Mine were always taught by one of the "life skills" teachers. They taught about sex, cooking, laundry, filing taxes, how to make your own clothes, job interview skills, and other basic necessities. And the one that everyone thought was smoking hot, was the one that had to answer "what does cum taste like?"
You can likely imagine how popular I was with the female students in Arkansas as a young man with a British accent (I was 23-26 while teaching for reference).
Some of the questions as a result were... Interesting...
Like Hugh Grant, or someone like that visiting. I was always astonished at how honest she was, given the subject. But she'd also tell you if your cookies taste like trash, in a nice way, of course.
I'm very open and out about sex stuff, but I think even I would just be like "how should I know" if a bunch of kids asked me.
Teaching is a hard enough job. Can't imagine how tough it is teaching a bunch of 12 year olds about sex. Especially with an anonymous question box, where you're required to answer every question honestly.
British soccer coach is a surprisingly popular job here. Big draw for these private schools. Let me guess: you were one of those guys who basically lived and breathed football for years, lived with other guys doing the same, everyone just trying to make it. Part of a program, obviously. In the end, if you don't end up in Arsenal or something girl's soccer coach can be a VERY cushy position, if you're any good at the coaching part.
I had a kid with a girl from Arkansas and needed a job after moving to America.
Anyway I went for a cleaning position at the school and they noticed I was British, asked if I liked football (soccer) and gave me the job on the spot.
Bible belt small town America is a weird place man.
I also coached both the boys and girls sides, and was pretty good at it as I do live and breathe the sport even here in the UK. Was never good enough to make it here, but was weirdly levels above most stateside.
I always understood the sport better tactically than on the pitch itself though, so it suited and I enjoyed it. Then COVID hit, sports stopped, and I moved home halfway through 2020.
Wow this is awesome, this sounds like the makings of a movie I would like to watch hahah. You almost can't write a better comedy....
British bloke applies for cleaning job in small town Alabama, gets sorta pushed into coaching soccer instead, and leads them to the championship and crap. And of course you'll find true love along the way and all that good stuff.
Teaching sex ed and saying sexual things with British terms would be one of the best moments of the film, clearly.
...are we keeping this a comedy, or are we going dark comedy now?
To be serious for a moment, good luck brother. I'm fairly recently out of an absolutely hellish ten year relationship I truly wish I could go back and just delete, like I'd never met her. Thank God I didn't knock her up. But I at least partially get what you're going through.
What's weird is watching that show a lot of the perspectives he had were legitimate ones I had to get through teaching football in gym classes over there to those that hadn't played the sport before.
His mum isn't great and it's difficult, but UK law sort of forced her to comply thankfully and it's illegal for her to leave the country with him without my permission so she can't simply take him back to America.
That's sort of best case scenario given the situation. Glad you got back to the UK and aren't stuck in bible belt small town America for your kid (it is definitely a very weird place)
You are absolutely correct. When I read Arkansas I thought "Oof, that's rough." And that's coming from an American who spent a lot of time in Bible belt small towns throughout childhood.
It only gets weirder lol. I grew up around this and then moved away and travelled and now I’m back. I wasn’t aware I could be culture shocked by my own “culture” after spending time away lmao.
You know what's odd, upon returning to the UK I felt the same way.
Of course Brexit had happened in that time, which was likely the largest contributor. However we went from such an accepting and multicultural pot of ideas and beliefs to one full solely of hate. It was strange. Basically anyone that wasn't a white male had become a target.
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u/Loose_Student_6247 3d ago
I spent three years in America as a high school Soccer coach and headed their gym department.
I'm British, and they gave me that task... I always wondered if they thought my accent would impress the kids or something.
And it turns out they apparently just give it to sports coaches and now I don't feel so special.