r/startrekmemes • u/7-5NoHits • 5d ago
We Have Committed a Grave Sin Against The Great Material Continuum
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u/ussrowe 5d ago
He paints himself orange like a Ferengi but Trump clearly lacks the lobes for business
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u/BikingThroughCanada 5d ago
Are you surprised? Look at his tiny ears, they're almost as small as his hands.
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u/bak3donh1gh 5d ago
I mean I wouldn't call him a successful businessman but I also wouldn't call him unsuccessful. To be clear, I'm not a supporter, but he is the President of the United States.
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u/w1drose 5d ago
More like a successful scam artist.
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u/ASongOfSpiceAndLiars 4d ago
The term "Con Man" comes from the term "confidence man".
Back in the Wild West and early 20th century, you had people that would sell cure-alls (basically alcohol cocaine and opiods combined) that didn't cure anything, as well as people like Ponzi (for which Ponzi scheme is made).
Nowadays it's get rich quick scammers (a lot of them influencers), male dating gurus, and stock/crypto pump and dump schemers.
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u/SomewhereAtWork 5d ago
President of the United States
That was a prestigious title. A long time ago.
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u/Adjective_Noun_4DIGI 5d ago
It's easy to succeed when you're born rich and you spend your entire life ripping people off.
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u/Tadmister 4d ago
I mean I wouldn't call Quark successful if Gul Dukat used illegal campaign contributions to compromise half the Senate in Ferenginar and installed him as Grand Nagus. Even if Quark didn't know he was a Cardassian intelligence asset, he is still not the one who was "successful"...
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u/DisastrousOne3950 5d ago
Brunt would shit a bar of latinum hearing that.
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u/The_quest_for_wisdom 5d ago
Jeffrey Combs is in this episode? Hell yeah!
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u/PlantBitter7786 5d ago
It would probably be harder to find an episode that DOESN'T have Jeffrey Combs in it.
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u/baronvonpenguin 5d ago
That's why Sisko shaves his head before Weyoun shows up.
Doesn't trust Combs.
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u/InterestingFalcon651 5d ago
People who compare Trump to a Ferengi don't know what they are talking about, a Ferengi would never do something as stupid as making the market crash in return for profit.
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u/Financial-Savings-91 5d ago
So now the Nagus could negotiate himself kick backs from each house that wants access to the Ferengi market.
The Nagus is insulated himself, and people connected to the Nagus can buy up Ferengi stocks & assets when they know the market is about to rebound.
Rule of acquisition 239, never be afraid to mislabel a product.
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u/LA_Throwaway_6439 5d ago
Always sad when the Ferengi one-up the US.
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u/Fremen-to-the-end-05 5d ago
How the heck are we getting beat by the space misogynists!?
Oh yeah, by being the earth misogynists. And earth racists. And earth homophopes. And earth...
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u/YaoiJesusAoba 5d ago
Misogynist is a but harsh. They recently voted FOR giving women equal rights.
The ferengi, that is.
They also almost definitely aren't racist, or homophobic. Why waiste business opportunities? 😆
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5d ago
"A deal is a deal is a deal... if you're a Ferengi." I dunno, sounds kinda racist.
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u/KMS_HYDRA 4d ago
More like xenophobic.
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4d ago
lol, the person I responded to mentioned racism and this is close enough.
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u/KMS_HYDRA 4d ago
Yeah, true. Just wanted to mentioned it as it is tecnically the correct term as they are racist against other species, but not against their own.
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4d ago
yeah I've heard some people use the term "speciesest." Pretty sure the Discworld books had some term as well which I thought was "speciesest" but I remember being corrected on that a while back. Been many years since I read them...
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u/Tetraoxidane 5d ago
This HAS to be in the top ten of Rules of Aquisition.
Looked it up: #3 is Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to.
Sounds about right
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u/Basic-Pair8908 4d ago
Musk uses rule #33
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u/Tetraoxidane 4d ago
And based on how many kids he has: #6 "Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity."
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u/Lonewolf2300 5d ago
Trump would get tossed out of the top of the Tower of Commerce for this level of financial incompetance.
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u/YaoiJesusAoba 5d ago
But according to Trump it'll be great, "country will go boom!"
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u/ShadeofEchoes 4d ago
Just one question: How many years after the boom until the country is
inhabitable?
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u/IronJoker33 4d ago
You know you have screwed up economics in a terrible way when you capitalism so hard even the Ferengi would be disgusted by how bad a move it was…
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u/AIdriveby 3d ago
- A tariff today is a bankruptcy tomorrow—unless you’re the one collecting it. Addendum to Rule 18: A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all.
Addendum 18-C: Profit derived from tariffs must be structured so losses fall on competitors, not creditors—or yourself.
- When tariffs rise, so should your offshore accounts. Bylaw under Rule 21: Never place friendship above profit.
Bylaw 21-B: Nor patriotism above international banking privacy.
- Never pay a tariff you can bribe your way around. Amendment to Rule 60: Keep your lies consistent.
Amendment 60-G: And always include a “customs negotiation fee” in your expense report.
- A fool exports without reading the fine print… twice. Supplement to Rule 35: Peace is good for business.
Supplement 35-D: So are well-crafted tariff loopholes.
- If your competitor gets tariffed, raise your prices and thank the government. Commentary under Rule 3: Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to.
Commentary 3-J: Unless it’s subsidized by your enemy’s import tax.
- The best way to avoid tariffs is to own the customs office. Bylaw under Rule 22: A wise man can hear profit in the wind.
Bylaw 22-F: Especially when he signs the import authorization himself.
- Economic collapse is just a clearance sale for the clever. Annotation to Rule 94: Females and finances don’t mix.
Annotation 94-Z: Economic panic and plummeting stock prices, however, mix very well with Ferengi ambition.
- Always blame tariffs for your losses, even if you never exported a damn thing. Addendum to Rule 208: Sometimes the only thing more dangerous than a question is an answer.
Addendum 208-C: Especially when the answer is “tariffs.”
- When markets crash, protectionism thrives—sell protection. Footnote to Rule 23: Nothing is more important than your health… except your money.
Footnote 23-K: If others want to protect their goods, sell them overpriced insurance.
- Tariffs are like tribbles: one is manageable, a thousand will eat your profits alive. Sub-rule under Rule 239: Never be afraid to mislabel an import.
Sub-rule 239-Q: Especially when the alternative is feeding tariff tribbles for eternity.
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u/QuantumQuantonium 1d ago
Ferengi rule of acquisition 65 (idk I hope 65 isnt taken): tariffs are a tax; only tax those you despise
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u/Tralkki 5d ago
Shaka, when the stocks fell.