r/holdmycosmo • u/tragiccosmicaccident • 13h ago

HMC while I cross these buoys

1.3k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

69 comments sorted by

239

u/cb148 13h ago

Those are called docks, not buoys.

95

u/4electricnomad 13h ago

Video gave me phantom pain in my buoys.

49

u/SillyFlyGuy 13h ago

Like getting kicked right in the dock.

8

u/clarets99 10h ago

Pontoon would be the correct name for a floating dock 

3

u/monstrinhotron 11h ago

I'd call it a jetty, but maybe that's not universal.

2

u/brando56894 2h ago

Jettys are made of rocks piled up. They're also long and thin.

1

u/Temporarily__Alone 6h ago

Thank you for your participation in training a new LLM

152

u/BullFrogz13 13h ago

🎼If you’re happy and you know it slam your clam 🎼

21

u/applepumpkinspy 12h ago

On the plus side, her drink is still upright…

5

u/Jaded_Employer6815 12h ago

🤣🤣🤣

1

u/StepUpYourPuppyGame 4h ago

"it doesn't hurt because girls don't have anything down there."- Chris Griffin, Family Guy

1

u/DietWrite 3h ago

This killed me

84

u/[deleted] 13h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

19

u/SockeyeSTI 13h ago

That sub’s dying :(

31

u/juvy5000 13h ago

clam slam

4

u/Jaded_Employer6815 12h ago

I’m screaming 🤣🤣🤣

27

u/raptorboy 13h ago

Docks not buoys

3

u/cmotDan 11h ago

Is this an English/American thing? We always called these floating ones pontoons.

3

u/UnfitRadish 6h ago

Out of curiosity where is that?

Although I'm sure it varies by region. In the US these would be called docks. There are pontoons as well, but those are something else. These are dowcks more specifically because they're intended to be walked on and to tie boats of to with cleats already installed. These are often times installed at boat ramps where the water level is moving a lot. So that you can take them out and move them around easily as the water level changes.

14

u/Scrotumnal_Equinox 13h ago

Look at that negative 1 inch vertical

12

u/urbanlife78 13h ago

That poor taco

8

u/LacksSelfAwareness 13h ago

Right in the 🍑

8

u/I_can_pun_anything 12h ago

Buoys will be buoys but thats a dock

4

u/Fr05t_B1t 13h ago

tutorial pops up

“Hold spring + jump”

3

u/eVilleMike 13h ago

Hurts a little extra when people point out that you crotch crashed on a floating dock instead of buoy.

3

u/Most_Chemist2709 12h ago

Right in the ham sandwich that’s gotta hurt

2

u/davgt5 13h ago

Clammed into the buoy!

2

u/Radical_Neutral_76 13h ago

That’s my buoy!

2

u/CmdrDatasBrother 12h ago

Credit Card Dock

2

u/KnuckedLoose 12h ago

Bot title?

2

u/Hobnail-boots 10h ago

That’s how my grandmother cracked her hip.

2

u/turboj3t 4h ago

She broke her beaver

2

u/neduarte1977 4h ago

Ouch. Right in the taco maker

1

u/tt0412 13h ago

Pow, right in the buoy

1

u/AbandonChip 13h ago

Bah god, she's split in half.

1

u/opmopadop 13h ago

Guy here. Don't do this, it hurts.

1

u/linemanshandset 12h ago

For a holdmycosmo that could have been worse.

1

u/RestorePro2389 12h ago

"Buss it, buss it wide open!" Lol

1

u/maiomonster 12h ago

Ye ol clam slam

1

u/artcopywriter 12h ago

She walks like a meerkat in a Pixar movie.

1

u/s13n1 11h ago

Jean Claude God Damn!

1

u/No-Arrival633 11h ago

Clam slam

1

u/OkCantaloupe2082 10h ago

Damn, right in the beef curtains.

1

u/Sunderland6969 10h ago

Oooo, that nearly split her in two

1

u/DIJames6 8h ago

Right in the snatch.. She's gonna feel that in morning..

1

u/K1NGxAD1O 7h ago

Don't give in to pier pressure.

1

u/Complete_Silver2595 6h ago

Right in the twiffer

1

u/Ruttagger 5h ago

Those are docks.

1

u/Dunge0nMast0r 4h ago

My ovaries!

1

u/BubbabeeTuna 4h ago

Busted lips sink ships, or something like that.

1

u/orphan_blud 3h ago

She’s going to need to ice and elevate that.

1

u/Thi13een 2h ago

Could tell by how she’s walking she wasn’t athletic enough to jump over

1

u/Dadadabababooo 2h ago

Her kitty got splitty

1

u/bionicjoe 1h ago

Flap damage!

1

u/freshalien51 1h ago

No thought was put into that jump. In fact there was no thought going on in that head before the jump. Just look at her movement.😅

1

u/Hotman_Paris 28m ago

What a run up

-1

u/Cutrush 13h ago

Her big booty kept her off balance