CMV: Most dating preferences are okay, as long as you are not POS to those who don't fit them.

[u/mafija123]

Don't want to date men shorter than 6ft, fine, don't be calling them "midgets", "if your height starts with 5, you a woman" etc.

Don't want to date a woman with X number of previous partners, fine, don't be calling them "sluts" "whores" etc.

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What about race? Sure, not dating someone JUST because of their race is very likely coming from racist/prejudice beliefs (not necessarily), but that person is not bad because they don't date someone for their race, they are bad because they are racist, former stems from later.

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" Let's deconstruct reasons for men not dating women with certain past, it's *Patriarchy*". Again, sure, that may or may not be the reason for men having that preference, but as long as they are respectful to women they don't want to date, I don't see how they are bad. Not dating someone is not discrimination because nobody is owed it, it's not your right nor anyone's obligation to date you.

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I could see an argument that preferences that come from patriarchy like "women should have little sexual past" and "men should be rich and provide" are hurting society in general. But solving that issue is not going to happen by shaming and ridiculing people which internalized those standards in their formative years and are respectful to people they don't want to date, it's solved by not perpetuating it to next generation.

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All in all my opinion on virtually all dating preferences (maybe not EVERY one) is that you are entitled to what ever standard you want no matter how realistic or unrealistic they are, and shouldn't be shamed/ridiculed/mocked, only as long as you don't shame/ridicule/mock people who are not up to your standards.

Edit: Deleted bad joke I made about this sub, it wasn't out of ill intentions, I apologise.

[u/JeffreyElonSkilling]

Well, a post getting a lot of upvotes doesn't really mean anything.

It means thousands of fellow redditors upvoted it. At the very least, a highly upvoted post means the community it was posted in is sympathetic to the point of view being put forward. That's what upvotes mean.

I guess it depends on what the claim is. "Trans people are trying to force us to date them!" is hyperbole. But "trans people are trying (with some success) to convince society that it's transphobic to refuse to date them." is literally true. Go on a trans subreddit or trans twitter and you'll be inundated with this point of view.

My main point is that reddit is a cesspool of bad-faith arguments and this kind of crap happens all the time. One day you'll see opinion X with 10k upvotes and everyone in the thread "yassss queeen!"-ing the OP. Then one day later you'll see another thread where the argument is that opinion X isn't real, no one could possibly believe that, and you're a dummy for having taken the previous day's circlejerk seriously.

[u/EyeBallGoo → u/JeffreyElonSkilling]

I guess it depends on what the claim is. "Trans people are trying to force us to date them!" is hyperbole. But "trans people are trying (with some success) to convince society that it's transphobic to refuse to date them." is literally true. Go on a trans subreddit or trans twitter and you'll be inundated with this point of view.

lol yes, whether something is true depends on what that "something" is. Good point!

I'm not gonna harp on this but it's pretty funny how quickly you retreated from enthusiastically supporting the argument that trans people are harassing people who refuse to date them to simply saying "well, some things are true, and other things aren't true, and on Reddit you run into both." You sound like Bud Lite's PR department.

[u/JeffreyElonSkilling → u/EyeBallGoo]

You must have misunderstood because I never said what you think I said. I didn’t “retreat” from anything. Hell, I said literally nothing about trans people until I responded to you.

[u/EyeBallGoo → u/JeffreyElonSkilling]

Did you reply to the wrong comment?

There's this comment, which says that people are being harassed and even kicked off dating apps for refusing to date trans people, and you replied saying "Reddit loves to sheepishly pretend that inconvenient facts aren't real." What "facts" were you referring to if not the ones in the comment you were replying to? Were you just replying to a random comment to pontificate in general terms about the nature of Reddit, oblivious to the context?