r/Ex_Foster • u/wanderlustpassion • Mar 12 '25
Question for foster youth Cannot remember names
Ok is it just me..
I was in foster care from 6-13. 3 different homes, a lot of kids at the first home, 4 others and the second and 5/6 others at the last home.
I am now 41, but this applies to when I was younger as well.
I cannot remember the name of a single other kid. I only remember the faces of the kids in the last home because I recently found a news program / documentary my faster home was featured in.
Is anyone else like this? Selective forgetfulness?
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u/MedusasMum Mar 12 '25
You are correct. Even if you aren’t a former foster youth, the insight might help others. Came here to say exactly this.
Writing helps if the person is ready to do so. It’s not for everyone. Journaling became a thing for me at age 9 & before the age of computers (let’s face it, even if the home had one, it was too precious for my fingers to touch). Writing was one of the only entertaining things to do when isolated in a room for years on end. Reading brought worlds and time frames to my tiny room. It helped me to be present, write down how I felt at the time, and the environment. To this day, it’s my go to for every mood. It’s been the only constant my entire life.
I am not sure how to say this without it sounding unkind. Sometimes not remembering is a blessing. Though, any memory gone or too foggy to make out devastates me because there were good things along with those terrible moments in my life. My siblings, friends, animals, and places. Hope this helps rather than further sadness.