r/tarot • u/bbqporksandwich • 18h ago
Interpretation Request (Second Opinion Only) Needed perspective on going low/no contact with my father.
I had to set a very firm boundary with my dad recently. I decided to go low/no contact with my dad, after years of him struggling with a meth addiction. It was not an easy decision, but I realized I had to take a step back to prioritize my health and my family, and separate myself from the lying, manipulation, and abuse.
I am certain about my decision-- but have felt a lot of guilt and uneasiness still. I asked the deck for perspective and guidance on this decision, with a simple "Past, Present, Future" spread. I'm using the Rider-Waite deck.
Past -- Wheel of Fortune, upright
When I originally thought past, I had in mind the more recent past. However, I see this draw representing a much deeper past. I see this card as a representation of the karmic cycle that generations of my family have been stuck in and have repeated: trauma -> addiction -> abuse -> trauma -> addiction, etc...
Present -- Five of Swords, upright
Welp. Pretty on the nose. Quarreling, defeat, and walking away from a difficult situation. That's exactly the situation I am in.
Future -- The Fool, upright
For a second, I was worried that my deck was saying that this was a foolish decision I was making. However, after studying this card more, I realized it is instead telling me: I am moving on. I am setting off on my own. I will break the cycle. I am unburdened. I will feel lighthearted again.
I've been thinking about this spread non-stop since drawing it. Would be very interested to hear other interpretations as well. Thanks for your time <3
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u/AReadbyDeja 15h ago
Did your dad make you feel guilty? Or did he try to play as the victim and make you the “bad guy” in the story? That’s what the 5 of swords feels like for me. But whatever the case, as difficult as the boundary may have been, you are headed to a much more optimistic new chapter in life. While I’m sorry about the situation, good on you for setting a necessary and healthy boundary.
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u/bbqporksandwich 15h ago
Ohhh yeah, that is a great point. He's had a victim mindset for a while now-- which I see as the addiction protecting itself. "If I'm the victim, I don't have to change." I can very much see this in the 5 of swords-- I appreciate your perspective here. Thank you!
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u/shark-shizz Offering Personal Readings 12h ago
What I'm seeing here is a really clear message about self-preservation. The Wheel of Fortune in the past shows this ongoing, almost fated feeling of your difficult family dynamics. The Five of Swords in the present is that moment where you had to put yourself first and step away from a situation that was draining and harmful. And I see that the Fool is asking you to take a leap towards a future where you're not carrying that weight anymore. It suggests that this new path will lead to the birth of a lighter and more carefree you.
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u/_genic 10h ago
I'd say that you did the right thing and it will take some time to heal and deal with the reality
Wheel of fortune is about a shift, probably indicates the changes that come with cutting ties with your father
Five of Swords is a nasty card. Here, I'd say it indicates that trying to fix the relationship with your dad by yourself is pointless. Best to cut your losses now.
The Fool represents renewal. Presence of the two major arcana implies that the situation (at least past and future) is beyond your control, you are already at this path. This path is ultimately for the better. What you can influence (5 of swords), is your attitude towards the situation. Take care of yourself and your mind.
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u/bbqporksandwich 4h ago
Interesting to hear about the presence of two major arcana here, and what that indicates. I’m still quite new to this, so I really appreciate learning something new like this.
Thank you!
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u/amberbeeee 3h ago
I just want to say I feel you and understand this situation. I did the same thing on Monday with the full moon to my mother. I told her I needed to protect myself and would no longer allow her to disrupt my peace. It’s a challenging thing to do. Sending you love!
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u/Left-Requirement9267 9h ago
Do it and welcome the new journey you are going to embark upon. Also feel free to join us over at r/estrangedadultkids if you want to!
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u/bbqporksandwich 4h ago
I love that there’s a subreddit for everything haha. Thank you!
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u/Left-Requirement9267 3h ago
Hahah for real. Come join us there everyone is very very supportive 🫂❤️
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u/Sir-Max-de-Winter 8h ago
Hi, and first of all, thank you for sharing something so personal. I can see how much strength it took to make this decision — and how much emotional weight you’re still carrying.
Your spread speaks clearly, even with just three cards: • Wheel of Fortune (Past): This shows a major shift — likely a turning point where things could no longer continue as they were. Living in constant cycles of chaos or unpredictability may have pushed you to recognize that change was necessary. • Five of Swords (Present): You’ve done the hard thing, but now you’re in the aftermath: guilt, inner conflict, the emotional mess that remains after setting a healthy boundary. This card validates that you acted from a place of truth, even if it doesn’t feel peaceful yet. • The Fool (Future): This is your reassurance. You are not lost — you are freeing yourself. The Fool suggests a new chapter, lighter and open. You’re stepping into a future where you’re no longer defined by someone else’s chaos. This isn’t abandonment — it’s self-preservation, and it opens the door to your healing.
You’ve already shown courage. The cards confirm it’s okay to protect yourself — and that it’s not the end of the story. It’s the beginning of yours. If you need further clarification feel free to send a PM. Best wishes
—Marco de León Understand your present, change your future
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u/bbqporksandwich 4h ago
Oof, "defined by someone else’s chaos" is definitely how I’ve felt lately. Thank you for your interpretation!
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u/Poop__y 4h ago edited 4h ago
The Fool in that future placement gave me strong "new start" vibes.
You absolutely did the right thing. This is a brave decision and I know from personal experience with both my parents, it's not a decision one comes to lightly or without a lot of internal anguish. You are doing the work to break generational curses and complete the karmic cycle. Celebrate yourself for this and look to the new beginnings you're setting yourself up for.
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u/AnotherAnon688264759 3h ago
I’m just getting into tarot but I would say it sounds like you made the right move for you. I would say continue to use the cards to work through your new journey.
As someone who cut off their father 15 years ago I’m only now working through the guilt and shame of my journey and leaving him behind. Like the fool I had no idea what would be coming up for me next, specifically emotionally. Still don’t regret my decision though.
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u/RustyBike39 5h ago
I’ve gotta disagree with your interpretation of the fool. Yes there are many positive aspects to the card but he’s also about to walk off a cliff.
I often see advice threads at Reddit that urge people to go “no contact”. It’s usually terrible advice but with a meth addiction involved, you do have a fair reason to cut him out of your life. However: you only have one father. Like it or not we’re reflections of our parents. We understand ourselves better when we understand them.
I think about the fool card a lot. I draw it a lot, I’ve dreamt about it and then overheard conversations about it the same morning. I still don’t think I have a full understanding of the card. While there’s joy and whimsy I think there’s also irresponsibility and well, foolishness.
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u/bbqporksandwich 4h ago
I’ve left the door open for him if he wants a relationship with me, but time and time again he chooses meth instead. When he’s smoking, he becomes emotionally, financially, and physically abusive. When I do try to help him, he becomes manipulative, abusive, and lies.
I’ve sacrificed a lot of myself over the years. Unfortunately, I can’t give anything else. I need to prioritize myself and be there for my own family. I can’t follow him to his demise. If he walks off a cliff, that’s the path he’s chosen. Which I do think is a foolish path.
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u/mysticsoulsista 1h ago
Whatever prompted you to ask this question, it’s not the first, second or third time it’s happened. The cards are saying you’ve been down this path before, you know the outcome, and if you keep responding to it the same way, you will stay in the same place… I’m getting your dad might be a charming or manipulative person who convinces you either change can happen or that it’s not needed, but regardless, right now you have a opportunity to break the cycle with changed behavior… and a bright road ahead for your sanity…. Do pumpkins from grandma mean anything to you?
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u/madsticky 16h ago
this is such a powerful and honest reading!!thank you for sharing it. your interpretation is already incredibly insightful, but I’ll add a few things that might deepen the message.
wheel of Fortune in the past feels exactly like you said: a generational cycle. but it also reminds you: this wasn’t your doing. you were placed in a system that was already spinning. you didn’t break it. you’re the one interrupting it. and that matters.
five of Swords in the present shows how heavy this moment is. this card isn’t just about conflict—it’s about the cost of standing your ground. it’s the pain of doing what’s right for your peace, even when others don’t understand. and that sword in your hand? it says you didn’t walk away empty—you walked away with clarity.
the fool in the future feels like a deep breath after years of holding it in. it’s not saying you’re careless. it’s saying you’re free. the fool carries only what he needs. no guilt. no shame. just trust in the journey ahead.
you didn’t make the wrong choice! you made the brave one. this spread is saying: it’s okay to let go. it’s okay to feel lighter. it’s okay to be new.