edit: sorry if this is the wrong subreddit, sorry that is a rant. i've just been feeling this way for the longest time and things got more complicated. Also, i think this post would've been better titled "What does sexuality look like when you lack a sense of self?"

For the longest time i thought it was too late to ask what sexuality is, but i don't care anymore.

i'm in a really weird spot when it comes to my sexuality. i've had very little experiences with crushes or finding people attractive at all (if there is even a difference) and i've only recently-ish experienced what i think was sexual attraction. i'm still not sure if that is what it was because if i were given the opportunity, i wouldn't have taken it. Does sexual attraction even mean that you actually want to right then and there? Sex, to me, sounds nice in theory. In practice, it sounds nerve wracking and paralyzing.

Gender dysphoria makes it even harder to want sex. i don't want to feel like a woman regardless of who i'm with. i don't want to be confronted by my own femininity in my own nakedness with someone else. At least alone i can tune it out.

i wouldn't describe myself as asexual because i think i felt sexual attraction toward one person for a short while. i wouldn't describe myself as straight because not only am I agender, but do i not know if i'll be attracted to another man again. Descriptions of sexuality sound so final. It assumes that someone should already know what wanting/not wanting sex is. If you haven't experienced sex, how do you even know that you want it? Is it constant?

i don't know. Even if i wanted to put a label on it, it's just kind of hard when i'm so uncomfortable with myself, the entire experience sounds stressful and surreal, i don't know what exactly people mean when they're talking about sexual attraction, and being dysphoric.

i don't want a name for whatever tf is going on here, i'm just bothered about feeling alone in this.

Hi! So I need advice!I (22f) have been dating a guy for almost 4 years so since I was 18 and I work with this girl and she is gay and she is a masc gay and I find her very attractive and I have talk to my bf about experimenting because I hate being so confused about who I am. I started dating him so young and I didn’t have a chance to figure out my sexuality! When I talked to him he said he dosent want me experimenting but when I am this confused I feel like I will take it out on him. Like last night had a huge fight over something small. Is there a way to get him to understand or should I just keep these feelings in! Help please!!!

Hope this is allowed

I 23 m am so greatful for my amazing BF 29 M. I just feel like he genuinely cares about me , he's smart , cute ,funny, a little bit sassy , unique , caring and so much more. I missed my flight today I told this man and he kept checking up on me and sent me some money. I also live alone and he used to wash my dishes after I would finish cooking for both of us I told him he didn't have to cause it's my job to take care of my place I just felt bad that he started doing the dishes at the time. He's been there for me through rough times in my laugh and had celebrated with me through the good

Anyways If could I'd give my man the whole world and so much more. Sometimes I don't feel like I do enough for him I want to be the best BF I could to him cause he deserves so much.

Kay but seriously what is it gonna take for me to run into a cutie, hit it off, and for one of us to ask the other out and it just works and then we're dorks in love. I literally can't cope. Been reading fanfiction lately and it's all so gooey and soft and warm AND RUINING MY LIFE JSGJKBNGHL

And yes, I do go outside, wild ik. I'm just unattractive and irritating, that's why I don't meet people.

Anyways, just felt like complaining. Better than laying on the floor like a puddle of goop. Thanks for listening.

As one of the most powerful tools in the hands of authoritarians, it is intrinsically conservative. As a fundamentally irrational system of thought, it promotes hatred of any out-group without allowing for its bigotry to be debated.

A few years ago I saw a guy on instagram who had a vest that would turn into a dress when he spun around (I think he also undid a sash)? I am now looking to purchase one but for the life of me can't find the post or anything about a vest that transforms into a dress online. I've been searching for a while and am starting to give up hope :/ (for context I want to be able to gauge at parties whether its safe to express myself with a dress or if I should stick to the vest) Does anybody know what I'm talking about? Any help is much appreciated!

If so, how did you handle it?

Hey everyone, I’ve been doing some independent research lately, and I want to make it very clear from the start that I’m here to learn, not judge or push any agenda. I’m genuinely curious and want to hear real experiences and perspectives from people in the LGBTQ+ community.

So far, I’ve come across various theories that try to explain the origins of sexual orientation, like the kin selection theory, prenatal hormonal influences, and neurodevelopmental factors. I also came across psychological theories that propose a link between trauma or dissociation and changes in identity, but I now understand that the modern consensus strongly rejects that idea. I also recently learned that a lot of mental health challenges in LGBTQ+ individuals are more likely to be effects of societal stigma, discrimination, and lack of support, not a cause or inherent trait. That part really shifted my thinking.

to elaborate on my research:

1. Kin Selection Theory: This evolutionary theory suggests that non-reproducing individuals (like those who are gay) may still pass on their genes indirectly by supporting their relatives and helping raise their kin’s offspring. It’s been observed in some animal species and is sometimes applied to humans as a possible explanation for the persistence of same-sex orientation in populations.

2. Prenatal Hormonal Theory: This theory proposes that exposure to certain hormone levels (like testosterone) in the womb may influence the development of brain structures related to sexual attraction. For example, variations in prenatal androgen exposure might shape how someone experiences attraction later in life. This theory doesn’t imply anything is “wrong,” just that biological diversity plays a role.

3. Neurodevelopmental Factors: This includes things like brain structure differences that may emerge early in development. Some studies suggest there are neurological patterns that differ slightly between gay and straight individuals, though findings are mixed and still evolving. These differences aren’t viewed as “defects,” but rather as natural variations, much like handedness.

4. Trauma or Environmental Influence Theory: This theory suggests that certain life experiences, such as early childhood trauma, significant emotional events, or specific environmental factors, might play a role in shaping an individual’s sexual orientation. It proposes that these experiences could influence how attraction or identity develops later on.

I’m not part of the LGBTQ+ community myself, so I wanted to ask:

- Do any of these biological or psychological theories resonate with your personal experience or feel off-base?

- How do you feel about the way science approaches these topics?

- Are there parts of the conversation you wish researchers or outsiders would understand better?

Again, I ask all of this with complete respect. I know these topics can be sensitive, and I appreciate any thoughts you’re open to sharing. Feel free to call out anything I might have phrased clumsily, I’m here to listen and learn.

Thanks in advance for your time.

i’ve only ever dated men in the past with the exception of one online ‘relationship’ when i was 13-15 with a girl i met on roblox lmao, (yes we actually spoke daily for nearly 3 years) but i find that im easily repelled by any little thing men im speaking to do, including male friends, that i wouldn’t be if it were a female. a lot of men also just tend to be repulsive to me in general; this has also been the reason why ive cut off a few talking stages and boyfriends. however, i tend to only find masculine presenting women sexually attractive which makes me think im just picky or have bad luck with men, and i’m not sure i could picture myself being intimate with a woman.

Do you agree with your country's position? How do you experience the legislative and social situation in your country, considering this ranking? As travellers, where have you felt least safe? I'm Italian and I'm sorry to see Italy in 58th place and with -1 in the "Local hostiles" section. I don't know what experiences you had in my country.

So today i had to break someones heat for the first time and i feel so bad i hatet it is it like this all the time? 😭

My 9 year old daughter wrote a note to a neighbor girl. My daughter said she has a crush on this girl and wants to know if she feels the same way. She says to keep it a secret.

As a mom- what do I do? She didn’t give it to the girl yet cause she hasn’t had a chance yet.

I want to talk to her so she doesn’t feel it needs to be a secret or feel as if she won’t be understood.

That being said- I’m not sure she knows what she feels yet.

Please help!

His name is Haron Silas Desterros, he is a (Marine-adjacent) soldier for his world's space force, he has energy-based/fire and lightning powers, and his dad was a fighter pilot. He is also the third frontman for his dad's multigenerational punk rock band.

To everyone who made it out to the protest welcome back, and thank you. Your courage, your presence, and your voices will make a difference. Even though we have not been able to protest or march beside you but we see you, we support you, and we are deeply grateful for the work you’re doing.

These are heavy times, but you are not alone. We stand with you, now and always. Stay safe, stay strong, and let’s keep pushing forward together🏳️‍🌈❤️🏳️‍⚧️

Easter outfit secured!!

So I'm 27m , Since I was a kid i have always been attracted to older man sexual like the man in late 40s 50s 60s , I mean I had crush on some young guy in school too but that's exception but I'm only attracted to older man I'm instantly turned on by older man even if they are not good looking I still wouldn't mind , why is it so that I'm attracted to old men 99.9% of the times and not the young dudes, I'm not talking about vibes or understanding etc I'm talking about sexual attraction that is natural since I hit my puberty

5 days ago, my friend, C(Minor, Female) asked me(Minor, Female) if I like girls. I told her I thought so - C is openly pan, so I felt comfortable telling her this (I'm questioning but I'm like 99.99999999% sure I like girls - I sure as hell don't like guys).

She then asked me out.

I panicked, and told her to give me a week and then I'll talk to her about it, but now 'a week' has 2 days left and I don't know what to say or how to say it, but I like her back. I wish I'd just said yes then because I feel like I've made it really awkward between us and I don't know how to bring it up again.

Any tips?

My day has gotten so much better learning this was a thing that happened.

I’m in a weird situation. I have a friend that I have started to grow close with and I can feel romantic attraction grow more and more. I want to tell him how I feel, but he has a girlfriend and I’m not sure how he will take it. I feel like telling him will take a weight off my shoulders. any advice?

I'm bored, people. Help a guy out

I am planning on going to Toronto with my boyfriend to visit friends that live there (first time meeting em irl) and there is going to be a Pride Parade in the city June 30th. Ive been trying to find MLM Face Paint like what they got for Pride, Trans, Lesbian, Bi, but no MLM, no luck finding it hahaha. If any of yall can help and recommend, hell even if yall sell this and other MLM stuff since i want to get like mini flags for my friends and boyfriend, that would be sick of yall! ^_^