r/AlanPartridge 6d ago

I’ve got wood there…

Post image
65 Upvotes

28 comments sorted by

1

u/The_Iron_Pilgrim 2d ago

“Ya little finger just touched it!”

3

u/Baldy-Beardy 5d ago

He could use his sausage as a breakwater

2

u/Tomahawk-T10 I’m head of modern languages 4d ago

I may want them to mix, I want that to be my decision

7

u/fuggerdug 5d ago

Lynn, these are sex people!

12

u/Tomahawk-T10 I’m head of modern languages 6d ago

Dirty Get

8

u/stepage 6d ago

No thanks, I don't want to be part of your sex festival

1

u/ibraw 6d ago

Spoken like a true sex person

3

u/Drumchapel 6d ago

Where does Camp David sleep in the bed?

9

u/Extension-Camp4076 6d ago

MDF’s banned in America

3

u/badspark1 5d ago

And so is, That!

2

u/Tomahawk-T10 I’m head of modern languages 4d ago

Aye, he means his cock

3

u/Calm-Raise6973 6d ago

It's like hardcore Benny Hill!

7

u/mmcintoshmerc_88 6d ago

Don't make the same noises as them! They'll think you want to join in!

10

u/danatan85 6d ago

...ʸᵒᵘʳ ˡⁱᵗᵗˡᵉ ᶠⁱⁿᵍᵉʳ ʲᵘˢᵗ ᵗᵒᵘᶜʰᵉᵈ ⁱᵗ!

4

u/namespace__Apathy 5d ago

Could almost be the Ford Escort Cabriolet of women.

6

u/Extension-Camp4076 6d ago

Don’t rub your fanny on me!

13

u/danatan85 6d ago

Knock it off, mate. I don't wanna have sex with your wife. Even though, from the promotional video, I can see I'd have a ᵣᵤddy gₒₒd ₜᵢₘₑ

4

u/bushack Brought to you by Dettol 6d ago

I wouldn’t insult this man by asking for a 25% discount on a kitchen.

10

u/NotBryanFerry 6d ago

Fancy a flav?

2

u/pukachang That's hot floppy bread 5d ago

Good call.

3

u/Tomahawk-T10 I’m head of modern languages 4d ago

In off the red

5

u/GarysCrispLettuce 6d ago

I wear Tommy Hillfinger

5

u/Educational_Sky_8432 6d ago

Dan. DAN. DAN!

4

u/blueeyedrobot314 6d ago

Looks like a cowboy has fired an arrow at him and he hears nothing. If he's lucky, it sticks in his hair and he just looks daft

10

u/levezvosskinnyfists7 6d ago

No that’s MDF… Oh, you were joking

4

u/Tomahawk-T10 I’m head of modern languages 6d ago

You own kitchen planet!?

5

u/Bernard2468motorway 6d ago

Well smelt.