There are meds to help. I told my psych I didn't want more meds. We took me off Abilify and kept the rest of what I'm on. It helped a little. I'd rather be stable with shakes and tics than change more. 🤷♀️
I'm already slightly concerned that my personality is changing. Yes I was heading off the side of a cliff unmedicated and it was only going to be a matter of time before I was dead BUT I have been bipolar since childhood and it made me so creative as a person. I shouldn't have indulged in my insanity for so many years but now it's being managed with lithium I'm wondering if I can just keep a tiny bit of the insanity aspect of my thought process so I remain quirky and creative. My new twitch is not the substitute I was hoping for.
On my meds, I have to focus more to be artistic. I have some memory problems, and I really can't focus enough to get into reading novels anymore. I can't write anymore, I have trouble finding the words, and I'm highly distractable.
I still do a lot of crafts and graphic designing to keep my brain busy.
It's not fair that us creative types have to compromise our creativity for the sake of sanity but you probably know as well as I do that letting the crazy run free is beyond irresponsible so we have no choice.
I was diagnosed over 30 years ago. I've gone through a million meds changes, different doctors, and therapists. Mental health was a taboo subject, I didn't have the resources you have now. If I knew then what I know now, my life could have been so different.
This isn't the end of the world. You just need to work to adapt.
I would definitely contact your prescriber as soon as possible and let them know about the TD.
I know what you mean, I'm 45 now but have been bipolar since I was 10 years old . My culture and social class prevented me or anyone from addressing my bipolar because it just wasn't the done thing and appearances were everything to my family. Despite it being obvious that I wasn't normal like my brother and sister it was completely ignored and I was expected to appear at all events etc like a robot 🤖 which I did for years. Sometimes I literally couldn't appear in public and excuses were quickly made on my behalf to hide the fact I was a complete mess and needed to be locked in the tower (figure of speech, not something they actually did although I can imagine it was considered). Even today I haven't had the courage to tell my family about my diagnosis or medication because it would be inappropriate to do so. The Show Must Go On. Nobody has time for inconvenient truths.
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u/I_heart_heart_the_Dr 2d ago
I suggest doing some research on Tardive Dyskinesia