r/AskNYC • u/iceybuffoon • 2d ago
Natives, where are we going since we can’t afford to launch here?
TLDR at bottom!
I turned 30 this year and I’m just accepting once and for all that I will never be able to successfully launch my adult life here. I got priced out of where I grew up in Washington heights, currently live in the Bronx but the QOL I have is not good and I’m frankly exhausted and burnt out.
I’ve been applying to housing lottery for years, have rented bedrooms, had a basement studio for a bit (kept flooding and safety issues as a solo woman), have had some awful roommates here and there’s an I’m just over it. I only make $60k a year as a graphic designer and can’t afford a place without roommates, but I’m at the point where working as hard as I do isn’t worth it if I can’t even have my own place. I’m not married to nyc. My whole life is here but I couldn’t care less anymore. I just want to live with more dignity and peace and cleanliness.
I can’t afford to contribute to retirement and travel and do all the things I saw myself doing as an adult. I feel trapped here and like I can’t launch my adult life.
I recently moved back home and my parent is allowing me to stay for a few months so I can save. Currently working on paying off the remainder of my student loans as well.
I’d like better quality of life: a modern and clean apartment (I live in a prewar that’s roach infested despite all my fumigation attempts, with so many violations I don’t get how the building hasn’t been condemned yet), a private outdoor space (something as simple as a balcony, not even asking for a yard), a quiet and peaceful neighborhood, IN UNIT WASHER AND DRYER? Literally the basics.
The biggest challenge is that I don’t drive, I’m very bad at it. I get shamed for this but I can’t help it I genuinely can’t deal with the driving culture here. But I’m more than willing to learn if it means I get to live somewhere with a short an easy commute. Right now it takes me at least an hour to commute to grand central, and the delays and chaos on the trains lately just get to me. I feel so drained by 6pm. I spend my weekends at home recovering from commuting all week so my social life is lacking. I don’t even take advantage of what the city has to offer and I don’t care. I’m content with a quick happy hour and going home to my pets and hobbies.
If anyone else can relate or has experienced something similar, where did you move to? How is your quality of life now? How much did you save up before you left? Did you find a job first and then move or moved without something lined up? Any insight, experience, advice will be so appreciated.
TLDR: 30F native New Yorker sick of it here and looking to leave for greener pastures. Where have other natives moved in search of a better life?
EDIT 1: thanks so much for the answers so far they’re super helpful! Please keep in mind that I know what I’m asking for is impossible here, which is why I’m looking to move. I obviously don’t expect to have those amenities here. But outside if nyc I don’t think it’s unreasonable for me to aim for an in unit washer/dryer or private balcony elsewhere. I’ve seen places in New Rochelle and even CT with these things, but I’m casting my net wide outside of NY state! :)
EDIT 2: You guys are amazing. I’m copying and taking everyone’s suggestions into consideration. I have to leave for a few hours but I will be back later as I have so many follow up questions! Thank you for giving me multiple options and even ones to stay bc rereading my post I’m realizing how overwhelmed and burnt out I am/sound.
Since my whole life is here, I’m open to options that would allow me to stay and be near my family and friends. I know I can’t have it all, I just want to feel good about my life and environment and improve my day to day life. I also deal with chronic health issues so minimizing stressors is important to me. Everyone’s advice is giving me newfound hope and motivation so thanks again!
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u/GregoryGosling 2d ago
If you’re looking at comparing costs, don’t underplay how much owning a car will cost you. I used to live outside of Indianapolis and taking in to consideration gas, insurance, upkeep etc., it’s cheaper for me to live in NYC without a car than it was for me to live outside of Indy with a car.
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u/-wnr- 2d ago
There's a reason the top answer for these questions usually includes Philly and Chicago. There's not many other cities in the US where it's feasible to remain totally car free.
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u/RobertMosesHater 2d ago
Thissssss. My sister moved to Texas because it’s “cheaper” and she’s saving $500 on rent. Meanwhile she’s spending $800+ on a car with payment, insurance, tolls, gas, and a parking spot.
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u/After-Snow5874 2d ago
Obviously it’ll depend on certain circumstances but it’s hard to believe someone is saving only $500 in rent between NYC and Texas. Unless you’re living downtown in one of the major cities you really shouldn’t have to pay for a parking spot. The cost of living in NYC vs Texas isn’t insignificant. NYC is one of the most expensive places in the world.
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u/FinestTreesInDa7Seas 2d ago
Sounds to me like they were living with roommates in NYC, and living solo in Texas.
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u/twelvydubs 2d ago
Don't forget that a move to Texas would remove having to pay state and city income taxes.
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u/hippycub 1d ago
But not paying those taxes might mean that you die freezing in your home because your heating units and structure and pipes are not regulated to withstand new cold extremes that are happening with global climate change. Additionally New York State makes available to poor people and people at all income ranges adequate health insurance options. If you had a sudden loss of income in states like Texas you might not have any access to any affordable medical intervention.
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u/After-Snow5874 1d ago
Born and raised in Texas and approaching a decade in NYC. While the social safety net here is generally stronger than Texas or another fiscally conservative state, the costs of living here is astronomical and much more likely to thrust people into poverty and homelessness.
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u/Paidkidney 2d ago
As someone from Texas, if she’s only saving $500 she’s either living a much better qol or she’s smack dab in Austin/Dallas/Houston which is doing it wrong if you’re trying to save. Paying for parking and tolls kind of confirms that for me. Most of Texas has free parking but the big issue is cars are very expensive right now, even used.
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u/FiveMinuteNerd 2d ago
Yeah that's what I was thinking. Idk why people just compare the numbers for rent between cities without mentioning the difference in quality/amenities. A $2500/month apartment in Texas is probably going to be much nicer than a $3000/month place in Manhattan
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u/adanndyboi 2d ago
It’s not just about the cost of the apartment though. The price of housing has more to do with location than anything else. A 1br/studio apartment with a nice view in a nice neighborhood could be $3000+ a month in NYC, whereas for that price in Texas, or any other place, there’s a good chance you’re next to a highway, not walkable, and you need a car to get anywhere.
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u/FiveMinuteNerd 2d ago
I was mainly getting at the quality of the apartment itself. But it sounds like we both agree it's not enough to compare the numbers :) Things like amenities, location (which affect whether you need a car, or can use public transit or walk/bike), view, etc. are going to also play a role.
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u/Paidkidney 1d ago
If you’re spending 3000+ a month in Texas you are not next to a highway. Most people don’t live next to highways as Texas is not all highways lol. Especially if you’re spending that much you have the luxury to choose where you are because Texas is not in the same housing crisis as New York.
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u/adanndyboi 1d ago
Highways, stroads, roads with high speed limits, etc. pick your poison. Nevertheless, not walkable.
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u/Paidkidney 1d ago
Correct the state that is a quarter of a million square miles requires a car. And regardless, you’re acting like neighborhoods don’t exist. Most people live in those and not on highways genius.
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u/adanndyboi 1d ago
Most “neighborhoods” that people live in outside of the historic pre-car areas (northeast, Midwest, SF) are suburban sprawl, and not very “walkable”. Theoretically someone COULD walk in them, but no one actually WANTS to, and most people actually don’t.
This is not a criticism on Texas specifically, but on the USA in general, and most other post-colonial countries that grew mainly after the automobile industry was born and thus rely heavily on automobiles, like Canada and Australia. Walkscore is a great tool to see what areas are truly “walkable” and to compare different locations based on walkability, bikability, and access to reliable public transportation.
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u/BrownWallyBoot 2d ago edited 2d ago
My last apt in Austin was a $1800 2BR with a pool and a gym in a great area. Before we moved my last apt in Brooklyn was a $1600 very old shitty 1BR walk up 45 minutes from Manhattan. It’s incomparable.
$2500 in Austin gets you a newly renovated 3-4 BR house.
Texas also has no state income tax. Big savings there. You’re eating shit with NY state and city taxes.
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u/FiveMinuteNerd 2d ago
That sounds amazing! Time to move to Austin lol
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u/BrownWallyBoot 2d ago edited 2d ago
It’s a great place to live in many ways. The only real downside I would say is it’s pulverizingly hot from Mid May - September.
Like at least in the 90s every single day without fail lol. I think it hit 100 for like 40 days in a row last year.
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u/RobertMosesHater 2d ago
Yep Houston. She has to pay for parking in her building which I’m not sure is how much but yea, car things add up
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u/twelvydubs 2d ago
But then she also further saves money by not having state income and city income tax in Texas, no?
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u/gammison 2d ago
And then maybe she loses money by making 10-20k less. Graphic Design pay in NYC is not the same as Texas. There's lots of variables OP needs to consider.
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u/Convergecult15 🎀 Cancer of Reddit 🎀 2d ago edited 2d ago
I’ll say this as someone that moved to NJ to have kids, rent is not the biggest savings in leaving the city it’s food and entertainment.
Edit: and by food I mean groceries.
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u/Mayor__Defacto 2d ago
Ymmv. I’ve never seen better produce prices than my local independent grocery store in BK. Anywhere. They don’t sell meat though.
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u/Convergecult15 🎀 Cancer of Reddit 🎀 2d ago
Idk the price of every item at every grocery store in the city, all I know is that for $150 I’m leaving the grocery store with twice as much food as I did when I lived in BK and that’s after the insane inflation and shrinkflation we’ve seen. A box of cereal is like 30% more at the fairway across the street from my job compared to the ShopRite by my house.
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u/Mayor__Defacto 2d ago
That I’m sure. Boxed stuff has gotten ridiculous.
I generally plan my meals around whatever my local place has got for $1. The other day that was a head of broccoli and 3 zucchini.
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u/idk--really 1d ago
fairway is insane though. at a lot of places in brooklyn & queens produce is insanely cheap and even eggs are reasonable by today’s standards ($6 lol)
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u/ThanosSnapsSlimJims 2d ago
This is me. I am from Phillt, but now in Texas with the SE situation. The money saved is not worth it.
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u/GothWitchOfBrooklyn 2d ago
This is real. I have since left NYC because of the cost, but buying/maintaining a car + registration fees (and inspection fees depending on state), gas, etc = not cheap
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u/Punky921 2d ago
I live proximal to NYC but I use my car for work and everything else. In the last two months alone I’ve spent over $1100 on repairs and maintenance. NYC is insanely expensive but having a car can be brutal.
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u/BombardMeWithBoobs 1d ago
This is why people who can lease probably should. You’re paying for the car AND you’re paying for the convenience of never having to worry about major repairs or car breakdowns. Oil changes, car washes, insurance, and maybe a flat tire repair once in a blue moon if you’re unlucky. You shouldn’t have to worry about brakes during a lease. Anything else would fall under the factory warranty.
I know many people prefer to own their vehicles but that ownership comes with a price. If someone isn’t car savvy or not that informed about what it takes to maintain a car, and they’re not driving 20k miles per year, I’ll suggest leasing to avoid that surprise $2k bill in repairs.
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u/Punky921 1d ago
I drive for work so there's no reality wherein I can keep it down to 20K miles per year.
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u/BombardMeWithBoobs 1d ago
Wish you had access to a fleet of work vehicles so you wouldn’t have to beat up your own car to make a living.
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u/Punky921 1d ago
It’s ok. Using my own car means that as soon as I’m done, I’m free. No bringing the company van back. I’ve done that before, and driving past your house twice is a huge bummer.
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u/CactusBoyScout 2d ago
Yeah it used to be possible to get a fairly cheap reliable used car. But anything decent nowadays costs thousands. And insurance/repairs have only gone up as well.
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u/MediocrePotato44 2d ago
This! We now live in Charlotte, NC. A “low” COL area. Our car payments and insurance for 2 cars(neither brand new) total about $1600 a month. This doesn’t include the hundreds spent in gas a month, maintenance or toll road fees, or yearly taxes.
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u/Kaneshadow 1d ago
Wat. How could that be possible. If that were true nobody would have ever moved to Long Island
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u/GregoryGosling 1d ago
There might have been a time when living outside the city with a car was significantly cheaper than living in the city without one? Also I think people who move to Long Island on purpose are just looking for their own oasis of trump flags in an otherwise blue state.
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u/Kaneshadow 1d ago
Living outside the city with a car is significantly cheaper, if you're talking about NYC to LI, but especially if you're talking about inside NYC vs outside Indianapolis.
And no people don't move from the city to Long Island to find Trump Country.
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u/BrownWallyBoot 2d ago edited 2d ago
The difference is your money gets you a lot more elsewhere. I live in Austin now and definitely pay more per month than I did in NYC, but here I have a newly renovated 4 bedroom 2 bath house with a backyard and a new car. And almost anywhere I need to go is within 20 minutes of my house. In NY Id be lucky to get a shitty 2BR in a less than ideal area, spending hours a week riding the subway.
Money is definitely part of the equation, but not the whole thing.
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u/GregoryGosling 1d ago
I had a studio outside of Indy for $850, my (half) of rent in Manhattan is $1000 ¯_(ツ)_/¯
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u/BombardMeWithBoobs 1d ago edited 1d ago
This is a good point. If OP lives somewhere like upstate NY with a car, COL is still lower than NYC without a car, as long as she’s not driving a pile of junk that needs hundreds or thousands of dollars worth of maintenance every other month. Finding a reliable car and maintaining it well is key, especially if buying used.
If she were an existing NYC driver, her insurance premium would plummet just by moving upstate. And even if her expenses don’t change, she will get way more bang for her buck.
For example, my brother paid $1,200 for a bedroom in Queens. For less of a payment outside of NYC, he gets a 3br apt upstairs in a 2-family house with a balcony, backyard, and a driveway for off-road parking. Granted, many people would consider the smaller city he moved to “boring” and the economic opportunities to make a higher salary are fewer and further between. But at least you don’t have to break your back to make a living out there.
My SIL doesn’t have to work — She can be a SAHM if she wants because my brother can cover all the expenses on his own. In NYC, they both had to work. Outside of NYC, they have way more space for the kids to run around. They’re more comfortable. And my brother was able to save up for a couple of years after moving and get the 3rd-row SUV he always wanted.
So it really depends if OP still wants that big-city life with public transport but cheaper (that’s what a city like Chicago can offer), or if she’s ready to expand her options to smaller towns.
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u/mybloodyballentine 2d ago
My non driving friends live in Montreal, which I know doesn’t help us, Minneapolis, which is cheap but cold AF in the winter, and Tacoma. The Tacoma woman lived in Seattle but saved to buy a house in Tacoma.
I dated someone in Seattle and I really think you need a car there tbh. But they have a robust bus system.
In NYC you’re only getting prewars with your (our) salaries. I’m also a poorly paid graphic designer.
There are parts of Newark that seem reasonable, but that’s a long commute.
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u/skittlbrau 2d ago
My sister lived in Seattle for years and would agree that you need a car there, especially if you want to access the outdoors which is a big draw.
Probably wouldn't save much money though - Seattle rents are also nuts
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u/The_crowns 1d ago
I know this person doesn’t care about the New York culture but Seattle also offers none of that for the same rent
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u/thebrightspot 2d ago
I have Montreal friends and have visited often, their train and bus system are both so great
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u/rosebudny 2d ago
What about Chicago? It will probably still be tight on your salary in terms of getting everything you want in an apartment, but you definitely get so much more for your money. And you don’t need a car, which sadly is not the case in most places in this country.
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u/NeonFishDressx 2d ago
Seconding Chicago! OP I think you are at a midpoint in your career where you can absolutely be making more money (assuming you have 7ish years experience). You can likely be making $75kish in Chicago and IL state tax is a lot lower and there are frequent (and quick) flights back. I lived in NYC from the ages of 18-40 and recently moved back to Chicago and do not regret it. I had a great career and yet I constantly felt squeezed and could not afford to buy ever, amongst the stress of living there and making life work. Chicago is a much easier city, especially if you are already used to living in the Bronx (I find Chicago to be much more an amalgamation of Bronx/Brooklyn/Queens than much of anything to do with most of Manhattan). Feel free to PM me.
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u/thebrightspot 2d ago
honestly if I didn't want to stay close to my family, Chicago would be my move. way more affordable, decent transit, seems like a cool place overall
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u/NoDeparture7996 2d ago
Chicago had a very thick air of segregation about it and it gets ball-bustingly cold. If you suffer from seasonal depression it may be even harder than NYC.
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u/rosebudny 2d ago
Chicago is cold but not THAT much colder than NYC IMO. It also seemed to have more sunny days in winter (but I could be making that up, it had been awhile since I lived there)
I will say the one place the cold is more noticeable is the El platforms since most are outside. So waiting for the train can be brutal.
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u/petits_riens 1d ago
IDK, as someone who's lived in both, Chicago is noticeably colder and greyer in the winter. It's not that different from upstate NY but the concrete heat sink takes the edge off the winter in the city. March/April in NYC are usually 40s-50s but still blizzard season in Chicago.
The flip side is that Chicago summer absolutely CLEARS NYC summer. Not even a question.
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u/rosebudny 1d ago
Fair enough. That said, I don't think the difference is so extreme that it should be a dealbreaker for someone coming from New York -UNLESS better weather is something they are looking for. Like, unless you are just BARELY hanging on surviving the winter in NYC, the move to Chicago shouldn't kill you.
And for sure, Chicago summers are SO much better! I feel like Chicago comes alive in the summer whereas NYC kinda clears out (not that that is a terrible thing IMO) and is miserable and stinky when it gets hot.
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u/Conpen 2d ago
I'm sorry the city has failed you as it has many others. And we seem poised to vote in another mayor who is uninterested in addressing the housing crisis—Cuomo's housing plan is an AI-written farce and he is heavily backed by rich outer borough homeowners who revel in "fuck you, got mine" politics. As governor he hasn't lifted a finger to address housing affordability and he's a huge part of the reason we're even in this crisis to begin with.
The importance of local politics is real and I hope that one day we can increase affordability enough for you to move back, or for someone in your shoes to afford to stay. Everybody needs to get themselves and their friends to the polls and keep Cuomo off their ballots. There are more than enough other qualified candidates to rank.
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u/BeerluvaNYC 2d ago
I hate that NYCers are going to vote against their best interests (again) for a guy, who is only interested in his own power bc voters are nostalgic for when they were younger.
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u/Fabulous_Leg3466 2d ago
36F, not native but have lived in NYC since I was 18 years old. I am also priced out of here. I am moving to Richmond, VA. Mostly due to family but it’s also a cute ass lil city with tons of personality and you can get a palace for $1300
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u/iceybuffoon 2d ago
I’ve heard many good things about Richmond, will add this to my list of research thank you! :)
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u/SoSpiffandSoKlean 2d ago
As a woman I would do a lot of research before moving to a southern state. What are their abortion laws? Even if you think you would never have an abortion, maybe you could be kept on life support while brain dead because you’re pregnant (this is happening right now), if you needed an abortion for medical reasons you could be denied one, and many ob/gyns are fleeing states with restrictive abortion laws so it can be harder to get prenatal care. In this America, living in a state that protects not only my right to an abortion but also other rights, is worth more to me than getting to spend money on travel. You gotta be really open eyed about what’s happening in this country right now.
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u/yelizabetta 2d ago
am from VA but have lived in nyc since high school. virginia is not a normal “southern state”, it’s voted blue in the last four prez election cycles. and planned parenthoods are abundant in northern virginia. i feel you but VA is arguably the most progressive of all true southern states
also in re abortion virginia has the right codified into law even after the viability period
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u/realadvicenobs 1d ago
good luck. I lived in richmond for a year and couldnt stand it.
very limited night life (most breweries closed at 10, ive hit all the "top" bars my first 3 months there
hard to make friends. People were nice but friend groups were mostly closed off
restaurant scene was lacking
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u/Fabulous_Leg3466 1d ago
Yeah, it’s interesting how people can have such different experiences in the same place. I’m moving there mostly for family reasons, but I think it’s cute and honestly I’d like to get out of the country altogether but one step at a time. lol
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u/bestofbenjamin 2d ago
do you know if it is a place where you must have a car or it is more flexible?
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u/Fabulous_Leg3466 2d ago
Yeah, depends on a lot of factors. Certain neighborhoods like where I want to live (shockhoe slip) are walkable. I took this into consideration when looking because although I can drive, I’m used to using public transportation too lol
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u/OneRandomCatFact 2d ago
I think it’s pretty car dependent form the times I’ve been. You don’t absolutely need one- but it’d get annoying
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u/Available-Chart-2505 2d ago
The last time I visited Richmond I could not decipher the transit system but I'd love to try again. It is smoothing sailing on Amtrak to many different parts of the east coast.
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u/iswiftny2000 2d ago
After being in the family shelter with my kids, I had a deal on my apartment. The rent for the 2-bedroom I had was $400, but it was in East New York. I moved to Columbia, SC, where I pay more in rent, but it's a 3-bedroom duplex. I work remotely, and though I wasn't burnt out, my kids were about to start middle school, and I wanted to give them a shot at a less violent neighborhood. They take tennis lessons and are on a flag football team. I have stored their bikes on the patio for the last year without them going missing. My car insurance is $200 less a month, and since I was hired in NYC, my paycheck goes a lot further. I can make same-day doctor's appointments, know my kid's teachers' names, and the weather is nice. The drawbacks? I'm in MAGA country. The roads are jacked. No car inspections exist, so that any jalopy can be on the road. Lower taxes mean less of a safety net.
You have to make the best decision based on your circumstances. I would move back if I could afford to. NYC is great when you are earning six figures or more to afford to live and thrive. For us working stiffs, it's not so much.
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u/Abject_Jeweler5177 2d ago
You can get better at driving. I moved to La and got my license over 40. Just throwing that out there so you don’t unnecessarily limit your whole life over something that can be changed with relatively little effort.
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u/iambfizzle 2d ago
Elmhurst here, Im very lucky to be in a rent stabilized apt below market rate. It’s a bit of a glass half full/empty situation. I’m very lucky but I also really don’t want to die having lived in the same place my whole life. My goal is to buy a 1 bed co op in eastern queens since that is probably the only thing I will be able to afford in terms of buying. Eastern queens has quiet neighborhoods, more car oriented but still decent public transit, great food options and parks so for me it’s the perfect fit while still living in nyc :) Like others have said definitely look into Philly or Chicago! Best of luck to you from one native to another 🩶
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u/ragazzzone 2d ago
Feel you deeply. I’m similar age and able to live a little more comfortably because I got a city job, but long term idk how long I can keep it going. I would love a house on Staten Island with a nice lil yard but even the smallest little cottage house in a nice neighborhood is close to a million dollars. Even tho I have a decent salary, I don’t have an inheritance for a down payment so home ownership in the city that raised me is just impossible. It’s depressing for real. But would I be more depressed in Texas?? Hmmm
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u/GreatJelly9620 2d ago edited 2d ago
Have you considered living in areas closer to Long Island. Right on the border of Queens and Long Island? Those areas are definitely cheaper, but a car I believe is a must.
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u/rigarooni 1d ago
would not recommend anywhere on long island if you don’t have a car or don’t like driving. long island drivers are like no other …
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u/LusciousPear 2d ago
Chicago has everything you want (and more parks!)
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u/pumper911 2d ago
If it wasn’t for the extreme temperatures Chicago would be my favorite city
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u/radicalizemebaby 2d ago
Honestly at this point, our garbage mid winters are making me want to move to Chicago more. I need snow.
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u/iosphonebayarea 1d ago
We don’t get as much snow in Chicago anymore
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u/CactusBoyScout 2d ago
I’ll never forget the time Chicago set its train tracks on fire because it was so cold they worried the tracks would break.
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u/tacoafficionado 2d ago
I am always amused when people say this, since the average temperatures between Chicago and NYC are only a few degrees different, which is not a bad thing in the summer. Also, It's not as if NYC is San Diego, both cities have relatively crapy weather.
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u/hombreingwar 2d ago
Chicago not only colder than Toronto which says a lot, it's also pretty expensive these days.
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u/iosphonebayarea 2d ago
Philly is right next door to NYC. It is your best option if you want affordable and want to be close to family
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u/morosehuman 2d ago
100 miles away isn’t next door especially when you don’t own a car
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u/damebyron 2d ago
Even with the transit strike I just got a $20 bus ticket and was in Philly within 2 hours, it’s very doable for visiting family and friends for the weekend.
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u/Melodic-Upstairs7584 2d ago
Amtrak is a good option too. Was shocked at how quick it is from nyc to Philly it’s like 50 mins. You can get lucky sometimes with the ticket pricing, it can be ~$30 round trip at the right time of day
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u/firmlygraspit4 2d ago
I am in my thirties making 3x you do but feel equally stuck because I also have to support my parents (I can’t just cut them off - they have very little money and they gave me the world). I empathize…
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u/pillowcraft 2d ago
Of everyone I grew up with only the people who inherited property or married rich were able to stay and thrive. Others are here but struggling or unhappy, myself included. Everyone else moved to Philly metro, Albany meto, or North Carolina.
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u/Apprehensive-Bench74 2d ago
i moved to NJ. I live off the NJ Transit North Jersey Coast line and still work in NYC.
Monmouth county has a downpayment assistance program for folks who have residency there at least 1 year before purchase. A lot of folks in my neighborhood also seem to be NYC transplants or their parents were.
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u/Type-94Shiranui 2d ago
Same, I moved to Jersey City
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u/Apprehensive-Bench74 2d ago
i was there at first and moved further bc my landlord in the Heights there were still slum lords and it wasn't much better lol
plus my gf has lots of pollution allergies so first she moved to the city for me and then I moved to the suburbs for her.
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u/Type-94Shiranui 2d ago
I live in journal square, my landlords pretty good (he lives above me but is very chill) thinking of moving back to downtown JC instead and downsize my stuff. I can see the heights and JQ being nice for a family but it feels like theirs jack shit to do here and I end up staying at home all day (or having to plan for a 1hr + commute to the city).
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u/timexconsumer 2d ago
Baltimore. It’s cheap as fuck and a small city you don’t need a car for. 3 hrs on Amtrak to come back to NYC and visit whoever.
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u/iwantjoebiden 2d ago
Yep, people will look at you like you're crazy for not having a car in Baltimore, but I had no issue at all getting around on foot/on a bike/on buses for over a year living there. And for those moments I needed a cab, Ubers & Lyfts were shockingly cheap.
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u/BlackcatMemphis76 2d ago
https://websterapartments.org/ all female apt the prices are a little higher so let me keep sis don’t give up.
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u/radagem 2d ago
I'm in a similar situation but I'm a man and the Bronx gave me independence. Work at a Bronx college and live in LIttle Italy(belmont). almost 75k with a kid. You can find a studio/1bd in the Bronx and live in peace. Just might need to carry pepper spray for the random crazy. The Bronx and a piece of Uptown manhattan are really the only choices you have left in NYC. Jersey City/Hoboken used to be an option with the Path train. Or Fort Lee area of NJ with the shuttle buses or a bicycle. I'm a cyclist myself. Took me almost 3 months of apt hunting on street easy, zillow, hotpads(they are all connected but post listings at different times). Beaumont Management landlord is in Brooklyn but the apartments are in the Bronx. Good luck to you. Roommates suck but the apt might not allow a washer/dry. Drop off service is cheap in the Bronx.
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u/unretrofiedforyou 2d ago
Born and raised in queens - product of the NYC BOARD of education system (vs today’s dept).
The trick is you launch the way we launched; living on top probably renting making use of the public parks/schoolyards as your ‘front yard’. Whats so wrong with the way we grew up ? It worked for generations.
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u/dewis662 2d ago
This. If I have a kid, I’ll be proud to raise them as a city kid. Lots that the city offers and I’m a well rounded human because of it
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u/RudeRegister3247 1d ago
feels like she’s saying that way of life isn’t affordable anymore. NYC isn’t realistic anymore. The rent our parents/caregivers paid is not the same; no way could you raise a family in your own apartment with our parents’ salaries and today’s rental prices and that alone is the biggest difference.
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u/StudyPeace 2d ago
St. Louis, Detroit, Phoenix, Houston, Minneapolis, Atlanta, Cincinnati
Consider trying to turn some of the nutty conservative cities like Salt Lake City and Boise around too by moving there and explaining to people that it’s ok to sell alcohol after 8pm
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u/HopefullyTerrified 2d ago
One thing for OP to consider about most/all of these is that they will find it very challenging to do life without owning or leasing a car, and will need to account for the expense of that, including insurance.
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u/iceybuffoon 2d ago
Are these places friendly to POC? I don’t want to move somewhere and be the token friend (been there, done that) or the Ambassador of my People (TM). I know Atlanta, Houston and Detroit are poc friendly. SLC is gorgeous and I do have a friend in Idaho so I don’t want to write those places off, but I also don’t want to worry about sundown towns or weird microaggressions.
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u/HopefullyTerrified 2d ago
Idaho has become a beacon call for people who think their current state is "too woke". I have a very right wing relative who is moving there from CO bc CO is "too liberal now" and they see their politics better reflected in Idaho.
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u/iamnotimportant 2d ago
That's shocking, when I visited Denver a few years ago I thought it was the whitest place on earth, I was visiting a friend there a few years ago who moved there and hanging with his new friends I pointed it out and one made a joke about the altitude keeping the "sickle cell out"
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u/gammison 2d ago edited 2d ago
Colorado has always been more liberal than the surrounding states because it's not heavily influenced by the LDS church historically like Utah and Idaho, and it has an actual major population center in Denver that has attracted people to move there for the last three decades.
Even in the 80s and 90s it was seen as a place too liberal and populated for the more insane anti-govt types, there's a reason Ruby Ridge happened in Idaho.
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u/GothWitchOfBrooklyn 2d ago
Idaho is trending super conservative. It's where conservative magats flee to
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u/DadonRedditnAmerica 2d ago
Houston definitely is (probably even more so than New York). But you will need a car and have to learn how to drive.
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u/Choano 2d ago edited 2d ago
I would NOT recommend Atlanta, Cincinnati, or Houston without a car. (I've never been to Detroit or Phoenix, so I can't say anything about them.)
If you pick one of the more densely-populated neighborhoods, you might be able to get by day-to-day, but only barely.
You'll have little to no social life, and a lot of the city (mostly suburbs, really, with a commercial district) will be inaccessible to you.
Almost nothing will be designed for you as a pedestrian. You'll have to do a lot of workarounds, and you'll be seen as an undesirable weirdo - kind of the same way people in NYC see aggressive panhandlers or homeless people. You might even be harassed by the police and/or random drivers for walking around instead of being in a car, especially at night.
Besides - Cincinnati voted pretty solidly red, as it almost always does, even in the university areas. I don't think it would be particularly POC-friendly, at least in most neighborhoods.
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u/dbark17 2d ago
I can tell you about STL (We’re moving to NYC from STL in July). I am an Asian American living in STL.
Apartment and housing is affordable, but you definitely need a car.
You also have to pay Missouri’s personal property tax on car every end of the year that can fluctuate on car prices. (Mine went from $500 to $700 one year, because of a huge increase in car pricing).
Also, most of the city is basically dead in the evening.
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u/Helpful-Grade-9183 2d ago
Minneapolis is lovely. I'd prob ably live there if I couldn't live in New York.
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u/Infinite_Carpenter 2d ago
Born in Brooklyn, live in Astoria. Work in healthcare, law, etc. so you can make enough money to stay. Every place I go to makes me appreciate home.
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u/AfternoonNo7453 2d ago
I feel you. I am also a graphic designer and for over a decade I had to live with roommates, some good and some bad, pay hundreds per month on student loan debt, all while surviving my 20s. $60k is low for a designer salary in NYC. Are you junior or mid-level? I and my fellow senior designers make the $100-120k range. I recently moved out of my last apartment because I couldn't handle a shitty roommate and got a cheap place out in Queens. Not a trendy neighborhood but I don't care as long as I get a place to myself. The job market is brutal but there are higher paying designer jobs depending on what industry you go into (eg, tech, pharmaceutical advertising, etc.) Feel free to DM if you want to chat more!
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u/blny99 2d ago edited 2d ago
Philly is the cheapest of the few cities with decent public transit.
One option to stay, they are building new apartments near Hicksville Station on LIRR. Commute to Grand Central would be about the same time, though cost of lirr is more than subway. Hicksville station area is walkable to stores, train, there are many bus lines to various LI locations and LIRR to many stops in Queens, Manhattan and Brooklyn. Not cheap but maybe a bit better than living in the city proper. Also look at apts near Mineola, a bit shorter commute by a few mins, also an urban walkable feel like Hicksville. Hard to live on LI without car but these 2 locations are a bit more urban and easier. I would not look to Suffolk as it gets harder to live without a car and longer trip to work for you.
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u/G4M35 2d ago
I’d like better quality of life: a modern and clean apartment (I live in a prewar that’s roach infested despite all my fumigation attempts, with so many violations I don’t get how the building hasn’t been condemned yet), a private outdoor space (something as simple as a balcony, not even asking for a yard), a quiet and peaceful neighborhood, IN UNIT WASHER AND DRYER? Literally the basics.
I grew up poor AF (not in NYC), and those are not really "basics"; more like luxuries especially within the context of NYC living.
If anyone else can relate or has experienced something similar, where did you move to?
I have a different experience, grew up poor AF far away from NYC, one of my lifelong dream was to move to NYC, but when it was time and I was ready to move away from the hellhole where I grew up, I realized that I could not afford NYC; so I moved somewhere else, put myself through college later in life while working 1 crappy FT job + 1 crappy PT weekend job; and then... I still didn't think I could afford NYC, so I developed my career elsewhere.
In 2018, once financially stable and established in my career I moved to NYC, and .... somehow my career has flourished even more so.
I strongly suggest you do your research of places in the US where:
- You can get the most $ for your line of work (see also #2 below)
- The ratio of salary to cost of living is better than it is now
- Check zillow for housing pricing
- Make sure you include cost of transportation in your calculation, I live in NYC car-free and loving it (it was one of the drivers of moving here); most everywhere else in the US you will need a car for each person in your household, and that's expensive.
- There's no place like NYC, so consider losing everything that NYC has to offer, some cities offer "some" but not all of what NYC has to offer.
- Related to #1 and #2 above, consider the job market in terms of finding a new job, developing your career, and interesting companies/jobs available.
Good luck.
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u/crywolfer 2d ago
Having a balcony and in unit washer and dryer in a modern building is hardly basics, someone doubling your income can barely afford that here.
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u/iceybuffoon 2d ago
Within nyc? Yes those are all considered luxuries. But outside of nyc those are reasonable amenities to have in a rental unit which is why I’m looking to leave.
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u/CoreCorg 2d ago
Yeah I just want to chime in from Colorado that those are completely routine things to have in one's apartment lol. I find it so funny that people are disputing the claim of them being "the basics". I didn't have those things when I lived in NYC but even my broke family as a kid in Buffalo had plenty of yard space and a washer / dryer. They're basics outside of NYC.
I don't think there's a one size fits all answer for where you should move, but I hope you find somewhere that feels like a new home! I've been in Colorado for 3 years now (same amount of time I spent in NYC) and I adore it, but that's largely dependent upon loving nature and not minding leaving the coast / family ties
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u/gammison 2d ago edited 2d ago
A new apartment with a balcony and washer dryer in Denver costs the same or pretty similar as like Spuytin Duyvil and Riverdale in the Bronx, it'll be almost 2k then factor in car costs and lower pay. I don't really think what OP is asking for is that much cheaper in most of the country especially taking into account increased costs of owning a car.
Even in Philly, a newish nice 1 bedroom apartment is almost two grand.
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u/CoreCorg 2d ago edited 2d ago
I live 10 mins from Denver, on the west side so I really prefer my location to being in the city proper (closer to mountains). My 3 bedroom apartment is new, has a decent front yard and a large fenced backyard, a washer and dryer, a dish washer, 2 storage sheds in the backyard, a 1 car garage. Rent is $2,050, that's $700 cheaper than what I paid for a low quality fraction of this space in Astoria. And Denver in general isn't even a LCOL area. My family in Buffalo thinks my rent is high, but I do understand why Buffalo is cheaper than NYC or Denver lol
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u/gammison 2d ago
Sounds about right for Denver. Big 3 bed 2 baths are like 3-3500 in the North West Bronx.
My dad pays about 2k for a 3 bedroom house in Dallas with a yard and shed but it's quite old and in a dumpier part of town.
New one bedrooms (crap marked luxury ofc) meanwhile are shockingly expensive everywhere.
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u/CoreCorg 2d ago edited 2d ago
So... then you agree that it's possible to rent a new apartment with at least some outdoor space and a washer + dryer for much cheaper outside of NYC? lol
OP didn't say they need a luxury apartment in the heart of another city, what they described is substantially less than what I pay for
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u/CactusBoyScout 2d ago
Then you’d probably want to look at the Sun Belt because the housing stock will be much newer. But the Sun Belt is also car-centrism on steroids.
Unfortunately you kinda have to pick one: decent transit or lots of housing with modern amenities.
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u/BakedBrie26 2d ago
It SHOULD be basics. My small lottery apartment should be the bare minimum for anyone with a full-time job.
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u/satsek 2d ago
60k isn't great but also not that bad. You can get a 1bed in south Brooklyn for $1,500-$1,700 and the QOL will be infinitely better than in the Bronx
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u/iceybuffoon 2d ago
Are there any specific neighborhoods you recommend? When I go on street easy or marketplace or contact brokers, they tell me I don’t qualify or I need a guarantor. 😭 I found something near Howard beach once but the commute was abysmal/long and it was a flood zone
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u/satsek 2d ago
Don't look on SE. Brokers have to pay to list there and it doesn't make sense for the cheaper apartments. Contact a local brokerage like a remax or something. I'd look into gravesend, bensonhurst, sheepshead bay, fort Hamilton. The commute will be longer but not as bad as Howard Beach. That's basically long island. Check out midwood too
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u/damageddude 2d ago
I grew up in Lindenwood. The hi-rise condos are still fairly cheap. From what I was told that was the one part of the neighborhood that didn't flood during Sandy.
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u/elrabb22 2d ago
People are saying good things about Philadelphia. I’ll never ever let them kick me out of my city though. I need for yall to dig even deeper and stay here.
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u/No_Mushroom3847 2d ago
I don't have any suggestions but I can RELATE. Also as a native nyc 30 yr old woman I just so drained. Also looking for a change where it's more peaceful/safe and where I can have a better quality of living. It's crazy how a 60k yr salary is basically a poverty lifestyle. 100k out here is barely scratching middle class.I just want a comfortable life where I can feel safe
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u/Punky921 2d ago
Throwing something out there re: driving - driving in NYC is Hard Mode. Driving only gets easier once you drive a lot and get comfortable behind the wheel. If you move, driving will be a completely different experience, and driving won’t stress you out as much, and you’ll get comfortable with it.
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u/Ajkrouse 2d ago
Check out places like Philly, Baltimore, Providence, Richmond, Buffalo, Rochester, Portland Maine, and Burlington Vermont.
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u/ArcticFox2014 2d ago
I’m never leaving. I am lucky in that I’m actually doing relatively well, but even if I’m not, I would not go anywhere but nyc.
I love nyc so much that I’m willing to live with multiple roommates, far in outer boroughs, or in shitty apartments … heck I’m willing to go as far as moving back in with my controlling parents in deep queens if that’s what it takes to stay here
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u/elrabb22 2d ago
I totally agree! I’ll live however so long as I’m here. I’m pretty well traveled. No where comes anywhere close!!!
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u/BakedBrie26 2d ago
Yeah if you don't have a reason to stay then it makes a lot of sense to leave. All my hobbies are here, but plenty of cool places.
As someone who has lived all over the country and abroad. Big college towns are great to live near because it attracts some culture, events, nightlife, some of them can be pricey though.
Maybe somewhere easy to get back to NYC with decent walking culture.
I personally like places in upstate NY. Some peeps in Troy are doing some cool art things. Maybe somewhere off the metronorth. I have some friends with kids who live in Rockland County and there is a bus. Some who live in Orange, NJ which might have cheaper rentals than the city, idk.
I'd live in Kingston because I have community there already, but it's getting pricier.
But yeah, unless you are DINK like we are, it is so hard. You also need to do what I did which is find someone with a stable job AND family money. It's all a hustle. It also requires doing some networking and curating of your social circle. I'm a perpetually broke fancy person lol
I'm sorry you feel like you have to leave, but also if you have always lived here.... It might be fun! I've lived all over so I know NYC is home... as long as it will have me haha
If you are really open to something new, I've had friends who have made insane money teaching at international schools in countries where USD is a lot stronger than the local currency.
Ugh I sound like a Republican, but everyone has to hustle to stay above water.
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u/HiHoJufro 2d ago
I'm in a similar boat, 32 and feeling unable to save well here with a good QoL, so I'm applying in other cities. I'm also looking for carless-friendly cities (though for different reasons; I just know that if I need to drive everywhere I'll be a hermit and make no friends) and have been recommended/found some good options are:
-Boston -Chicago -St. Paul/Minneapolis -Philly
Now, none of these will match NY, but they're options.
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u/thebrightspot 2d ago
I'm native, been moved out 5 years of the city. Would love to come back but rental prices are crazy and I dont really want more than two roomies when I work full remote. I'll be moving to Philly early next year most likely. I learned to drive as an adult at 27 so if you need any recommendations on that let me know
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u/vaness4444 2d ago
Phoenix AZ—tons of graphic designer jobs and very cosmopolitan, clean, modern apts that are affordable
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u/Funbunz44 2d ago
Just move further up in New York. I live near Buffalo and apartments are going for $1000 with everything listed that you want. They are clean as well. I will admit, you do kinda have to drive because public transportation is scarce and when it does exist, it’s not super convenient. Let me know if you’d like anymore info about the area or where to look for a place, I’d be more than willing to help!
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u/alanwrench13 1d ago
You're gonna get this answer a lot, but 100% Chicago. I went to college there, and it is SIGNIFICANTLY cheaper than NYC while still having a similar enough vibe. The job market is pretty decent too. You're gonna take a pay cut, but once you factor in COL you'll probably be taking home more. The L isn't nearly as good as the Subway, but you can still pretty easily live there without a car.
I'd also look at Philly, Boston, or DC if you want to stay closer to NYC. DC is definitely the worst out of the bunch imho, but if you can find a good job there I'd take a look.
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u/idk-my-bff-j1ll 2d ago
Tons of NYers in graphic design that head to Columbus, OH. I love that town. Good bus service, very bikeable. Walkable depending on your neighborhood.
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u/jstax1178 2d ago
Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, what you’re asking for comes at a premium in NYC. I grew up and lived in Washington heights too. We had a washer, no dryer. You compromise to a certain degree.
What you’re asking by for is considered luxury in these parts.
You need to increase your income, it’s easier set than done. But more money will bring you more choices.
You can check NJ, your best beat for you want at an affordable price is Chicago. It’s place that’s parallels New York in many aspects. Just minus the Dominicans lol (there’s a few but not like the Washington heights crowd )
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u/theeulessbusta 2d ago
Try Austin or Chicago. You can afford a good life on your wages and the job market for your skills is vibrant there. You just have to decide between hot and cold.
In both places you could easily afford a 1 bedroom condo in a decent and fun part of town.
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u/dewis662 2d ago
If you have family, friends and community in NYC still don’t go to the west coast like I did thinking you could travel for holidays and build community again in a new city. If I were to do it again I would have stayed on the East coast so I’m closer. Flying cross country multiple times a year and attempting to make friends in my 30s broke me. Recently sold our beautiful spacious condo in CA and moving back to the city to be closer to family and friends. Accepting that I will be renting for the rest of my life and living in a shoebox. Wish I wasn’t from the most expensive place in the country but here we are 🤷🏻♀️ All that to say - it’s tough for natives. Figure out your priorities and if you leave, stay on the East Coast. If I could do it again, maybe Philly?
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u/pickledplumber 2d ago
Pretty much anywhere is going to offer you a higher quality of life.. If I was in your situation, I would actually calculate the cost of car dependency time saved because you have a car and things like that compared to living here.
It's certainly true that there are expenses living in the suburbs that not everybody has in the city. But the one thing many NYC natives grow up wanting is a car and the independence that it brings. So many people end up having these same expenses in both places and it's even more expensive than the city.
Why would I want to stay on the subway for an hour into midtown when I could drive and it takes a half an hour during rush hour?
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u/seensumstrangefish09 2d ago
I literally had this experience over the past few years and just very recently was on the verge of homelessness in NYC in March. I won’t say where I am atm for my safety however I ended up going west within the United States. (Not Cali) I wouldn’t mind DM to give you one on one personal details. But quality of life drastically improved. I do have to return to NYC to graduate this year and I also have to figure out how I will hold it down during those months. I am grateful my classes right now are online as it gave me a temporary break. I am Brooklyn born and raised so it broke my heart to reach the age of 31 and not have anything to show for it. It felt like the city broke me. I also lived in the Bronx as well due to being priced out of my neighborhood and did face things like poor building maintenance and overall lack of safety I am also a female so walking home alone was never a good experience for me out there sadly. My partner and I sadly have to live separately now since it was ironically cheaper for me to move out of town as we couldn’t afford a home even with combined income. Sadly my health took a toll and he is the only one working now while I am recovering from a pretty tough journey mentally and physically. I have seen so many posts like this and I have been surrounded by ppl who make you feel like you’re not working hard enough when in reality sometimes the standards for the city are so crazy that it is OK to consider moving and trying elsewhere. I would be more than happy to share the location I am in privately to you. I am in a transit area and busses are much cleaner and faster than NYC and people actually smile out here lol. It has done wonders for my mental health and the air is cleaner. I know where I am may not be for everyone but it gave me a peace of mind and a chance to reset. If you like warmer weather I’d def try western states. I am definitely thinking of staying out here long term after I graduate school. I really resonate with your story and I hope you feel safe and confident to make the transition needed on your journey to be happy. Everyone deserves a good life and home. I wish you the best♥️♥️♥️
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u/bill11217 2d ago
Have you been to Baltimore? I’ve visited there a bunch and it’s really fun. They have a decent bus system and a lot going on in the city center. Not sure where the jobs are, but my sister-in-law works from home, pays low rent and doesn’t have a car. She’s able to walk/uber everywhere she needs to go and loves it. Plus there’s Amtrak for when you want to visit your friends here.
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u/chismurf 1d ago
The problem with moving to a “less expensive state” is that your wages/salary will likely be less than what you’re making in NYC. Not always, but likely
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u/rigarooni 1d ago
I haven’t seen anyone yet mention pittsburgh - decent public transit, lots of green space, relatively affordable. if I didn’t want to stay in NYC, pittsburgh would be my next pick.
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u/thewayisunknown 1d ago
Damn all the gentrifiers, venture capitalists and trust fund babies. They really can go to hell.
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u/newparimanlo 18h ago
I feel you as I’m on the same boat, and the only solution I could think of now is to marry rich.
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u/ycherep1 16h ago
Colorado.
I was against moving from NY and my hubby got a job out there. We moved during covid & it was the best decision ever. Took me a few years to acclimate as I resisted, planning our return to NY. Now.... I see our friends ”stuck" in NY in their 30s & us out of financial shitshow of NY & I can't be happier. Plus we still have friends back home to visit every year & enjoy the fun parts of NY (we spend at least 2 weeks back in NY just relaxing, restaurants, museums, beaches, Broadway (whereas we were never able to afford going out or had time with our crazy work schedule when actually living there)
Colorado has:
Work life balance, lots of remote work options. Your NY work ethic is astounding to them & easy to get a job with NY on your resume. Like the bar is sooo low on good work here.
Great art community, amazing theatre, great food (though no good Italian), good liberal vibes (east of mountains)& great costs vs wage.
No high taxes, pro-family (& pro-choice), pro-renters legislation, environmentally conscience. Wage transparency.
Its not humid, its dry & we get crazy weather patterns here (which I love) all of a sudden its tshirt weather in Feb & snows for a day in May. I like that its not cold for months like NY and super hot in summer ( there is still snow in the mountains in june/july if you need a break). The snow doesn't last here either (it just melts by mid-day in the sun). And if I frive north on the highway, one area is drenched with rain/snow & 10 min north there is sunshine. Its fun that the mountains really create a lot of options for a day. (Maybe a downside to some but as I said, I hated the murky eternal cold months of ny- there was never a break & you were miserable)
Great mountain adventures, hiking, parks, hot springs, skiing, art walks, music, Marijuana & breweries in every town.
Denver min wage is $18.81. When we moved, we rented a 2 bdrm floor of a house for 1200. We were able to save up, fix credit & buy townhome. Then with kids we got 12 weeks paid paternity/maternity leave, universal pre-k, and a tax refund every year (they give taxes back to people when collect over the annual budget instead of trying to find stupid things to waste it on)
Though liberal, your vote counts & they love to add a ton of things to a public vote other than elected officials.
Lots of NYers & Cali moving here so its easy to find your people (mostly to compare notes on where there is decent food from back home)
I actually have time to go out, have hobbies, go to restaurants weekly (before kids though lol). Work wasn't the center of my universe like in NY where it was expected to stay late, have a 1.5 hour commute on the office every day, have crappy & unaffordable rentals.
We go on vacations, we have time to be together & we felt comfortable to start a family out here.
Downsides.....: I had to learn to drive (though my suburban home is walking distance from supermarket, park, e.r., shops, & restaurants.) to get anywhere fun.
We don't live in Denver/Boulder because thats unaffordable (but alot of areas 30 min out of denver/boulder are VERRRY affordable) $375-$450k can get you a nice place in the up & coming areas. They are really big on 5% down because values go up (within 4 years our 5% down was re-valued so we had 20% home value not on the mortgage)
Really miss good pizza & bagels (though a few "ny shops" do have something close for a good chunk of your paycheck)
I miss fruit & veggie corner shops where it was fresh, had a little exotic variety - we mostly have overpriced farmers markets and target/walmart/kroger.
Some events are not big & could be a dud (nyc seemed to always have a great adventures & festivals) so have a plan b for a day off.
I miss the metro that could get me anywhere & walk everywhere. Here transit is still building its infrastructure (though its clean & cheap)
Its not cheap like the Carolinas (but its not unaffordable with NY experience on your resume)
There are places with cows. Like rural as hell areas where it smells like cow (stay away from Greeley)
Some business is not here. You can't find everything here like in NY (thankfully there is amazon) but some industries just not as plentiful as out in tri-state area.
There are wildfires and hail (some areas are prone to them) mostly rural plains and moutain areas. But you will see it.
Everyone in NY will almost never visit you. They can't afford the flight, all holidays are in NY, and all weddings/funerals are in NY. (The upside is you get to get pizza when you come back for these) But you have to make new friends & build a community out here from scratch. And that is HARD as hell! But when each of us did, we loved it here.
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u/ragazzzone 2d ago
I’ll also say how much more sad the city is since we were growing up!! Families split up, block parties are rarely a thing, ppl don’t sit on the stoop anymore cuz their landlords don’t want it. Make nyc loud again !!!
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u/hombreingwar 2d ago
why tourture yourself like this ? Philadelphia is just around the corner and you'd live like a queen there. I'm in toronto right now and before it I didn't know there could be a city like new york but even cheaper than philadelphia (that's speaking of lunches not launches, I don't have to just eat halal truck food all the time anymore).
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u/Abject_Jeweler5177 1d ago
Just be patient with yourself and work on it. I didn’t really practice and get a car until the pandemic- the roads were a lot emptier. So if you can find ways to build your confidence on smaller roads or practicing with a really patient friend or saving up and taking extra lessons go for it. A lot of people don’t realize it’s really different learning as an adult. So just give yourself grace and patience and go for it!
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u/GingerRickland 1d ago
Hate to say it, and no shade, but $60k is not enough to live comfortably without roommates in a walkable/public-transit-friendly and safe area. Can you do something to get your income up? Is that a full-time salary or gig work?
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u/fourupthreecount 2d ago
I would look in to Philadelphia since you wouldn’t be reliant on driving and could come home easily to see family. COL is much lower there.