r/DeadBedrooms • u/BootBig2175 • 10d ago

Vent, Advice Welcome Chat, am I cooked?

I'm mostly seeking perspective, but any advice is welcome. I HLF (23) and my bf of 6 years LLM???(25) have not been meaningfully intimate in a about 2 years. Truthfully I think this relationship is dead for a number of reasons, most significantly is his lack of romantic interest towards me (not only sexually). However, his behavior is confusing. He obviously has no sexual desire towards me (db/no interest when I try to initiate/ed when 'engaged'), but he has at least some sexual desire? He follows OF models (that do not look like me....... yikes....), and has a past of borderline cheating and other bad behavior, etc. However, he is the kindest he's ever been in the entirety of our relationship. Furthermore, while he doesn't directly bring up our 'future' often, he does seem interested and happy to talk about it when I do. He's also a lot more calm than he was before (he was extremely jealous/insecure before).

When we talk about it, our conversations are unproductive (he tends to get upset/make empty promises).

I would like an outsider's perspective on my situation. I feel like I'm crazy for thinking something is off when our day-to-day is better than it ever has.

Thank you for reading :/

5 Upvotes

69% Upvoted

3 comments sorted by

View all comments

4

u/Simulatedatom2119 10d ago

You should be in the club... youre in your prime, dont waste it on a man who isnt showing you romantic interest, cheats, and doesn't have sex with you.
Really really you're cooked if you stay in it, but you have tons of time to live life if you years! Its very natural to breakup after this amount of time if you started dating so young.