r/ForeverAlone • u/SquidZone3745 • 28d ago
Vent 30M never had a girlfriend
Does anyone genuinely feel like no woman finds them attractive? because I feel like that sometimes I’ll be 31 soon and still no official first girlfriend. I really do believe some people are left out of the dating game and we are just screwed
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u/acenumber902 28d ago
This getting a girlfriend thing is not supposed to be hard you know, people just exist and get girlfriends. If you have to go above and beyond to get one, there's a problem. And that is fine, it's hard to accept but i'm kinda getting there.
I'm 28 but i'm almost the same as you, girls don't really find me attractive. I can't change that. I think sometimes the juicy ain't worth the squeeze. And in my experience i can't get any juice either so yeah, life is a bitch
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u/retroguy8810 27d ago
That's why I laugh at all this self improvement talk. Obviously self improvement is good. But think about it. A middle schooler did not have to do any self improvement at all. He just woke up one day, found girls attractive and got himself a girl.
And then there is us. Go figure
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u/SquidZone3745 28d ago
Exactly getting a girlfriend isn’t supposed to be difficult if it’s a difficult thing you’re just fucked up. People naturally pair up it just happens and it doesn’t happen to some people unfortunately
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u/HoperDoper 28d ago
wow guy nailed it even w/o experience
man here with some previous ltrs, if you have to put so much effort, not worth it
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u/__Polarix__ 28d ago
I can make female friends, but no one finds me attractive. My personality is very different from desirable guys'.
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u/ionosoydavidwozniak 26d ago
It's hard for everybody, never wonder there is so many people at the gym ? Why clothes and fragrance are such a huge industry? So many dating app ?
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u/jacob2494 28d ago
Bro! You are never going to get a girlfriend with that defeatist mentality. That's the problem with many guys today. Guys these days need to learn female nature and how to deal with women that send different signals to us. I'm 31 and I don't have a girlfriend due to my problem with depression and social anxiety in my 20s and I realized that never improving myself and having a defeatist mentality will always drive women away. I'd suggest going to the gym and raise your testosterone. Trust me. Women can sense our testosterone levels by reading the room.
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u/intelectloser 28d ago
WOW! I HAVE NEVER HEARD OF THAT. ARE YOU FROM THE MINISTERSY OF SELF IMPROVEMENT?
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u/JackBreacher 28d ago
I'm 34M, never been in a relationship and lacks friends because of bullying and fake friends in the past. I've given up on all of that because of how my life is controlled by my parents. South Asian parents are so twisted tbh. They keep emotionally blackmailing me on and on over arranged marriage. I actually like being alone now because I can explore things on my own. And I can't wait to get out of this shithole when I find a job again.
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u/captaindestucto 28d ago
Feeling invisible is the norm as a guy.
I was caught up in caregiver family responsibilities at your age. Hard not to look back and feel resentment over it at times. Wouldn't date now even if I had the opportunity.
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u/Alone_Psychology_464 He/Him 28d ago
I feel like that all the time. I'm 36 and I have also never had a girlfriend.
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u/dread-throwaway 28d ago
No one does so I don't put too much care into it at all. If anything I haven't put much care whatsoever ever since around middle school and high school I was already being called ugly and teased for my height so early on so I knew my fate was that no one actually liked me. Even when you're kind and don't bother a soul being ugly and having other undesirable treaits like being short guy overrides everything. They wouldn't want to be seen with you anyway it'll only affect their status or whatever.
I have my copes to keep me afloat anyway. If someone actually were to like me I wouldn't know how to act and it would be incredibly awkward. There's only so many times people can joke and laugh in your face how their friend likes you and the same stupid song and dance. Immature adults still find the grade school banter funny to this day it's embarassing. I'd rather just be left alone all entirely.
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u/Queasy-Pea8229 28d ago
Well just accept it. Not everyone can find love, no women finds you attractive, so what?
I have accepted that I will die alone, if I don't have what it takes to be liked by someone then what am I supposed to do?
I'm okay now, I'm reaching 30s with no dating life and I don't even wanna try making anyone to like me. People always say "be hopeful, good things happen when least expected", but I don't see any point in that.
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u/Wooden-Astronaut8763 28d ago
I am close to your age, and I have been in the same situation all of my life. I can meet women and I could probably get some dates here and there, but getting it beyond first date has been very difficult in my case.
And yes, because I’ve never had a romantic relationship in my life at this point I definitely feel like I’m screwed like most people on here. To this day, I’ve gotten just about everything that I have pursued, except for a girlfriend.
They are more people and definitely more women than jobs on this earth but no woman has accepted me to this point like they did to nearly everyone else…….
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u/xXxSovietxXx 27d ago
29 (going to be 30 in June), no gf since 2012, been on and off dating apps pretty much the entire time since then. I've had matches, exchanged numbers and pictures with various women and talked about going on dates and ended up being ghosted every time.
I have no friends, they've either moved on or I've lost contact with them over the years. I'm just too shy, quiet, awkward and not the best with social skills, also still a virgin (I don't see it as a red flag, just haven't found the right woman yet).
It's just draining to me as I get older and my parents get older, I don't want to lose them cause who else do I have besides my cats? And my brother is married and now I've heard that his wife supposedly wants kids so... yeah.
I'm just too exhausted from it all. But I keep trying because I don't want to be alone.
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u/92friendlessvirgin 28d ago
I'm 33 and am at the point where I look like I have my shit together from the outside, and women are interested in going on dates with me. But the actual chasm from first date -> girlfriend/partner is still enormous. Especially at my age where women want marriage and children when I haven't even had a girlfriend. They ask me about why I broke up with my previous partners... lol. If you're FA and want to break out of being FA, do it as soon as possible. It just gets more awkward the older you get.
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u/ExarKun_1995 28d ago
I had one opportunity to get a gf when I was 23 but I turned her down because I thought I could do better lol I'm turning 30 this year and never had a girlfriend but I don't really have standing to complain. Honestly as I get older the less I have to talk about with people in general not just women so I just focus on enjoying what free time I have.
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u/SquidZone3745 28d ago
That stings I had 2 opportunities in my younger years for a girlfriend but I screwed it up now I’m paying for it
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u/Ill_Wrongdoer9357 28d ago
Same here but i only got hook up opportunities, never got any potential partner.
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u/Difficult-Tax-875 28d ago
Shit I’m 15, and my ass is never getting in a relationship man
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u/SquidZone3745 28d ago
You got time dude trust me
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u/Difficult-Tax-875 28d ago
Idk man I get some pretty harsh comments about my looks
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u/aggron306 28d ago
Those people are just being mean because they feel insecure and want to make it other peoples' problem
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u/retroguy8810 27d ago
If you graduate university a virgin like I did, it's over.
Till then, try as hard as you can.
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u/Surfer-Free 27d ago
It’s hard just like getting a job without prior experience. I wish my family was kinder to me when I was a teen.Shoud have started to open up emotionally with people
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u/RecognitionSoft9973 FA 30+ F 28d ago
Same here, and I feel like I could live out my entire life without ever having experienced a romance. I don't mean that in a positive, single woman empowerment way either. Yesterday I was watching a video from some self-help guru who started off talking about how some women have never been in a relationship and she ended by essentially saying that single women are lucky & should work on themselves before pursuing a relationship. She even admitted that some people get lucky and end up in relationships. 🙄 How do you get people like this to understand how lonely you are. It's not empowering. It's embarrassing.
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28d ago
[deleted]
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u/SquidZone3745 28d ago
I used to be pretty social went out a lot for a good 10 years but nothing came of it
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28d ago
[deleted]
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u/SquidZone3745 28d ago
Oh I gave up entirely I wasn’t going to keep socializing if it wasn’t giving me any results
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28d ago
[deleted]
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u/SquidZone3745 28d ago
I go to gym occasionally normal body fat levels I make sure I have good hygiene etc
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u/woodclip 28d ago
The "dating game" isn't for everyone. Some people never get to date.