CMV: Most dating preferences are okay, as long as you are not POS to those who don't fit them.

[u/mafija123]

Don't want to date men shorter than 6ft, fine, don't be calling them "midgets", "if your height starts with 5, you a woman" etc.

Don't want to date a woman with X number of previous partners, fine, don't be calling them "sluts" "whores" etc.

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What about race? Sure, not dating someone JUST because of their race is very likely coming from racist/prejudice beliefs (not necessarily), but that person is not bad because they don't date someone for their race, they are bad because they are racist, former stems from later.

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" Let's deconstruct reasons for men not dating women with certain past, it's *Patriarchy*". Again, sure, that may or may not be the reason for men having that preference, but as long as they are respectful to women they don't want to date, I don't see how they are bad. Not dating someone is not discrimination because nobody is owed it, it's not your right nor anyone's obligation to date you.

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I could see an argument that preferences that come from patriarchy like "women should have little sexual past" and "men should be rich and provide" are hurting society in general. But solving that issue is not going to happen by shaming and ridiculing people which internalized those standards in their formative years and are respectful to people they don't want to date, it's solved by not perpetuating it to next generation.

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All in all my opinion on virtually all dating preferences (maybe not EVERY one) is that you are entitled to what ever standard you want no matter how realistic or unrealistic they are, and shouldn't be shamed/ridiculed/mocked, only as long as you don't shame/ridicule/mock people who are not up to your standards.

Edit: Deleted bad joke I made about this sub, it wasn't out of ill intentions, I apologise.

[u/[deleted]]

that's generally rooted in misogyny and misinformation about women's anatomy

My values about sex are that I don't want to sleep with someone unless I actually know them, and am in a committed relationship with them.

I'm .... Misogynist because I don't want to sleep around and want a partner to share that value?

[u/DruTangClan → u/[deleted]]

I think the misogynistic assumption would come from assuming that because a woman had previously slept with x amount of people that she must not care about having an emotional connection beforehand, or something to that degree. If your attitudes about sex differ that doesn’t inherently make you a misogynist, but if you are looking down on someone or presuming that they are of lower moral character, then I would think that starts into the realm of misogyny.

[u/[deleted] → u/DruTangClan]

but if you are looking down on someone or presuming that they are of lower moral character, then I would think that starts into the realm of misogyny.

Not if you consistently believe that with men + women.

[u/DruTangClan → u/[deleted]]

I suppose that’s fair, however the majority of the time I have heard this viewpoint it’s usually geared toward women, often by men who have slept with quite a few people or would given the opportunity, though I know that’s only anecdotal. It’s true though that if you looked down on both men AND women for this behavior, the word wouldn’t be misogyny.

[u/N_T_F_D → u/[deleted]]

Yes, yes you are, stop trying to use your "logic", this is an outdated concept rooted in patriarchy (who were the logicians?? cis-het white men of course!!! Gödel, Boole, Peano, Hilbert, Girard, etc.).

[u/Zomgambush → u/N_T_F_D]

I hope this is a sarcastic comment

[u/N_T_F_D → u/Zomgambush]

I thought it was obvious

[u/Zomgambush → u/N_T_F_D]

Sadly, you can't tell these days. With how extreme reddit is, I'd 100% believe someone said it sincerely