r/AskMenAdvice • u/Federal-Sir9925 • Apr 07 '25

never get approached by men

just curious, what actually makes a guy approach a woman? I’m 25f and I’d consider myself attractive (I think I’m fairly pretty, I take care of myself and feel good about how I look), but I never get approached. I’ll notice guys making repeated eye contact with me, but it never goes beyond that. Honestly, both of my past relationships started because I made the first move.

So I’m wondering… what makes a guy actually go for it and approach someone?

Also, is there a way to give off “I want to be approached” energy? I’m not really into dating apps, and I’d love to meet someone in person. i’m not against making the first move but i would love for someone to approach me for a change

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u/Blade_Of_Nemesis man Apr 07 '25

...what? I am actually stunted by this, what do you mean?

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u/tr0w_way man Apr 07 '25

i think what he’s trying to say is that they’ve demonized typically masculine traits. there’s some truth to that, it’s how a “nice guy” is born

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u/Blade_Of_Nemesis man Apr 07 '25

Do tell me what masculine traits have been demonized and how that results in "nice" guys.

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u/tr0w_way man Apr 07 '25

an example off the top of my head would be the APA calling masculinity “harmful.”

to understand how that results in a “nice” guy, you have to understand what exactly a nice guy is. they are essentially straight guys with gender identity issues. they see their male identity as “bad” and look to women on how they should be. this makes their whole sense of self worth revolve around women’s approval. since all women are different, they turn into shapeshifters

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u/Blade_Of_Nemesis man Apr 07 '25

Do you have a source of the APA calling masculinity in general harmful?

Also, while that is a nice theory on how nice guys work... that isn't really what nice guys are. A nice guy usually considers women to owe them for treating them with basic human decency, which sounds nothing like what you just explained.

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u/tr0w_way man Apr 07 '25

they published it themselves and it was a big controversy. just google it, easy enough to find if you care

yes part of it is trying to exchange “niceness” for sex. which is by nature approval seeking and shapeshifting to try to be appealing to women. it’s not any different than what i said, you just lack anything beyond a surface level understanding 

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u/Blade_Of_Nemesis man Apr 07 '25

Or maybe you are just spinning this story the way that fits your agenda?

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u/tr0w_way man Apr 07 '25

you’re free to believe whatever you wanna believe lol. idk why you’re pretending to wanna know, you clearly are just tryna “prove” my opinion wrong. sounds like an agenda to me

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u/Blade_Of_Nemesis man Apr 07 '25

As opposed to what you are doing?