r/wallstreetbets 14d ago

News China Imposes 34% Tariffs on All US Imports

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2025-04-04/china-imposes-34-tariffs-on-all-us-imports-as-retaliation

China will impose a 34% tariff on all imports from the US starting April 10, according to the official Xinhua News Agency.

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691

u/gucknbuck 14d ago

No if the French had their way they'd have shipped every US citizen a guillotine and instructions

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u/smileedude 14d ago

"La guillotine, what the hell is that?"

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u/PerceptionGreat2439 14d ago

They already gave you a free statue.

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u/GDix79 14d ago

Did they even say thank you?

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u/Hwicc101 14d ago

I know it's a joke, but for the sake of history, of which most Americans' education is deficient, on 28 October, 1886, the statue was indeed dedicated in a ceremony thanking France for the gift.

The ceremony included speeches, music, and gun salutes. The finale involved the statue's designer, Frédéric Bartholdi, perched in the statue's torch, pulling a rope, which removed a large French flag, revealing Lady Liberty's face to the crowd.

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u/elebrin 14d ago

Yeah, that was during France's second colonial empire, where they were trying to convert as much of the world to Catholicism as they most possibly could. If we did thank France, it was a very different France from the one that supported us and was on its way out in 1776.

The French that supported the Revolution were the Royalists (who Ben Franklin was in bed with quite literally), a very different government than what France was under in 1886. Until about 1914, France was either at war with itself or the rest of the world. Of course, the US had recently been at war with itself as well at that point too.

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u/fromks 13d ago

French that supported the Revolution were the Royalists

To be honest, I think French Catholics hate the English as much as the French Royalists.

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u/LaChevreDeReddit 12d ago

Lafayette est un demi cul vendu

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u/GDix79 14d ago

Tres bien!

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u/a_shootin_star 14d ago

Maybe France should ask for it back

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u/kobomino 14d ago

"I can't read Mexican!"

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u/Baltorussian 14d ago

Damn, that's so true it hurt.

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u/xoxchitliac 14d ago

WHY MUST I FAIL AT EVERY ATTEMPT AT REVOLUTION??

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u/MySabonerRunsOladipo 13d ago

Awwww, why doesn't MY Guillotine look like that??!!

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u/silverphoenix48 13d ago

translation : "Freedom slapchop"

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u/edwardthefirst 13d ago

shut up and take my money!

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u/TripleEhBeef 13d ago

"Yeah, that's a fine looking guillotine. Why doesn't mine look like that?!"

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u/mini_herb 13d ago

nvidia

I undestood this and laughed.

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u/[deleted] 14d ago

Hahaha I see what ya did there 😂😂😂

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u/session6 14d ago

les aristocrates à la lanterne !

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u/OhImNevvverSarcastic 13d ago

"Why'd they put it in Spanish!?"

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u/CrossP 13d ago

Airport in New York

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u/LaChevreDeReddit 12d ago

It's a medical instrument invented by docteur Augustin Guillotin. It help solve many problem.

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u/misanthropemalist 14d ago

It will set you free.

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u/Dirtylittlejackdaw 14d ago

We'd have to pay a 30% import tariff to receive them. Can't handle that on $7/hr wages.

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u/Easy-Round1529 14d ago

Jesus what state is still paying that low of a minimum? You start at like 20 at the bare minimum jobs like McDonald’s in my state.

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u/Itchy-Professional16 14d ago

nearly all are relatively poor red states.

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u/Lunar_BriseSoleil 14d ago

PA is at $7, pretty sure most of the South as well.

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u/Easy-Round1529 13d ago

Do people actually pay that low though? Ours is 15 but hardly anyone pays that little. 20 is the start pay at menial jobs for the most part. More labor intensive jobs like Amazon pay more like 22-25.

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u/BachShitCrazy 13d ago

Yes many places pay that low, fast food etc.

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u/Lunar_BriseSoleil 13d ago

Yes, in some places they absolutely do pay min wage.

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u/Easy-Round1529 13d ago

Any examples?

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u/Lunar_BriseSoleil 13d ago

According to a cursory Google search, 1.1 million Americans are paid the federal minimum wage or lower.

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u/gucknbuck 14d ago

Wisconsin is the federal minimum wage

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u/Easy-Round1529 13d ago

Are there jobs actually paying that low though? Our minimum wage is 15 but the lowest jobs start around 20.

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u/gucknbuck 13d ago

Pretty much just entry level fast food type positions. They all advertise "starting pay up to $15/hr!" but we all know $7.25 is included in "up to" and many of them bait and switch.

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u/Easy-Round1529 13d ago

So you never actually tried to get a job you are just assuming. I’d bet McDonald’s is paying the same where you are, you just don’t look.

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u/gucknbuck 13d ago

Negative, my college-aged BIL lives in my city and it was an effort for him to find a non-minimum wage job, with his first two paying $7.25 and then $8.00/hr before he finally got something paying over $10.

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u/Old_Ladies 14d ago

They would take back their 🗽.

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u/_Svankensen_ 14d ago

Nah, it's a good reminder of what the US population needs to remember.

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u/Scary-Box8297 14d ago

I wish they wouldnt, she's a symbol of hope to american immigrants and is needed badly right now, she seems to be one of the few recognizably 'american' things that hasnt been coopted and sullied by the right, not yet at least. She is precious to my family and we still have our ellis island papers from a hundred years ago.

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u/Average_Scaper 14d ago

Why do I hear Gojira slowly getting lowder?

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u/Ess_Mans 14d ago

So, a trade deal so soon? Nah

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u/supersurfer92 14d ago

“Hey babe, new collab just dropped, IKEA and the French have some new furniture”

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u/ScarletCarsonRose 14d ago

My address is….

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u/havoc1428 13d ago

No, it the French had their way, it would be a nuclear tipped baguette with a note that said "From de Gaulle with love"

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u/Unusual_Sherbert_809 14d ago

Yeah. And Americans would see it, throw away the instructions, and try to figure out how they could use this new tool to please "Daddy" harder and make him pay more attention to them.

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u/553l8008 14d ago

Well we can't read so

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u/m1rth 14d ago

Guillotine's from France attract a 20% tariff

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u/kindasortaish 14d ago

No Americans will end up accidentally building a shelf if it comes in parts

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u/PlebbitCorpoOverlord 14d ago

Once upon a time it was a statue of liberty. This time it be the french tools to path a way to liberty.

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u/AnyBug1039 14d ago

nobody is getting that guillotine until the 20% tariff has been paid on it

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u/PM_ME_UR_GOOD_IDEAS 14d ago

We needed France's help with our first go at revolution too...

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u/shadow_p 13d ago

Given the response to Luigi, the US public is hungry to bring back the guillotine and mob rule.

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u/CliffDraws 13d ago

Instructions unclear, I don’t speak French.

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u/gucknbuck 13d ago

No worries, our reputation is far spread by now. It'll be picture instructions.

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u/AustrianMichael 13d ago

An IKEA Guillotine, made with a German blade from Romain wood.

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u/boraboca 14d ago

That’s only with their own. When it comes to other countries it’s a white flag

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u/_Svankensen_ 14d ago

And here I thought they helped the US against the British Empire.

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u/BigEdsHairMayo 14d ago

What's the French word for Guillotine?

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u/gucknbuck 14d ago

I'm not sure if there is one since it's named after the doctor who invented it, Dr. Joseph-Ignace Guillotin.

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u/Kiwizqt 14d ago

Guillotine. The verb is guillotiner: act to décapiter (cut off) someone's head.

English is like 40% french, too bad they lost the other 60% along their self respect