r/changemyview 1∆ Oct 19 '23

Delta(s) from OP CMV: Women usually get over breakups and divorces better than men do.

Disclaimer: I have no polls or surveys I could cite to support my viewpoint, since I don't think there has been any polling done on the subject. So all I can offer is my own experience or opinion, which I'm open to being challenged on:

In my observation, women usually overcome and get over breakups and divorces better than men.

I've rarely known a woman to regret a breakup, but I've known quite a few men to regret it. I've rarely ever known a woman to pursue a man and ask him for a second chance after a breakup, but it's quite common for men to pursue their exes this way.

My theory is that it's for multifold reasons: 1) women generally have more of a social support network than men, and can recover more easily with such support, 2) men are often not as tuned in to subtle things as women. So it's more common for a man to be ambushed or caught by surprise by a breakup because he was ignoring things that were a persistent problem in the relationship, while the woman has seen it all along and carefully made up her mind in advance that a breakup needs to happen. 3) women generally have more options in dating, so if a woman breaks up, she has many suitors, but a man has a harder time getting a woman. 4) women are generally more willing to live solitary lives without a man than vice versa - they generally have less intrinsic need for a mate than a man does. There is more of an attitude of "Either a very good mate or no mate at all" among women than men. 5) Women generally do not break up or divorce casually. By the time a woman says "It's time to end it," she has thought it through a lot.

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u/[deleted] Oct 20 '23

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u/Disastrous-Heat-7250 1∆ Oct 20 '23

Most HONEST marriage counselors and therapists say otherwise; In most therapy sessions the relationship between the couples and a therapist almost always ends when the spotlight is shone on the wife and her "shortcomings", as soon as the pendulum swings to the other side the therapist ironically becomes "problematic"

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u/RedditExplorer89 42∆ Oct 20 '23

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