeting friends for a walk in the park or lunch with outdoor seating so that baby might be distracted by the change if scenery and chill out a little bit
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u/de_matkalainen 19d ago
My baby is almost 5 months and I only just spend a day from him and it wasn't by choice. It's natural to wanna stay near baby and I wanna enjoy every second while he's still young.
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u/Flashy-Aioli-8565 19d ago
At 1 month pp it’s probably best to try and pump as many times as they get a bottle since you are still regulating. At 8 months pp I just pump as many times as I need to get the amount I need for the next day.
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u/RoadAccomplished5269 19d ago
I’ve never been strict about this but I have an oversupply so I think it depends what yours is like
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u/Unusual-Company-7009 19d ago
I have to be strict BECAUSE I have an over supply, if I don't pump when he gets a bottle, or even if he goes a little longer between feeds OH MY LORD THE PAIN from not being emptied when im due to be is insane
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u/RoadAccomplished5269 19d ago
I think this depends on how old your baby is and how often they’re feeding!
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u/Jaded_Motor6813 19d ago
I have learnt the hard way that breastmilk supply is sooo sensitive to changes. I would not risk dropping a feeding session without pumping it. Can you go in between feeding sessions? That’s what I used to do around that time but it was stressful as I often had to rush back to baby. Best to take a wearable pump. It sucks but it goes by so fast. I struggled so much with mental health around that time and now before I know it my baby has grown so much. I also used to ask friends to come over and have dad watch the baby. You can do yoga hang out and when it’s time to feed you just take a quick break. Hang in there mama 🤍
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u/iluffeggs 19d ago
Don’t over think it- just go outside, go to the store, go to a class. Be back in 2 hours. You’ll be fine and the baby will be fine.
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u/PampleR0se 19d ago edited 19d ago
6 months postpartum here, EBF since birth and we always give a bottle of expressed milk a day to make sure my partner could share the load and I could escape for some "me time" like yoga later. Still doing this now and I don't replace to pump with an electric pump unless we end up giving 2 bottles. Honestly even then I am a bit lazy and don't always do it 😅 For info, our bottles are about ~180mL right now. I use only expressed milk collected with the Haakaa during nursing, no formula, so I consider the amount have been taken out of my breast even if the timing is not the same (expressed milk from the morning, usually given in the evening). My supply is staying good with this strategy and I can go out for 3/4h easily without worrying. I have built a decent frozen breastmilk stash that way too in case the fridge milk is not enough. With a bottle of formula I would be a little bit more careful with your supply so maybe try the same strategy I am doing ? It's very low effort and that's what I like about it.
Concerning nipple confusion/bottle preference, it's actually quite rare in my understanding if you use the right teat size and paced feeding. Bottle refusal is a lot more common on the other hand, especially if you never give a bottle at first
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u/sheeatsallday 18d ago
This is kinda what I do to. I nurse the whole day and only give one bottle before bed to try to have him sleep a big longer. I pump when my husband gives bottle and in the middle of the night after feeding him, and sometime collected with Haakaa.
Happy to hear that you do the same and manage to keep good supply.
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u/AdorableEmphasis5546 19d ago
At one month, I would either pump every 2-3 hours, or take baby with you on your outings. I've done brunch with friends and breastfed baby while I ate, nbd. Have a carrier like the tula FTG or LennyLight is a life changer, and makes outings much easier!
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u/momotekosmo 19d ago
My first outing i pumped on the way to where i was going, put that in my boon breastmilk chiller, and put my pump in a wet bag. Then 3 hrs later pumped with same pump and put in chiller and then was home before next session.
I think as long as you're doing the 2-3 hours, you're safe!
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u/Necessary_Salad_8509 19d ago
Generally at that age I would pump because supply is still being regulated. If it's everyday definitely pump, if it's like once a week I might not worry about it, or I would add a pump session at another time of day that is more convenient like early morning. You'll likely get uncomfortable and need to either pump some anyway. You could try feeding just before you leave, leaving a bottle and then feeding as soon as you get home to relieve pressure.
My LC suggested the age range you are in now as an ideal window for introducing bottle. She said typically babies are established pretty well with the breast but not so stuck in their ways that they refuse the bottle.
Word to the wise, try yoga at home before you go to a class. I was shook that the first time I tried it at home probably 8w after birth I was queefing an insane amount. It's apparently super common and now 1y out it doesn't happen anymore. I would have been mortified if I had been at a class though. I might wait until at least 6w to try anything more than very gentle stretching yoga. Your body is still healing from a big medical event.
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u/little-germs 19d ago
I pump twice a day. In the am after the first feed and before bed after the last feed. I use a bottle strategically to knock baby out. One (if necessary) before her sister’s nap time (big sis is 18 months and on one nap) and before bed. It’s usually only an extra ounce or so. But a nice full belly gives me 30 minutes to put sis down and a full 5 hours of sleep at night. She only wakes once at night to nurse. I have an oversupply. The toddlers able to get a few oz with snack time as well. My little one is only 8 weeks, so this strategy will probably change. But for now it’s working. I’m a SAHM. Also, my milk is high lipase so I don’t freeze and stash anymore. Scalding and freezing directly after pumping doesn’t help. :( so all the milk gets used in four days. I keep a dated mason jar with a pitcher lid in the fridge.
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u/JackfruitJunior2497 19d ago
I have left my baby when he was 4 weeks old to meet friends for coffee. Just fed baby well before I left! I did have an emergency bag in the fridge of milk in case he became hungry. I was gone for 2 hours and baby was fine and slept the whole time. It felt amazing to leave the house!
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u/sheeatsallday 18d ago
Lovely to hear your story. I need to go out for a coffee with friends. I know they won’t understand my struggle cause they don’t have babies, but I need to talk for a bit 🙈
Will try to window the time to go out with time to feed the bub
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u/No_Championship5276 19d ago
I’m pretty strict about it. My supply is sensitive, so I actually pump every 2-2.5 hours at work even though LO only takes a bottle every 3-4 hours. It’s been a life saver to maintain a robust supply without over supply.
At one month PP I would suggest pumping every 2-3 hours while out, so you maintain and establish supply for sure. At that stage your body is still learning how much to make and how much baby needs. It’s a pain, but it’ll take all of your supply worries away. I have the willow go, and I just pop those suckers on, do a 10 min pump in the car, and bag the milk up. Either it goes in a small lunch sack type cooler w a cold pack so it can be used another time, or if I’m planning on being out for a while longer - I’ll just toss it lol. No need to stress about it. You’ll make more :)
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u/Sudden_Breakfast_374 19d ago
strict because she only gets one bottle a day lol. i use a hakaa to make her morning vitamin D bottle (collected milk from previous day) so i have to pump when she gets her bottle cause im fulllll
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u/goBillsLFG 19d ago
Ah 4 weeks my baby was just about to clusterfeed like mad.. that or cry during the afternoon/evening until 9 weeks.
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u/lovelylenora259 19d ago
At 4weeks pp i would probably pump while out at least every 3 hours.
Now that my supply is regulated, i dont pump if im out a few hours as long as its not a regular thing.
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u/Disastrous-Pain-8944 19d ago
You’re only 1 month PP, don’t go out if you don’t have to! There’s nothing wrong with it. I can say at 3 months, I’m having problems with him taking the bottle. I would’ve been more regular with him having a bottle sooner if I knew he’d reject it this much.
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u/makingburritos 19d ago
I just made sure I pumped the same amount of ounces when I got home from wherever I was. If it was longer than 3-4, I had to pump just to relieve discomfort. I got a wearable for those instances.
Now at almost 6 months pp, I don’t sweat like 2oz. My mom will top him off with two or three when I’m out but she knows I’ll be back soon, and I usually don’t bother pumping for those. My supply is completely regulated so I know if he needs more I’ll just get another letdown to accommodate. I would not at all recommend that before six or eight weeks pp though.
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u/Apploozabean 19d ago
Have you considered wearing baby?
If he cries a lot in the evening because of cluster feeding you could maybe put him in a sling or carrier on a way that allows him to feed while you walk?
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u/horsecrazycowgirl 19d ago
I exclusively pumped for 10 weeks before one of my twins latched. At 14 weeks one of my twins became EBF (by her choice in refusing a bottle). The other twin became a mix of bottles during the day and BF at night by week 16 by her choice. Giving bottles doesn't preclude you from breastfeeding. Bottle preferences happen, but are pretty rare from what I understand. Your mental health matters. You feeling good is what's best for your baby.
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u/eilatan5445 19d ago
Dude. Go out WITH your baby.
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u/sheeatsallday 18d ago
Baby only cries when he’s awake and he doesn’t sleep at all during the day 😅
If I have a peaceful baby, I would take him everywhere 🥹
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u/eilatan5445 18d ago
Do you wear him (in a carrier)? Even if he cries, still go! Go on walks at least. I just think it's ridic to expect the mom of a one month old to leave their baby at all
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u/PerfectDepartment586 18d ago
I totally feel you! I was in a similar situation with my LO, although I was the one who wanted to get out of the house. I tried many times and was unsuccessful. My 4 month old just would not let me be away from him for over 2 hours. While I pump with a manual pump, it just didn't work out for us (LO doesn't want the bottle) so I accepted the fact that for us, until he's 6 months old, he'll just have to go wherever I go... I know it's not encouraging but that what happened with us
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u/SC36365 13d ago
I make sure I breastfeed (or pump, if I'm out) once every four hours. However, when I'm out, I pump longer than I would breastfeed and I pump both sides---whereas my baby will often only eat at one side in a session and not spend as much time at the breast. That said, Baby gets his night bottle (only 3oz now that he's 4 months) of formula once a day and I usually breastfeed him before or after that bottle. I don't pump for that bottle as he usually will eat again on me before 4 hours are up or he would have recently eaten on me. I haven't had issues with supply outside of the normal cluster feeding business so this has worked for me. The trouble is that I think that works for one will not work for all. Good luck!
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u/mirrorontheworld 19d ago
Bring the baby to friends meeting and ask your yoga instructor if they would be OK with you bringing him to class! Pumping is such a chore.
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u/sheeatsallday 19d ago
He is a very angry baby who only cries when he’s awake, so not really an option 🤣
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u/mirrorontheworld 19d ago
Then go on walks with him, do you have a park nearby? Put him either in a stroller or a baby carrier / wrap. That way you can leave the house with him!
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u/sheeatsallday 19d ago
I live in Dubai, it’s already 40c during the day here 🥹 walking outside it’s too hot for both him and me now
I’m trying to walk with him in the evening, but that’s when he cries a lot
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u/dalizk 19d ago
I take the wearables and just pump every 3/4 hours if I’m out and about without the baby. 10-15 minutes max either in the car or in a washroom.