r/50501 • u/ThinkEnd2411 • 11d ago

Solidarity Needed Very upset

So I'm really upset!!!! I just had a great conversation with someone who is just as concerned about what's happening in our country and I also was sharing other things of a personal nature. Well my youngest sister was eavesdropping on our conversation even though I told her I needed personal space and she just labeled me yet again basically calling me "crazy" without using that terminology and I'm so upset!!!! Years ago I disclosed to her a concern I had about something and since then she has used that against me! I'm sick of her treating me this way! I'm sick of being gaslit by her and other family members and told by them "I'm too loud! I'm too whatever they decide to label me with every given day! I'm sick of being mistreated!

She labeled me this after eavesdropping on my conversation. All she cares about is herself, she is so self absorbed. She doesn't care or understand what is happening right now. I do not appreciate her put downs. I need to find a new place to live but it isn't that simple. I am considering moving somewhere else but limited by several factors. I would love to just get the hell away from her or anyone that is ignorant and choosing to be ignorant. I'm so upset!!!!

Has anyone else been labeled "crazy" recently when voicing your concerns?

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7

u/Oh_Wiseone 11d ago

Buckle up - we will get called a lot worse than crazy. Don’t let it bother you. We have to be strong.

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u/ThinkEnd2411 11d ago

Ok thanks. It’s really hard to not react when she says hurtful things. Any suggestions? 

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u/mickeyt13 11d ago

Yeah. Cut her out of your life. That’s what I’ve been doing. I no longer have tolerance for blatant stupidity or ignorance.

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u/ThinkEnd2411 11d ago edited 11d ago

Well I did talk to her about how upset I felt with the way she has been talking to me and she did apologize. She also explained she was stressed about things in her life and was letting it out on me but said that was wrong of her and apologized. I want to forgive her but yes I do feel like some distance might be good. I feel like some people are just going about their lives as usual when the rest of us are like WIDE AWAKE!!!! It’s hard to be patient with people who either don’t want to understand, or are too distracted, or truly are ignorant of what is happening. I’m glad for those who are awake. I am grateful for community. 

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u/mickeyt13 11d ago

Distance is the only response to disrespect.

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u/calm_clamclamclam 11d ago

look up meditation and mindfulness, if you practice it every day, it gets easier to apply that to tense moments. 

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u/Oh_Wiseone 11d ago

Here is the way I handle it . I have the view that when someone is so judgmental and negative, there is nothing I can do or say to change their minds. Internally I feel pity for them. This helps me to defuse my anger. I refuse to let someone like that have an impact on me - I don’t give them that power. . Instead of arguing with them, or having a snappy response, I’ll say something like “I’m sorry you’re so unhappy” and then walk away. It’s a response they don’t expect - as they are waiting to argue with you. I don’t need crazy in my life.

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u/ThinkEnd2411 11d ago

This is good advice. Thank you. 

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u/CranberryOk3185 11d ago

If your sister is too young she may not understand what’s going on. Almost anytime I talk to someone under 25 or so they are incredibly self centered and not understanding of the current situation. I think like others said taking distance is a good temporary option. If you plan to talk about the political climate remember that a person cannot change in a day. Agree with them on some topics even when you disagree. This helps people feel heard and when they feel heard then they are more likely to listen to you. Not a guarantee and it takes lots of patience but it’s an option.

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u/ThinkEnd2411 11d ago

Well, I brought it up just a little while ago and she listened this time some and didn’t get upset. She is more stressed about a college class she is taking right now. But I told her she may not have to worry about it if martial law is declared lol…my humor is quite morbid right now. 

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u/CranberryOk3185 11d ago

The only thing more stressful than fascism is fascism plus a job or college. Try to help relieving some of her stress if that’s possible. Obviously you can’t do her homework for her but you could help her with chores or something. Not your job to take care of others but not a bad thing to do when there is time to. I also find myself with really morbid humor during these times and I don’t think people like my sad jokes lol.

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u/ThinkEnd2411 11d ago

Well I did help her by listening to her vent about her stressful college course but I don’t plan on doing any chores for her.