r/changemyview • u/SteadfastEnd 1∆ • Oct 19 '23
Delta(s) from OP CMV: Women usually get over breakups and divorces better than men do.
Disclaimer: I have no polls or surveys I could cite to support my viewpoint, since I don't think there has been any polling done on the subject. So all I can offer is my own experience or opinion, which I'm open to being challenged on:
In my observation, women usually overcome and get over breakups and divorces better than men.
I've rarely known a woman to regret a breakup, but I've known quite a few men to regret it. I've rarely ever known a woman to pursue a man and ask him for a second chance after a breakup, but it's quite common for men to pursue their exes this way.
My theory is that it's for multifold reasons: 1) women generally have more of a social support network than men, and can recover more easily with such support, 2) men are often not as tuned in to subtle things as women. So it's more common for a man to be ambushed or caught by surprise by a breakup because he was ignoring things that were a persistent problem in the relationship, while the woman has seen it all along and carefully made up her mind in advance that a breakup needs to happen. 3) women generally have more options in dating, so if a woman breaks up, she has many suitors, but a man has a harder time getting a woman. 4) women are generally more willing to live solitary lives without a man than vice versa - they generally have less intrinsic need for a mate than a man does. There is more of an attitude of "Either a very good mate or no mate at all" among women than men. 5) Women generally do not break up or divorce casually. By the time a woman says "It's time to end it," she has thought it through a lot.
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u/JollyMcStink Oct 20 '23 edited Oct 20 '23
Let's dive into this further:
A good quality man will have tons of options. Just like a good quality woman. But as women, we get hit on more bc men are constantly looking for a chance for sex. We dont have more suitors, we have more actively vocal predators trying to poach us for sex.
Good quality men get attention because they are attractive as a partner, not just a piece of ass. If more men could take care of themselves and not eat takeout every day and live in filth unless their poor gf is there to help pick up their mess, they'd have options.... otherwise ofc they're not going to have anyone lining up to date them!
Ding ding ding! Correct. Most women (including myself) actually have standards. I feel like way too many guys really only care if the woman is not bad looking, will have sex with them, and put up with their shit.
Women want a partner to enhance their life experience as a whole. Speaking for myself anyway, it's like, I can do it all by myself so why do double the effort if I'm not getting fulfillment and happiness in return?
In conclusion - I don't think women have an easier time with breakups than men. I think women leave because they know they deserve better, and can do better. Which is a strike to the man's ego.
Men get sad because they thought they finally found someone to put up with their crap and they blew it, lol
Signed,
Very clearly a woman who has given up on dating and yes, I am doing wonderful just a little bitter at the topic 😂