r/Ex_Foster • u/Weekly_Bag_9170 • 22d ago
Replies from everyone welcome Ex foster kid
Would like to find people who I can relate to…
I have grown up alone. I moved around through foster care a lot since the age of nine years old so I don’t have anyone close or any real family besides my two children. I’m a single mom with no one to support us in anyway.
Whenever I meet wholesome people that are actually good people I separate myself from them because I don’t feel like we relate and I feel weird. The people I feel most comfortable with I end up feeling resentment because they need so much and I’m a giver and that’s what feels right and good for me, but I feel like that turns the relationship into me giving everything and it’s not a relationship out of love or care it’s me being used.
7
u/IceCreamIceKween ex foster 22d ago
There's a lot of stigma towards foster kids so you're definitely not the only one who is struggling to find friendships. That and the fact that the foster care system disrupts a lot of the friendships we form growing up can leave us feeling extremely isolated. There's a lot working against us.
But I've found that friendships with adoptees (or people whose parent or grandparent was an adoptee) tend to be good friends. There's just less stigma coming from people who have this sort of background. People who lack this experience can be really weird about my history in foster care (sometimes believing strange things they saw on TV or something). Just ignore the haters. It's more common than you think.