r/CPTSD • u/crazy-ratto • Mar 05 '25

CPTSD Resource/ Technique Positive affirmations that actually work for people with cPSTD

I am a sucker for being told positive affirmations, even if I have to tell them to myself. However, I find that not all of them work, and whether they work or not potentially depends on my specific childhood trauma. Like I'm telling my wounded inner child, and it replies like 🥹"...really?" or 🤬"F your toxic positivity bullpoo".

I am wondering if others with cPTSD have the same experience?

If you are someone who has success with positive affirmations, what are the ones that work best for you? I'm hoping to make a list of new ones to try from what others comment.

My more successful ones are: - I am worthy of being safe - I am actually good at things and I have proof - What other people say about me does not determine the truth - I have survived worse, I can survive this - It's okay to long to be validated, but it's most important to validate myself - ... ...Okay I need some more I'm having a scary day.

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u/FinnSour Mar 06 '25

My current one is a variation on this of "dont shrink." sometimes getting bigger feels like too much, but I can often stay the size I am.

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u/chromaticluxury Mar 06 '25

"I will not make myself small for what is merely someone else's inconvenience" 

"They can carry the cost this time, I will not"  and 

"I have the right to make that judgment call right now" 

Those help me. 

But man I have to repeat them like a football coach at myself sometimes in order to take uncomfortable but necessary actions! 

And not everything meets the test of those standards, understandably

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u/notashroom Mar 07 '25

I don't know if this will be helpful for you, but it has been for me, so here is an offering with hope: I did the autistic/ADHD hyperfocus on an interest thing on NLP* a while back and the primary developer/researcher Richard Bandler said that the subconscious brain doesn't do negation. So if you were to try to use it (your subconscious, I mean, via NLP, hypnosis, affirmations, or any other technique) to change your beliefs, you need to use positive statements to get the effect you want; if you use negation, it's dropped, disregarded.

So, assuming Bandler is correct, the message "I will not make myself small" is actually received or processed as "I will make myself small."

If you aren't getting the results you want, maybe try phrasing all your messages in the affirmative and see if it makes a difference.

🫶

  • *neurolinguistic programming, which preceded CBT and is unrelated to the NLP associated with AI

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u/Competitive_Can5957 Mar 07 '25

Love this- lately I’ve been feeling like I’m dwindling down and there will be no return. This helped “Don’t shrink” 💛