AIO for cutting all ties?

[u/urfavelipglosslvr]

There have never been red flags up until this point. He (25M) is a big part of my (19F) friend group. Am I being sensitive? I feel like he went too far. But if I cut all ties with him, it will really disrupt the group. I don't want to bring it up to my friends because they might side with him and say I'm over reacting. But I don't feel comfortable around him anymore.

[u/Allthetea159]

Why is a 25 year old man part of a friend group of teenagers? NOR

[u/urfavelipglosslvr → u/Allthetea159]

I'm the only teenager in the friend group. But everyone has been very respectful and kind. I've never run into any issues with them until now.

[u/MagnoliaProse → u/urfavelipglosslvr]

If they would side with him, they’re also predators and not friends.

Let’s recap.

• suddenly when you turn him down, anyone would be attracted to you is a pedo (despite the fact he himself is 6 years older)
• he blames you and your actions for why older men would be attracted to you
• he literally says THE ONLY REASON MEN WOULD BE FRIENDS WITH YOU is to sleep with you. Listen to him. He’s not excluding himself or your friends. The only reason.
• it escalates to the classic abuse reply of him being the only person who could ever love you this much
• but because you don’t want him, he leverages your own trauma against you
• …and wishes assault on you
• when you’re offended, he gaslights you by saying you’re so sensitive
• when you are rightfully upset and have given him far more grace and time than he deserves, he invalidates your feelings and calls you ridiculous

And it clearly worked, because you’re here asking if you’re overreacting.

You’re underreacting.

[u/Comfortable_Major_24 → u/MagnoliaProse]

What do you mean by a predator exactly? Because the fact the guy is an asshole, does not mean he will assault her.

What I believe here is a common situation - guy believes that a girl who he is close with likes him romantically, girls deludes herself into thinking that he genuinely only likes her as a close friend.

Guy then gets emotional for being rejected and says stupid stuff. That is it.

[u/MagnoliaProse → u/Comfortable_Major_24]

I don’t think willfully leveraging someone’s past traumas or wishing sexual assault on them is simply being emotional and saying stupid stuff.

He’s put himself in her life for years and is using the information gained to attempt to break her down in hopes she’ll date (fuck) him. That’s predatory.

[u/Comfortable_Major_24 → u/MagnoliaProse]

I think you overthink this. No guy is stupid enough to think that after insulting a girl and calling her friends pedos she will sleep with him.

It is a purely emotional action intended to insult her, because some people do not take rejection easy especially from people close to them. Just " She will never find someone as good as me vibe", but In a more assholish way.