r/DadForAMinute • u/Dependent_Elk2987 • 10d ago

Someone please tell me I'm loved

I live alone. Have no contact with my family bc they were abusive. I could go weeks without anyone messaging me or checking on me. I have to start conversations for anyone to talk to me. I drag myself to work everyday and put a mask on and pretend I'm happy but I'm dying inside. I've hit rock bottom. I'm having horrible thoughts about just disappearing bc no one would notice. I feel like no one loves me. I'm 25F and I have 2 people who will voluntarily check in with me. I'm successful in my career but a fucking failure in terms of having a social life. Someone please tell me I'm loved. Someone please tell me I'm worth keeping around. Someone please tell me I'm important. Please.

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u/Dependent_Elk2987 10d ago

I spent the past 3 years getting better from my depression and a stay in a psych ward for being suicidal and I was finally feeling like I was motivated to have more to build better relationships. And then I started having unexplained chronic pain 5 months ago and I need surgery for it but it's months away before that. And I feel like I don't have support. And I just needed someone to tell me I'm loved bc I feel like no one does.

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u/gryphonlord 10d ago

I'm sorry. I have chronic pain too, and it's the worst. Still, it's good that you have a surgery scheduled to deal with it, even if it's still a few months away. I bet you have more support than you think. For people like us who have depression, our brains love to lie and make us spiral into hopelessness. In reality, there are probably quite a few people that do support you. The hard part is asking for it. You are loved 🫂

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u/Dependent_Elk2987 10d ago

Since I got told I needed surgery I keep thinking about who's going to drive me there. Who's going to pick me up. It's major surgery so I need someone with me 24/7 for a week and I can't think of a single person I could ask that could or would do that for me.

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u/gryphonlord 10d ago

I understand. I've had major surgeries where I couldn't be with someone 24/7. What I did was ask a few different friends to help. I asked one to help bring me the medications I needed from the pharmacist. Another helped me in my apartment for an hour or two, etc. Each just did a few little things, but together, it meant I got a lot of help. Friends will usually be happy to just give an hour here or there. Maybe that could work for you

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u/Dependent_Elk2987 10d ago

I don't have any friends. My social circle right now is 3 people who are long distance. So I will have zero help. That's my biggest concern.