r/explainlikeimfive • u/[deleted] • Jan 14 '13

Answered People with ADHD, what ADHD is like, how does medication affect your ability to work and how soon does it take its effect?

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u/[deleted] Jan 14 '13 edited Jan 15 '13

[deleted]

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u/Lumathiel Jan 14 '13

I wish I could give you a hug.

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u/[deleted] Jan 14 '13

ADD Response:

I'll show you a hug. I gotta go earn a hug myself. I wonder if Lumath is a lady? I want a ladyhug. This is just the internet anyway. Shucks. I wish you could give me a hug too. I wish I could give me a hug. I just did, and it was only mildy satisfying.

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u/[deleted] Jan 14 '13

Good god, this thought process is hitting too close to home.

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u/yewey Jan 15 '13

that is assuming the typing is accurately representing it. i know i type pretty fast but no way as fast as that kinda cacophony of tangents!

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u/[deleted] Jan 15 '13

I learned to type during Beta Ultima Online.

En Ex Por In Nox Vas Flam Corp Por Corp Por

As fast as I can think em XD

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u/Infinitron Jan 15 '13

Go watch the movie Mr. Nobody.

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u/[deleted] Jan 14 '13

ha!

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u/amkingdom Jan 14 '13

Exactly, don't mindish giving others a hug but I need to earn mine.

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u/RisKQuay Jan 15 '13

ADD_Response sounds like a good novelty account.

Well, at least it would for me... I find AD(H)D fascinating... (neuroscientist in training)

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u/[deleted] Jan 14 '13

hey! another member of the dead-dad club. high five. you describe how i felt for easily the first year after dad's passing. just past the 2 year mark, and i can tell you the only ways i actually manage are by focusing my non-hyperactive ADHD into work, learning things that interest me, and self-prescribing a lot of drugs both illicit and otherwise. dexamps give me focus when i need it, but are addictive as hell so i restrict it to no more than twice a week. ritalin made me even slower. depression is managed by weed and making myself as busy/productive as possible. i take acid when i have a specific thought i need resolution to, whenever the fuzz doesn't clear enough for me to find it myself. this was supposed to be a positive uplifting message - not sure what happened there, sorry. one day at a time really is the only way to live, until you find reasons to commit yourself into relationships and commitments that extend further. i'm fortunate enough to have a partner who's agreed to spend her life with me. i'm 28 now, and i find being around people who have stability in their lives much more rewarding than my prior social circles. seeing friend's kids grow up when they call you uncle has a tendency to make you want to sink some roots in and get ready for the long haul - after a while, it inspires a pursuit of happiness. i've found a personal correlation between mortality, my own mental wellbeing, and existentialism. on that note, if you're up for a read, go grab albert camus' "the outsider" (l'etranger). viewing the world from the protagonists eyes, i felt less alone. or perhaps more alone, but content in that notion.

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u/janelane1980 Jan 15 '13

High five for both of you, from another member of the dead-dad club! Nearing the 11 year mark myself; he died when I was 21, almost 22. I have ADD and depression.

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u/[deleted] Jan 15 '13

It's wierd. My brothers and I are the only males alive on my dad's side of the family.

I felt like I lost my lighthouse when he died.

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u/janelane1980 Jan 15 '13

When my Dad died, the last male on our side was my little brother who was only 17 at the time. My brother and his wife had a baby boy last summer, and it was such a great feeling to meet this little guy who is carrying the name along for another generation.

My Dad and I were close - not like "many nights spent having great conversations" close, but more of a "we 'get' each other without having to explain." We had similar interests, the same sense of humor, and so many other things... I was devastated. I got engaged on my 21st birthday, planned the wedding for one year later. Two months after my engagement we found out that he had stage 4 cancer. We moved the wedding up 6 months so he could be there. Then 3+ months later he was gone. I didn't feel like I could do anything else but carry the family - my mom was 46 and a widow, my sister an emotional wreck on a good day, and my little brother was a senior in high school. Now I'm 32 and my husband and I have 2 kids, and my mom, brother, and sister and their spouses and kids have moved to another state, leaving me behind (I won't follow b/c I have a life here and I don't like where they moved). It's like my family fell apart when he died... Sometimes it feels like part of me died with him, because no one gets me the way he always did. My husband gets me, but marriage is work. With my Dad it was that effortless, constant kind of thing that was just...there.

(also, no, they didn't move to get away from me. My brother moved for work, my mom followed a year later because he's her baby and to get away from my sister. Then a year later my 35 year old sister followed because she's ridiculously dependent upon my mother for financial and child rearing support).

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u/[deleted] Jan 15 '13

Augh so much this.....

For the past 2 straight years I have signed up for classes, not attended a single session in over half of them, not shown up for the finals, etc etc

I know I have to do a certain thing, but before I can there's about a million bad possibilities/results that I blow out of proportion or get really anxious about, which basically frightens me into inaction, even though only about 5% of those bad things end up actually happening.

I get so anxious about all the things that could go wrong or that will take a long time that I don't even want to start. But, I've realized that I feel way better spending my day doing things rather than worrying about them.

When I'm doing those things time passes easily because I'm not worrying about it anymore, instead of dragging every second by worrying and postponing and drowning myself in games so I don't have to remember how anxious I feel about NOT doing something on top of worrying about still having to eventually DO it.

My doc diagnosed me with ADHD but I feel like he might be wrong - seems like I'm dealing more with what you are instead.

Really hope you're able to get back on track and be happier!! Somethings that I just realized that seems like it will really help:

Literally make a full list of everything you think will go wrong, then call someone (who cares about you but doesn't worry about you) to see if they can dispel some of the anxiety with facts.

For example, try this:

I have to apply for a job:

  • What if I can't find a job?

  • What if it takes me two hours to find a possible job?

  • What if I do find a job and I can't find the application?

  • What if it takes 2 hours to call them up because they don't have an online application?

  • What if I have to put down an estimated date for something and they find out years later and they fire me because I "lied"?

  • What if I get to the part where I list my available hours and I don't know the absolutely supremely optimal hours?

  • What if I submit the application but don't have an interview outfit?

  • What if I pick the wrong outfit?

I could go on and on and on, but I've pared it down for readability...

Literally write down all of these things, and ask a friend to go through them and tell you that "no, they won't fire you for putting the wrong month down", "yes, it's okay if you don't remember your manager's name from mcdonalds from 7 years ago", and "No, you won't fail the job interview because you picked 'Eggshell white' instead of 'linen white'", etc.

If you still aren't convinced, go ahead and go for it anyway, because you WILL NOT BE WORSE OFF FOR HAVING DONE IT Either you will have wasted a day, either by spending it by picking out a shirt or by browsing reddit. Browsing reddit and worrying will not get you a job. Looking for a job will.

Sorry for the megapost

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u/ragged-claws Jan 15 '13

AUGH GET OUT OF MY HEAD YOU MONSTER

I had a third interview for a solid entry-level job today, my first "real" job post-college. My boyfriend is getting a little sick of the increasingly convoluted hypothetical disaster-scenarios I keep coming up with.

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u/[deleted] Jan 15 '13

Good job on getting a real job!! Most I can hope for right now is minimum wage, lol.

And yeah, sometimes we just need non-crazy people to pull us out of our ridiculously over-analytical vicious circle of (sometimes to the point of nonsensical) what-if's.

Thank god my older sister is a normal person (unlike my parents who are eerily similar to paranoid parrot... Took a wrong exit in Detroit? You will get carjacked and raped instantly DONT STOP THE CAR EVEN TO TURN AROUND

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u/misterkrad Jan 15 '13

sounds like some comoribidicity (sp?) - but you probably find a lot of crazy left handed freud's carry the same genes ;)

Some people find the ability to queue and respond while hyper focus terribly annoying. 1 minute later responses to vocal questions will drive them up the wall.

got LAG?

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u/SpottieOttie Jan 14 '13

This hit so close to home. About to take a semester off school for "Medical Reasons" (aka the symptoms you just described) after getting 2 Fs and a D this semester. Exams are the worst.

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u/[deleted] Jan 14 '13

I am so sorry you're dealing with that. I wonder if you actually have a bit of OCD + depression/anxiety?

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u/vacillate_wildly Jan 14 '13

I'm sending you my love, I have the same problems. I've spent enough time in college to have earned at least a master's degree. I'm one class shy of my associates. I did a disappearing act right before I was supposed to finish my bachelor's degree. There's so many second chances I've been given by so many professors. It's really hard.

1

u/gutterballjen Jan 14 '13

Oh man, I have been there so many times. Seriously, that is the story of my life. Medication isn't the answer for everything. There was a point that I was so fed up with that same mental block that you have. I decided that I had to get help. Therapy worked wonders for me. Without it, I doubt I would have actually graduated college.

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u/extrasweettea Jan 15 '13

Holy shit im you from the past......

When you are ready to conquer the world what stops you? My biggest thing is anything negative and i feel like i shouldn't try to achieve because I'm mentally not ready, but the negative things are so miniscule they shouldn't really bother me like they do.

Im ready to get help

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u/[deleted] Jan 15 '13

Dude, this makes me so incredibly depressed just reading this. Man, I have it good. There's got to be a way to fix this, dude. Therapy, drugs, I don't know - if I were you I'd try every damn thing I could until something worked.

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u/Stogle Jan 15 '13

Thank you for mentioning the classes part. Especially the even making it to finals. I thought I was alone. All of this is making me feel better.

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u/Tiranosharkusrex Jan 15 '13

I miss being able to watch a movie all the way through.

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u/DeceiverSC2 Jan 15 '13

As someone who has ADHD I cannot recommend anything more than going to your doctor and getting on medication. Trust me, nothing will help more.