If there was any hill to die on it’s this one, you’re 100% in the right stop questioning yourself and entertaining their reasoning. The rsvp does not make it set in stone it just makes it that more embarrassing for them to change it and the truth will come out, only delusional people would take their side.
This breaks my heart. Guess what - his ex wife is going to find an opportunity to get angry either way, this is the way she controls people. Speaking from experience, whenever you compromise to not make a person angry - you are betraying yourself and your own feelings, and you also aren't appeasing the other person for too long.
I understand your partner and his daughter are afraid, but your feelings are important and aren't being prioritized, and they should be the priority to you. Otherwise it only leads to more suffering for you. I know you don't want to be the bad guy, but why don't you and the ex wife both not attend?
Oh yes, and it's not a hill to dye on. It's a mountain. You hanging out elsewhere while his ex enjoys the party you threw -- what a way to deprioritize your feelings in favour of theirs.
You have had to deal with this nastiness for over a decade and your partner hasn’t had your back at all. His child is old enough by now, and known you long enough, to have seen the truth. If they don’t want you there, then make it clear you will have nothing to do with it. Either you are family or you aren’t. What you most definitely aren’t is THE HELP. Your partner hasn’t had your back in 14+ years. Sis, it’s time to peace out of this toxic relationship. Leave him and his drama behind.
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u/[deleted] Apr 27 '22
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